New update ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The clock ticked away slowly on the light gray wall as Mrs. Harper wrote on her board. The green dry erase marker squeaked as it wrote in Spanish. I was lost inside the dull classroom, waiting for my escape into my next class. I see a blur at my side out of my peripherals, turning my head ever so slightly to see what they needed. A slip of paper folded up into a triangle lands in the palm of my hand. "Are you and Sam, you know?", it read in girly, large handwriting. I looked around to see who had sent the paper over to me, seeing a bottle blonde two seats behind me. "It depends on what 'you know' means. I know we're friends. What do you know?", I scrawled onto the paper quickly. I passed the paper back to it's origin, seeing that the sender was indeed the blonde girl. "It's just you two looked awful close this morning. I thought you both might have figured it out.", she wrote back. Figured it out? What? Honestly, she kind of sounds a bit like Jen. My phone buzzed near the end of class, making me jump a little. I looked up to see everyone look over at me. I slipped my phone out of my back pocket and checked my screen. Sam's name glowed across the screen, making me smile a little. I had the "giddy schoolgirl" expression written all over my face, it felt like everyone knew why. "Hey about this morning, you owe me for the tardy I got lol", he sent me. "I owe you nothing haha I told you that you should've gone, but you insisted", I answered back quickly. I stared intently at the bright screen as I waited for his answer. I reflected back on Saturday night, when I asked him to stay. I woke up nightmare-less and in his arms, safe. I fell asleep with such ease that night, it was nice. "Hmmm well I'll let you have this one.... only if you let me take you home.", he finally answered. I'd much rather ride home in his car than Jonas's, mostly because I might not be able to handle anymore of him today. If I see him again, I'll cave. "Ok haha though it seems like you want me to owe you more", I replied. "You could never owe too much with me, besides I never got to pick you up this morning. So, I'm taking you home.", I read slowly. The bell rang, letting us out of our morning class. I had class with Jonas next block, luckily we had to write an essay. I could barely stay in my seat when he walked past it. The class had barely started and I wasn't sure I could make it five minutes. I threw myself into my essay, trying to forget Jonas ever existed. It was hard, but I managed to finish with ten minutes left of class and Jonas was still writing. I walked out of class quickly, wanting to see Sam next block. Even though AP Chem sucked, all my friends were there and it made it ten times better. The class flew by and so did the rest of the day. I walked out to the parking lot and found Sam's car. My back leaned on the side door as I waited for him to show. The cold metal chilled me to the bone as it went through my shirt. I looked up at the cloudy sky, watching them float away slowly. The car unlocked and I shifted my gaze to the driver's side. "Hey there.", I said as I slid into the passenger seat. The scent returned to me slowly, remembering the sleepover and all the car rides before. Every time I catch it, it makes me want to relax and go with the flow. "Hey.", Sam smiled as he shut his door.
Mel's Review Station Story: Perfection ~ The Not So Perfect Story Written by: ashleemac14 Extra Information: Review done after reading up to page 7. Originality~ The story line, first day back at school and meets new guy. Her guy friend being jealous of him. Seen before but it is worth a read if you like or enjoy these types of stories. Interest~ I've seen the story line a lot of times but what makes yours stand out is the good description. I kept reading through out, though sometimes the grammatical errors made me a bit distracted from the main story. Characters~ We all get to know the main two characters almost straight away, the main girl and the boy she bumped into. The writer has put in a good amount of characters so readers will not get bored. Some are the 'typical' characters you would seen in High School stories like the mean girl but it has been portrayed at a good standard. Grammar~ A few typos and one mistake I kept on seeing is when you would put a com or after someone spoke, when it either had a full stop or question mark. Example: "Silly, come on it's going to be fun.", Suzy coaxed her brother. Where it can be put as: "Silly, come on it's going to be fun." Suzy coaxed her brother. Also the placing of , was a little over done, same as the full stops. It's fine to use it for added effect but try not to use it all the time and let the sentence flow on. Summary Review~ For fans of the High School love stories it is for you. It has nice clear short updates but can be generous and give long updates.
So I decided to do another POV. This time for Jonas, since Sam already had his POV. I just wanted to let you all in on some inner thoughts. Anyways it's short, but there will be another update soon. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Jonas's POV ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I clenched my fists until my knuckles appeared white. Why does she always go for that guy? I made sure to show up this morning. I made sure that he wouldn't to get to her. I needed to have her and I will. I will get her away from him, so that she would see that she needed me too. The wheels of my truck sped down the black asphalt to release some steam. My body is still tense from the frustrating feelings I get when i think of her. She is a challenge compared to the others. It should have been done the night of the party, but that stupid guy got in my way. "Damn it!" I yelled, slamming my fist on the dashboard. My hands turn the wheel swiftly, making a u-turn and heading toward Taylor's house. My foot turned slowly bit by bit into lead. I wanted to catch her before she went out with him. The clouds were rolling in as I got closer to her house. It would be the perfect cover for me. She would never see me, but I would see everything I needed to. I parked my truck a few blocks away from her house and walked into the woods. I leaned up against a tree that was in front of her house, though still deep enough in the woods not to be seen. It was a good place to keep watch over her, to protect her. This way if Sam shows up, I'll sweep in and take her away. It's foolproof. I saw her check the mail and take out the trash. She looked adorable in her sweats and her hair in that messy bun. Her hair matched her attitude, fiery. I just wanted to run out to her and take her up in my arms. Just after her brothers left, I thought it would be my chance. I wanted to show up and surprise her, but thats when her parents showed up. The sky was beginning to flash and rumble sporadically. I watched as she saw her parents off, now she was alone and we could be alone. My body began shivering from standing out there for so long, maybe rain wasn't the best mix. I walked away slowly, making plans for my next visit here to protect her.
Sorry for not updating for the past few days. The new update has been done since my last post, but I haven't had time to post it. Anyways, enjoy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I stood in my driveway, seeing my parents off to their anniversary trip. I was alone again in the house tonight, the boys spending the night with one of their numerous friends. I thought about calling Jen over, but I remembered that she was with Armando tonight. After the movie night with Sam and I, they started dating officially. I started walking back to my door, the sunset was a little darker than usual. The clouds overhead looked like rain and a lot of it. The cold wood floor under my feet froze my body from the inside out. I thought about what Jen and the bottle blonde said, the television droning on in the background. I didn't know what there was to figure out about me and Sam, besides my feelings for him. It's not like he could feel the same about me, though this morning could've fooled anyone. If we had more time, there's no doubt that I would've kissed him. The house shook a little from the thunder outside, it was definitely going to rain soon. I stared out the window, wearing a blanket around my body. My breath showed on the window pane, the raindrops just starting to fall. The lightning cracked across the sky, lighting up the dark room by itself. The rain started to come down harder, blurring the view from outside through the window. I crawled onto my bed and curled up with Sam's pillow, though his scent was almost gone. The glowing numbers read 7:15 and thought about how tonight was probably going to be another restless night. The nightmares were still happening and I couldn't stop them no matter how hard I tried. The only one who could was Sam and he wasn't here, not even his lingering scent. A few hours passed, still no luck falling asleep. I might be scared to even go to sleep because the nightmares just relived each other. I was tired, but if it meant reliving it again, I'd rather stay awake. I grabbed my phone, seeing it was 9:30, then got up and stuck it in my pocket. I grabbed the keys and locked my house up, knowing my parents wouldn't be back until tomorrow afternoon. The downpour outside drenched my clothes within a minute of walking in it, even with my raincoat. I set toward Sam's house, wanting to see him now. Thirty minutes later, his house was in my sights and I could barely make it. I was drained physically from my lack of sleep and walking in the rain on a cold winter night. My knuckles met with the red wood door over and over, hoping Sam would show up to answer. I hit my head against the door, finally giving up when he answered. "Taylor?"