Katalina sat on her bed that night. She was numb. She couldn't tell wether to laugh or to cry. She felt as free as a falling feather, yet as if the weight of the world was on her shoulders. She looked up at her ceiling and fell back till her back met the bed. Not only was Ryan not talking to her, but neither was Charlie. She texted him, called him, even went to his house but his car wasn't there. She didn't know what to do. She thought that this ignoring was worse than Sean's clinginess. When she was with Sean, all she wanted was for him to leave her alone for a bit. Now that Charlie was doing just that though, she didn't know what to do. What had she done wrong? It couldn't have been just Ryan. She told Ryan that she loved him, but she was forever Charlie's. She turned around though and Charlie wasn't there. Was she not worthy of him? Did he not want her anymore? Was she right back to square one? She couldn't go back to dating boys like Sean. No, she would kill herself before she would do that. Katalina stood up off her bed and took a couple steps till she found herself standing infront of her mirror. Placing both hands on it, she looked at herself. She watched a tear stream down her cheek and hit the floor. She wondered. Wondered why she could just never be happy. There were so many reasons for Charlie not to love her. Yet he did anyway, then was worse than Sean and tore her heart out. "You're so ugly," she whispered. "Ugly. Ugly. Ugly." The whispers continued, getting a little louder wih each time. It builded up, louder and louder, till she was screaming. She slammed her fist against her mirror, cracking it with such force. "You are so freaking ugly!" she screamed at her reflection. "You're ugly! And stupid! And naive! And not wanted! And not," she stopped and slumped down against he mirror before she could choke out the last word, "loved". She sobbed heavily as she pulled her knees to her chest. The loud wails were painful, and finally they turned into hyperventilation. She pounded her fists against he floor until her knuckles were bright read and bloody. She leaned her head back and just screamed. She screamed bloody murder then went back to crying into her knees, trying to pull them closer to her. She planned on sobbing the night away. She cried and cried until she heard a noise coming from outside her window and on the balcony. It sounded like someone was trying to come up.