The Mystery Girl

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Dj_Comet, Jan 16, 2013.

  1. Bump nice story!!
     
  2. Ok height doesnt matter
     
  3. I think this story is great the way ur going with it
     
  4. Thanks, I will update soon
     
  5. Maddison's POV
    *****************
    The teacher said his name is Aaron, he acts like a kid but with a who cares attitude. I looked around the class, and when I turned around this girl had her hand out to me.

    "Hey I'm Emily, sorry for my little brother's outburst." I shook hef hand, but when I finally realized what she said I almost yelled, "Wait that's your brother, but...but..."

    Emily laughed, "What we look nothing alike? I know, I got dad's mexicano side." I kept looking back and forth for similarities, none. Emily looks 16, with wavy black shoulder length hair and her eyes light brown like hershies. Out the corner of my eye I saw Aaron turn in his test followed by Alex. I decided to finish my test and the bell rung. Outside of the class, I saw a a group of cheerleaders around Aaron and Alex. I walked up to Emily and asked, "Are those two popular?"

    "Yea, Aaron is the basketball captain and star while Alex is the football captain and star."

    "Oh, so how long have they been friends and why do they rarely laugh?"

    "Aren't you little miss nosy but to answer your question its kindergarten and because their best friend "died"."
     
  6. This is a really good story update!
     
  7. Hits kindergarten?
     
  8. The answer to the question, "How long have they been friends?"
     
  9. Since kindergarten*
     
  10. I think you should add more description, but like Shannon said, try to weave it into the story so it looks better and a lot better to read
     
  11. please BUMP!!!!! please
     
  12. Ok ok I'll update soon