Post joke here 

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by iPapi_Make-_-Mami-_-Beg, May 27, 2014.

  1. While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, "No honey for you for one month!"

    Later that afternoon, Johnny's dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. "That's it! No butter for you for one month!" says his dad.

    Later that evening as Johnny's mother cooks dinner, a cockroach run across the kitchen floor. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her.

    Little Johnny looks at his father and says, "Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?
     
  2. A cock roach** 
     
  3. How do you make a plumber sad?
    Kill its family
     
  4. It was raining cats and dogs. I think I just stepped in a poodle.
     
  5. Are you guys having pun yet? 
     
  6. Not right meow but that's nacho fault. If you wanna taco about it my ears are open. All are whale come
     
  7. I was told after having some blood tests that I'm blood type A but turns out it was a type O.
     
  8. This is a dumb blonde joke, please don't judge. Lol. I don't think all blondes are stupid.

    Three women stumble upon a lamp while walking along a cliff. A red head, a brunette, and a blonde. They each rub the lamb and a genie appears. He says "alright, all three of you rubbed the lamp, so you each get one wish." The brunette says "well, we are trying to get down this cliff" the genie replies with "alright. Ill put a pool down there. Each one of you wish on what you want it to be filled with" the brunette says "Sprite!" And jumps off the cliff into a pool of sprite. The red head says "Coke!" And jumps off the cliff into a pool of coke. The blonde jumps off whiteout saying anything. On her what down, she yells "WEEEEEEEEEE!"
    ?
     
  9. What's the difference between a boy skeleton and a girl skeleton?
    A boy has a Halloweenie
     
  10. I'm in shape

    Round is a shape
     
  11. What did the the printer say to the paper?
    Nothing
     
  12. What did jb. Say to his finger oh baby baby bay oh right
     
  13. Why was the old times often called the 'Dark Ages'?

    - Because they have many KNIGHTS 
     
  14. What cheese is not yours??

    - NACHO CHEESE 
     
  15. Heres a joke












    NOOB A*SHOLE
     
  16. ^ this guy. Claim your prize now
     
  17. I'LL FUCKING EAT YOU
     
  18. You can't even be a thief no more! The other day I was Robbin this liquor store right. And I come back out with a load of Cash and some fool stole my car!

    As I'm getting arrest I told the police officer "yes fool Ik I robbed that store but some fool stole my car man!! I wanna press charges!!"

    So they put me in the back of the squad car and took me to jail. They put me in a cell with this one dude so I asked him "what you in for" this fool said " I stole this cat and the idiot didn't have an oil in his car so it stalled about 1 mile from where I stole it from" I said " Fool that was My Car!!! I could have given you a ride fool if you'd just have asked!!"