God, I missed those Her face turned red. Her eyes began to haze. "Carrie, I have to." "Please… don't." I tried to hold her but she pushed me away. She backed away from me and started crying. She hung her head and covered her face. "I went through all of that. Everything. For you. I did it because- because you make me happy." she turned away from me. "I don't know what to feel anymore." "Carrie, I-" "Get out." Those words fell to the floor. "Bu-" "Get out!" she screamed in between sobs. "Just leave me alone!" And with that I was gone.
I drove home. Cheeks wet. Eyes red. When I got home, I threw myself onto my bed and cursed into my pillow for what felt like hours, until I fell asleep. I had a nightmare that night. I heard Carrie calling my name. She kept calling and calling. I could not move an inch. Then I saw her. Sitting all alone, tears running down her cheeks. Her face was red and she sat motionless beyond crying and calling. "Jack?" I tried to answer but I couldn't speak. Suddenly, Carrie was in a puddle of blood. Her wrists were cut and were blistered in pools of crimson. She sat, still motionless. She called out my name one last time. "Jack?" Then she fell.
Sorry for not updating yesterday. I was busy buying green skirts and yoga pants for st. Patrick's day. I woke up in a cold sweat. I must have been making a considerable amount of noise because my parents yelled at me to shut up. It was four in the morning. I put my pants on, grabbed a shirt and my keys, then I left. I walked to my car and started it up. Out of gas, of course. I started walking. It was cold. Very cold. I should've brought my jacket. My chest was quite cold. I figure it had to do with my heart. I didn't know where I was walking but I just wanted to get away. I had to be alone. I was alone. I don't know how long I walked for or how far I went. I just kept walking. I passed the park. I saw the tree that we sat under. It was growing flowers but they were all dark in the night. The playground was still shitty and the whole park was lifeless besides me. I was all alone.
Hey guys, really really sorry about the wait. Hope you forgive me (puppy eyes) I just walked and walked eventually I got to an intersection with a stop sign. The stopsign had been "vandalized" and was changed to read "STOP AND THINK." I did just that. I stopped walking. I thought about Carrie and the joy she brought into my otherwise horrible life and the way that we smiled when we saw each other. But I also thought about the tears that I had to wipe from her beautiful face. I thought about the hatred that people showed us just because we liked each other. Just because I wasn't cool enough or because Carrie was too popular. I thought about the bruises that they had given me because I had feelings. True feelings that assholes like them shouldn't even be allowed to feel. I started walking back home. Those words stuck in my mind. STOP AND THINK