jokes! or scary stories!

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by *lemonsqweeze (01), May 6, 2011.

  1. LMFAO At all those stories. I can't sleep now. I'll post my story tomorrow.
     
  2. Aw hell no!!!! I iz scared now 
     
  3. More more more. Lol I love scary stories and softball. Don't tell anyone, it's a secret. Shhhhhhh. 
     
  4. Here's one

    A man was walking down the highway when a skull fell from the sky. One by one skeleton parts fell until the skeleton built itself. The man started to run but the skeleton kept chasing him. The farther they ran, the more flesh came onto the skeleton. Once the skeleton had all the flesh, an axe popped into his hands. But the man didnt have hands. He wondered how they got there when he recieved a photo on his cell phone. It showed his wife dead with no hands. The man was shocked. The skele-man threw the axe and missed the man. The man picked up the axe and chopped off the skele-man's head. Then he chopped off his head. But he was still alive. He looked exactly like the skeleton man.
     
  5. So i was sleeping right an i wokr up to like a ghostly voice calling my name i woke up looked around my room no one was in my room i went back to sleep an it happend again woke up a looked around still noone happened once more an still noone t

    True story any ideas
     
  6. A girl broke into a house. It was all black. She lifted up an axe and chopped open the safe. There was a head in it. She turned around and saw a ghost. It chopped her head off. She was never saw again.
     
  7. Seen*
    Not scary at all
     
  8. This one really creeped me out when I heard it:

    Drip, Drip, Drip

    One night a young girl, Lily Foster, is left alone for the night, in her country house, while her parents drove out to town for a party. This was fine with Lily, especially since she had her faithful dog, Scout, protecting her throught the night. She made herself something to eat, and sat down at the kitchen table. Turning on the radio to her favorite station, she was surprised to hear a news bulleten declaring that an avenged murderer was on the loose. It advised that people secure all windows and doors as a safety precaution. With her dog by her side, the young girl locked the front and back doors. She went from window to window, and locked each of them one at a time. She reassured herself that she would be fine with her trusty dog, and that her parents would be home shortly, anyway. So, Lily had a pleasant, peaceful evening, and finally decided around eleven o'clock that it was time for bed. She climbed the stairs to her bedroom, and slid under the big, warm blanket on her bed. Before closing her eyes, reached her hand down under the bed, and allowed her dog to lick it- she did this every night, because it comforted her. A short while later she awoke to the sound of a scratching noise at her bedrooom window. She eyed the window, and reminded herself that the whole house was locked and she was safe. She stuck her hand under her bed and felt her dog's slobbery tongue cross over the palm of her hand. She sighed and went back to sleep. An hour or so later she sat up in bed...She had heard footsteps in the hallway, and crept out of bed to see if it was possibly just her parents returning from their party. Seeing nothing, she returned to bed. As she was about to stick her hand under the bed, she heard a drip, drip, drip, followed by some footsteps. She walked downstairs into the kitchen and secured the the taps. That surely wasn't the source of the drip. She crept upstairs and climbed into bed. "This is silly," she told herself "I'm probably just imagining things." She stuck her hand under the bed, and felt the dog lick her hand. An hour later she awoke again. A little mad at this point, she jumped out of bed. The dripping wasn't coming from the kitchen so it must be from the bathroom. She crept along the side of the hallway, and walked into the bathroom. She groped along the side of the wall with her left hand, looking for the light switch. She flicked the light on and gasped. There, hanging from the shower rod was Scout-skinned-a pool of blood had formed on the bathroom tile with a continuous 'drip, drip, drip' as the blood from the dog hit the ground. Something on the wall caught her eye; written on the wall was a message in blood..."Humans can lick too."
     
  9. Here's one just for shorty and lemon.

    A girl jumped into an open grave. She closed the coffin. After five seconds she came out. She looked like a zombie. She started toward town. One by one she killed people by eating off their head, arms and legs. When a man saw the zombie girl he started to run. But the zombie kept limping after him. When the man got home he grabbed his shotgun and shot the zombie. Her zombie head started bleeding and guts started to come out. She screamed. The man shot her again. But the bullet curved back and killed himself. The zombie started to eat his guts. When the sun started to rise, she returned to the grave. She went into the coffin and closed the door. After five seconds she came out as a regular girl. Every night it happened all over again. After a year she was the only one left. That night when she turned into a zombie since she was the only one left she ate herself. Her soul traveled to hell and she started to turn into a girl again. But when satin came, he shot her and she turned back into a zombie. She stayed a zombie after that. Every night she was fed rat brains and chicken hearts. She soon started to love satin. She asked satin to marry her and he said yes. At the altar after satin said i do she said i dont and ate off satin's head. She was now the ruler of hell.

    THE END
     
  10. Priya I wrote the same story but in a different way  yours was a lot better
     
  11. Oh sorry! My bad...I got it from google lol
     
  12. One more!!!

    Arabella

    A little girl, named Penny Warren, was given a small doll by her parents. The doll was a gift from an ancient great aunt who had now passed on. Penny was instantly unnnerved by the doll, which had nasty little black eyes that seemed to follow her around the room and a sinister grin on her face. Nevertheless, Penny had to accept the doll, as she was well brought up and didn't want to upset her parents by refusing to take it. Her parents told her that the doll's name was Arabella, which made Penny even more afraid of it; it seemed to make it more human. Even so, it was just a doll, barely reaching above her knee, so to put her mind at rest, she hid Arabella into the little cupboard under the stairs, under some boxes where her parents wouldn't see her. It wasn't until a few nights later, when Penny was lying in bed, that she heard a noise...a shuffling sound that went on for about five minutes. Then, a brief dragging noise and finally, a scuttling like light footsteps running very fast. Penny was paralyzed with fear, her knuckles turning white from clutching her blanket. Then, she heard a voice - soft and eerily childlike - quiet enough not to wake her parents. Penny always slept with the door open and the lamp in the hall on, as she was still a little scared of the dark. Therefore, she could hear more through her open door. Penny heard the voice say "Penny, I'm on the first step"...And then a loud scrabbling again, as whatever was speakingapparently turned tail and returned to wherever it had come from. The little girl didn't sleep a wink that night, but laid in fear until the break of dawn when her mother got her up for school and when she tried to explain what had happened, her parents passed it off as "just a dream". The next night, Penny fought against sleep, but eventually drifted off, only to be woken again by the sinister voice: "Penny, I'm on the fifth step" Penny was crying by now, and again, she didn't sleep that night. The next night, Penny decided to shut her bedroom door and reluctantly slept without the light on. Just as she was about to doze, Penny heard the noise, and then the voice: "Penny, I'm on the top step..." Penny knew that her door was closed, but she was still terribly afraid. Her heart pounding, she slowly go up to investigate; she screamed. Penny's parents found her body at the bottom of the stairs. They guessed she was on her way to the bathroom without switching on the hall light and had fallen down the stairs, breaking her neck. Arabella, the favorite family doll, was found beside her body - smiling.
     
  13. I get so scared after reading all this but I still love 'em...lol, right now I'm hiding under a blanket holding my friend and his hands tightly lol
     
  14. Boyfriend?  
     
  15. Nah bestestttt friend
     
  16. Just date him already
     
  17. Just so we don't get off topic...I know, not scary at all!!! But it's a long story shorty you won't understand. But just know that we will be together
    The Red Ribbon is a scary story about a girl who wears something around her neck that she refuses to take off.



    Bill whistled as he strolled through the park. He was on his way to meet his girlfriend, Sally. He could smell spring in the air. He jingled the engagement ring in his pocket and thought about asking Sally to marry him.

    Sally sat down on a park bench and Bill kneeled down in front of her.

    “Sally,” Bill said, “you are the most beautiful girl I’ve ever met. I love you and I want you to be my wife. Will you marry me?”

    Sally laughed and said, “Yes! I will marry you.”

    As Bill gazed lovingly at his bride-to-be, his eyes lingered on the red velvet ribbon Sally always wore around her neck.

    “Why do you always wear that red ribbon?” Bill asked.

    Sally said, “Bill, I must never take off my red ribbon!”

    Bill smiled at Sally and left the ribbon alone.

    Bill and Sally were married that June. Bill found a lovely little house in a nice neighborhood and they moved in.

    Bill bought Sally many party dresses. But Sally always wore her red ribbon with each outfit. Bill thought this was odd.

    Sally just smiled and said, “I must never take off my red ribbon.”

    After a few years, Sally found out she was going to have a baby. This news delighted Bill.

    Sally talked with her friends who had babies. Bill talked with his buddies who had children.

    They talked together late into the night about what they had learned from everyone.

    When the big day came, Sally said, “Please tell the doctor I must not take off my red ribbon!”

    Bill was frustrated. But he promised Sally that he would tell the doctor.

    After the baby was born, Bill gave Sally flowers.

    “Thank you for the flowers, Bill,” Sally said. “And thank you for telling the doctor I must not take off my red ribbon.”

    Bill did not understand why the red ribbon was so important.

    “Do you want to hold little Billy?” Sally asked.

    Bill, Sally, and little Billy lived happily for many years in the small, lovely house in the nice neighborhood.

    When little Billy was a baby, he would sometimes reach for the red ribbon around his mother’s neck. Sally would gently take his little hands in hers and coo at him, saying, “Mommy must never ever take off her red ribbon!”

    The red ribbon had frustrated Bill for a long time. He loved Sally with all of his heart, but did not understand her need to wear the red ribbon.

    After many years, Bill had an idea. “Our anniversary is coming up. I will buy Sally a beautiful necklace. She will take off that old red ribbon so she can wear the beautiful necklace!”

    Their anniversary came. Bill took Sally to a fancy restaurant overlooking Central Park. They had a delicious meal.

    Then Bill gave Sally a velvet box with a beautiful diamond necklace in it. She opened it, smiled, and tears came to her eyes. Bill put the necklace around her neck and started to take off the red ribbon.

    Sally stopped him. She said, “I must never take off my red ribbon!” Bill sat back in his seat with a huff. He looked at Sally and shook his head.

    “I may never understand,” Bill said.

    Sally gently placed the diamond necklace back in the velvet box and closed the lid. “It is lovely, Bill. I will treasure it always,” she said. “But I must never take off my red ribbon.”

    “Why?” Bill asked, as he had for so many years.

    Sally smiled sadly and shook her head. She did not answer him.

    Late that night Bill was still awake. “I’ve loved Sally for more than twenty years. But she insists on wearing that horrible red ribbon around her neck. I think it’s about time I found out why.”

    Bill got out of bed and walked around to Sally’s side. Bill carefully pinched the ends of the bow on the ribbon. He began to slowly pull on the ribbon.

    The bow became smaller and smaller. The loops of the bow pulled through and only a half-knot was left.

    Bill slid his finger under the half-knot and tugged.

    ZIP! The red ribbon gave way.

    POP! Sally’s head came off. It rolled right to the floor, bouncing in the moonlight!

    One large tear fell from Sally’s eye.

    “I warned you!” she said.