I was a squirrel in my past life.

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Captain-Jack-Sparrow3, Oct 20, 2013.

  1. I was a frolicking flamingo in the pits of Africa. Showing my pinkness about, getting the ladies, doing the ladies ;), killing the la... I was on top of the world, or savannah really. Until a hungry transsexual lion came. He was doing what transsexual lions do, you know, things... Then he pounces! Bites my neck, I basically automatically die with my skinny ass neck snapped like a damn twig. You know, with all this evolution bullshit you'd think flamingos would evolve to thicken their scrawny ass necks... Next thing I know, I spawn as a human male. With random urges to beat off, watch people doing their do, eating junk, and lusting over chicks I see on the street wearing yoga pants. I wonder what my next life will be. Hopefully a chick, even a turtle, they get it on too ;).
     
  2. I almost laughed at that. Give me thirty beers and you'll get a chuckle.
     
  3. Yoga pants FTW