Boobookiti and Omar Please no personal attacks boo hun, he is entitled to his opinion and does have a valid point. But i am not asking the game or a mechanical device. I am asking the people that play the game. Just as u are giving me advice by commenting on this thread, you are participating in it. I am willing to draw on the wealth of knowledge that is possibly at my finger tips, very much the same if i was to search google. Thanks to everyone, these have been great, if u still have more ideas i would very much like to hear them.
I'd say observe the child and watch to see what he/she values the most as each child responds to things differently. I was never a disruptive child, my mom spanked me once and I wouldn't repeat the same action again as I hated spankings. My brother on the other hand never responded well to spankings or timeouts. But his video games he truly valued. So taking them away from him was pure torture. My sister valued friends, so being restricted from going outside, social media etc. or "bonding with mom" was her way to understand to make better choices, and respect rules. As a parent now, I try to use all aspects of discipline so my son can understand that there are consequences for his actions, good or bad, and he will he rewarded accordingly. I may mention as well they we do not give children the credit for the knowledge they do possess. That being said, they learn very early on in life when we are stressed, annoyed, mad, sad, etc. If you let a child know that what they are doing upsets you, they will continue it just to retrieve a reaction or attention. For example, I have a cousin, every time he doesn't gets his way, he screams to the top of his lungs. It is very painful to the ears, yet he will continue scream unless a. he gets his way or b. We ignore him. As long as he knows he's annoying us he won't stop. Also, the parents should come together and work on how to raise and discipline the child together. You can't have one saying this is OK and this isn't, and another parent saying otherwise as it leads to ultimate confusion. And someone said talking, which I do agree with, some children need to be understood and lashing out is their way of communicating, let them know you're there for them and are help to help. They may not confess to a counselor as they may feel the counselor does not know them or understand them. It takes time to grow to a counselor and express to them your true feelings. My mom was always the best person to go to, I hated counseling.
You said the child has many issues. The child should probably be in counseling. Not just rhe child, but all those raising him should be part of the process as well.
Young kids in a split home often feel powerless and lost between two norms that they have to adapt to and act out. If outside activities are an option try karate. ? They teach about respect and self discipline and when it's appropriate to use physical force and when it isn't. It helps to develop self confidence making them feel more secure in whatever situation. Also if there is violence in the other household it could give him self defense skills should he ever need them. Best of luck to you.
Well hire a nanny. Go get your nails/hair did. Let the nanny raise your children. Boom little angel slush pups.
Im gonna take some from how I grew up and with my sister n Nessa. Seeing as I had 2 homes & also my step bros did too. Now unfortunately my daddy corrected us kids by using the belt mostly. As we got older he had to change ways of punishment tho. Seeing as to us kids eh 5min of pain then go about your day was nothing. So this part may work for you. And we use this on Nessa besides just getting her butt smacked. Granted she's only 3 but we don't have major issues with her. Taking away things that are fun to a child. Nessa hates anything that is like a time out chair. Hell us kids used to hate standing in a corner for 15-30mins depending on what we did. Time out means you can't do anything. So no getting up, no talking, nor moving much. My daddy wouldn't let us watch TV, go play outside, call friends, nor stay up late. If we got grounded it was do your homework, eat, shower, chorus, bed. No games!! Now ofc we could do anything at our moms but daddy had us for the most part. If my mom wasn't on page with him he had meetings with her in a public place. Find a middle ground to talk to the other parent bcuz in the end your punishments can turn out to be nothing if the other parent gives in. If the middle ground doesn't work try to involve maybe someone from the school. My daddy had to do this with one of my step bros dads. He gave him everything and let him do whatever. Tbh belt never worked for Chris so daddy used to make him hold himself up in a push up position for 10-15min. Only way Chris would do as told. Main important thing that I believe helped us kids & even Nessa as young as she is still picks up and learns. Talk with your kids after a punishment. They know what is wrong and right after so long. Make sure you are calm when doing this. Be level with the child. Don't stand over them. They need the loving parent at the same time. Ask them why they think they got punished. Then explain to them why they were punished. Granted this is up to you how to bring up your child. All kids learn punishment definitely tho. My bro was his games, sis was friends so no internet or phone, me it was my music. Mike my step bro was friends, step bro Chris only learned through types of pain. Nothing too harsh tho. I mean yea he cried holding himself up but nothing killer.
Reading through the comments... it seems as if the other party is the cause/ irresponsible side. I suggest you talk to whoever is taking care of your child and let them understand that you want what's best for your child and that this will/will not be tolerated. Make sure they know your trying to help your child. Another viable option is to basically win the childs full custody. I don't know your situation, I can only think of two parents that have divorced and are both seeing their kid. But I don't know.
Most places don't care as long as the child has its needs taken care of and the living conditions are up to code. Not unless the parent can be found unfit. Chris's daddy basically sounds like the other parent that Rude is dealing with. My step ma nor my daddy could do anything. Most courts don't care. Bcuz its just a punishment issue.
I agree with all the other advice about using positive reinforcement rather than punishment and to channel energy into extra curricular activities, however. I'm going to assume that the other household your child is encountering is the other parent, and if so and if they are encouraging and or participating in violence while around the child id suggest getting ahold of a lawyer. I don't know you, I don't know where you live or your situation but I am a mom and I would never want to send my child into a situation where they're learning these types of behaviors. Obviously whatever is going on is detrimental to the child's education and then in itself is enough. If communication with the other household is an issue you may just need court appointed mediation. Again, I'm making an assumption from what you've told us and I could be completely off base.