Guide to All the Jobs of PimD

Mcnef · Jun 4, 2015

MB I had done a few rounds with jobs previously completed. Excellent guide!

Prettlier · Jun 8, 2015

Thank you. This really helped!

NeckRomancer2 · Jun 8, 2015

Awesome

Tokki · Jun 8, 2015

Mr-Strikes said:

Guide to All the Jobs of PIMD

JOBS:

#1. Job Title: New Party
Description: You've heard there is a party at Delta Lota Kappa. Maybe you van sell this information to the freshman.
Money Earned: 66-100
Success Message: Haha, they bought it. You earned yourself some cash.
Failure Message: Doesn't look like anyone to pay for this news.
% gained per success: 50%
# of successes to complete job: 2
# of successes so far: 2

#2. Job Title: Tutoring
Description: Maybe you can make a little extra money tutoring some of the jocks.
Money Earned: 133-200
Success Message: Looks like your student figured out that the world wasn't flat. Nice work.
Failure Message: Jock failed his exam. Who would've guessed Rome isn't in Milwaukee?
% gained per success: 34%
# of successes to complete job: 3
# of successes so far: 5

#3. Job Title: Lawn Mowing
Description: Sun, grass what's not to like about doing a mowing job. Make some extra cash.
Money Earned: 133-200
Success Message: The old lady's lawn you mowed watched you the entire time and gave a great tip.
Failure Message: You ran over the flowers. Obviously you don't understand the complexity of mowing.
% gained per success: 25%
# of successes to complete job: 4
# of successes so far: 9

#4. Job Title: Try out for the Team
Description: The football team is looking for players. I hear they give out a bonus if you make the cut.
Money Earned: 800-1,200
Success Message: Sweet! All it took was 4 injuries, but you made it!
Failure Message: Wow, who could have guessed you had to be fit. Maybe try the cheerleading team next.
% gained per success: 34%
# of successes to complete job: 3
# of successes so far: 12

#5. Job Title: Food Run
Description: Some people need you to make a food run for their party.
Money Earned: 1,250-1,750
Success Message: It looks like they were drunk when they were reimbursing you, you made some extra cash.
Failure Message: Wow, they reimbursed you the EXACT amount. Nothing for gas either.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 22

!Level 1 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#6. Job Title: Sign up for Class
Description: Sign up for some classes and make your parents think your learning.
Money Earned: 1,525-1,575
Success Message: Looks like there was an accounting error, you got a partial refund.
Failure Message: Wow, they really just take your money and send you on your way.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 32

#7. Job Title: Note Taking
Description: One of your classmates needs you to take notes. I smell cash!
Money Earned: 800-2,400
Success Message: Nice! you were going to take notes anyways and you got money for it.
Failure Message: Okay, the fact that your writing was compared to ancient cave drawings is a bad thing.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 37

#8. Job Title: Grandma's Gift
Description: A package arrived in the mail... Looks like it's from Grandma!
Money Earned: 1,550-1,750
Success Message: Grandma sent some money. Oh how we love grandma!
Failure Message: It's just junk mail. Doh!
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 47

#9. Job Title: Home Chores
Description: Seems like your parents have a few chores for you back home. It's go time!
Money Earned: 2,000-12,000
Success Message: Nice! You found some cash while cleaning the coach.
Failure Message: Too bad doing work for family gets you nothing.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 52

#10. Job Title: Frosh Week
Description: Some of the local Greek houses are recruiting. Sign up now.
Money Earned: 7,200-7,800
Success Message: You signed the form and get free pizza and coupons... living the Dream!
Failure Message: Wow, you got turned down by the lamest frat house... How do you feel about that?
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 72

!Level 2 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#11. Job Title: Fight the Mascot
Description: It's the playoffs and the college mascot is looking for a fight. Take one for the team!
Money Earned: 5,000-11,000
Success Message: You showed that bird who's boss! Time to parade the beaten mascot around campus.
Failure Message: Ouch! Didn't expect the mascot to be a pro fighter. Run and hide in your dorm room!
% gained per success: 25%
# of successes to complete job: 4
# of successes so far: 76

#12. Job Title: Team Sugar Mama
Description: The team needs new jerseys and they are looking to you to seduce a sugar mama!
Money Earned: 8,000-9,000
Success Message: Cha-ching! Thanks to your "efforts" the team has new jerseys and new equipment. Go Team!
Failure Message: Didn't think she was on the board of directors! Perhaps a bake sale?
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 81

#13. Job Title: Food for Thought
Description: The club is having its first meeting. Are you able to score some food?
Money Earned: 8,500-8,600
Success Message: Good Call on the greasy fried chicken! Those students were so hungry!
Failure Message: Uhh gross! Did you expect students to get excited with a large bag of spinach?
% gained per success: 25%
# of successes to complete job: 4
# of successes so far: 85

#14. Job Title: Homework Help
Description: It looks like your friends aren't doing so well in class. Help them with some of your answers.
Money Earned: 8,000-9,200
Success Message: There is noting like a little bit of bribery to show you their appreciation.
Failure Message: Ouch, seems the teacher caught on and docked both of your grades.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 92

#15. Job Title: Lab Subject
Description: You see a flyer looking for test subjects. Offering cash and mild chance of side effects.
Money Earned: 8,500-8,900
Success Message: You got your cash and only a mild tick. Good work.
Failure Message: You failed the simple test of filling out your name. No cash for you.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 99
*You receive 7,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Note*

#16. Job Title: Group Project
Description: Your group project is struggling. Put in some crazy hours and see if it pays off.
Money Earned: 8,000-9,600
Success Message: Seems the group got you a little gift of appreciation for all the hours you put in.
Failure Message: All that work and your group still failed... Nice one Einstein!
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 109

#17. Job Title: Club of the Year
Description: The student council is awarding the club of the year with extra spending money.
Money Earned: 7,000-11,000
Success Message: We won! It's good no one knows that you are dating the student council president.
Failure Message: We lost to the math club! I mean, they do homework for FUN! Better luck next time.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 119

#18. Job Title: Coach Little League Team
Description: Your community baseball team is looking for a coach. Can u be the leader they seek?
Money Earned: 9,000-10,000
Success Message: Coach you did it! The community is really proud and have named a street after you!
Failure Message: Those who can't play, coach. Apparently you can't coach either!
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 129

#19. Job Title: ID Guy
Description: You met this guys who says he can make fake IDs. Maybe he can get one for you and your friends?
Money Earned: 9,500-10,500
Success Message: Wow, looks just like the real thing. You're going to make good use of this.
Failure Message: Ouch. A kid and a crayon could have made a better ID. Too bad.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 139
*You receive 7,500 cash*

#20. Job Title: Missing Jersey
Description: You lost your jersey at the party last nice. You need to borrow one for tonight's game.
Money Earned: 12,200-12,900
Success Message: This might be your lucky jersey. You made the winning shot and got a date with the cheerleader
Failure Message: The smell of your unwashed jersey you unconscious during the game.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 149

#21. Job Title: ID the I'D Guy
Description: Seems like the campus police are offering an award if you turn in the I'D guy. Do it!
Money Earned: 13,000-13,700
Success Message: Wow, what an award. You can buy yourself some serious amounts of macaroni and cheese.
Failure Message: By reward, they meant a coupon for laundry. Uber lame.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes needed to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 169

#22. Job Title: Private Time
Description: Your roommate wants some "alone time" in the dorm...
Money Earned: 13,400-14,900
Success Message: You got some extra beer money as a token of appreciation.
Failure Message: You come back to a really, Really, REALLY disgusting room.
% gained per success: 13%
# of successes to complete job: 8
# of successes so far: 177

#23. Job Title: Answers! Get your Answers!
Description: You sneak into the professors office and steal the answer key. Try selling the key for some extra cash!
Money Earned: 14,000-16,000
Success Message: You should do this more often. You made enough Money to quit your lame pizza delivery job.
Failure Message: The professor outsmarted the entire class by creating a fake answer key. Doh.
% gained per success: 13%
# of successes to complete job: 8
# of successes so far: 185

#24. Job Title: Organize a Study Group
Description: You've seen that hottie in your class. Organize a study group and get closer to them.
Money Earned: 14,800-16,700
Success Message: Nice moves. You now have a date, and you helped improved their IQ!
Failure Message: Who knew they didn't like studying and just wanted to party. Better luck next time.
% gained per success: 13%
# of successes needed to complete job: 8
# of successes so far: 193

#25. Job Title: Help New Roommate Move In
Description: You've got a new roommate! Help him move his stuff in.
Money Earned: 15,700-17,500
Success Message: You moved his stuff in record time, and got a free lunch out of it!
Failure Message: While moving his bed you discovered a huge stain on it. Your face was pressed against it for 20 minutes. Sadness.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 200

!Level 3 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#26. Job Title: Throw the Game
Description: A rich student has offered you money to throw tonight's basketball game.
Money Earned: 16,500-18,200
Success Message: You decided to play fair and win! You go looking for the rich kid and take his money anyway. Talk about a win-win situation!
Failure Message: You decided to play fair and still lost. You should've taken the cash.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 207

#27. Job Title: Clean the Kitchen
Description: It's time to clean up the mess in your dorm's kitchen.
Money Earned: 17,400-19,000
Success Message: You cashed in all the empty beer bottles at the recycling center. Score!
Failure Message: "Ah, so that's where the are coming from."
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 214

#28. Job Title: Spike the Water Cooler
Description: Your team is getting crushed. Add "magic ingredients" to the other team's water cooler.
Money Earned: 18,200-19,800
Success Message: Victory is sweet. Even if it means the other team has urgent bowel movements.
Failure Message: The other team's water boy found you and beat you up. Who knew he would be so strong?
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 221

#29. Job Title: Band Practice
Description: You've heard that playing music impresses your crush. Sign up for the band!
Money Earned: 19,100-20,500
Success Message: Not only did you woo your crush, but you've earned a cash from a music scholarship!
Failure Message: "Go on a date with you Haven't you heard? I don't want to be seen with a band geek!"
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 228

#30. Job Title: Pump that Iron
Description: It's time to go to the gym to work out. Toned abs, here we come!
Money Earned: 19,900-21,300
Success Message: You are the pinnacle of human fitness. Good job!
Failure Message: You decide to leave when you see a 5 year old lifting weights heavier than you.
% gained per success: 18%
# of successes to complete job: 6
# of successes so far: 234

#31. Job Title: Sell Furniture on the Internet
Description: Time to get rid of your dusty furniture. Try to sell it on the internet!
Money Earned: 20,700-22,100
Success Message: Sweet! You got your cash and got rid of crappy furniture. That was easy.
Failure Message: You need to go to the police station to get a restraining order for the serial killer who came to visit.
% gained per success: 18%
# of successes to complete job: 6
# of successes so far: 240

#32. Job Title: Team Fundraiser
Description: The team needs money money to travel for the championship game. Bake sale!
Money Earned: 20,700-23,800
Success Message: You sold enough cookies to travel first class. Girl scouts got nothing on you!
Failure Message: You need to raise more money because you ate all the cookies. Good job, jerk.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 245
*You receive 11,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Note*

#33. Job Title: Chores?!
Description: Your parents called. Mom wants you to come home and do the dishes.
Money Earned: 22,400-23,700
Success Message: After doing the chores, you eat an amazing dinner and get your laundry done for free. Boo yah!
Failure Message: "When your done with the dishes, don't forget to scrub the bathroom toilets."
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 250

#34. Job Title: Missing Mascot
Description: The team mascot is missing. It's your time to shine!
Money Earned: 22,600-25,100
Success Message: You put on the mascot outfit and get the crowd moving. Nice moves!
Failure Message: Ouch! That's what happens when you try a triple backflip off a trampoline without practice.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 257

#35. Job Title: Pledge for a Club
Description: Some clubs are accepting new members. Apply now!
Money Earned: 24,100-25,200
Success Message: You got in and won a lousy gift certificate. Maybe you should apply to a REAL club.
Failure Message: You got rejected. Perhaps you should try to join a REAL club?
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 264
*You receive 11,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Note*[/i

#36. Job Title: Statue Bandit
Description: Steal the school statue from a rival college.
Money Earned: 31,700-33,100
Success Message: Your antics have earned you the respect and admiration of the students.
Failure Message: Busted! Time to go home and nurse those two black eyes.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 274

#37. Job Title: Buy Groceries
Description: It's time to buy groceries for you and your roommate.
Money Earned: 39,300-41,000
Success Message: Your roommate gives you a little extra cash for your efforts.
Failure Message: Your roomate eats all of the food in 30 minutes. "Hungry!!!"
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 284

#38. Job Title: Bribe Resident Advisor
Description: Your RA is giving you trouble for throwing a loud party. Get rid of him!
Money Earned: 47,000-48,800
Success Message: Turns out the RA was just sad you didn't send him an invite, and pays YOU to attend!
Failure Message: "NO PARTY FOR YOU!" - who knew the RA was such a prude?
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 304

#39. Job Title: Track and Field
Description: It's time to practice for the upcoming race.
Money Earned: 47,700-52,700
Success Message: You won the race! Good job, champ!
Failure Message: You realize that the only sport you're good at is drinking beer.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 324
*You receive 24,000 cash*

#40. Job Title: Beer Pong Contest
Description: It's time for the annual campus-wide beer pong tournament! Will you rise to the challenge?
Money Earned: 48,900-54,000
Success Message: There's nothing like a giant beer pong trophy to impress your friends. Oh wait, prize money...even better.
Failure Message: Your team got beat by two freshman who made fun of your mother. Sadness.
% gained per success: 25%
# of successes to complete job: 4
# of successes so far: 328

!Lvl 4 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#41. Job Title: Sell Junk Food During Ban
Description: Administration has banned junk food after reading a scary new article. Opportunity awaits!
Money Earned: 49,500-56,400
Success Message: Good job! You've created a business empire!
Failure Message: You ate your own supply, and owe money to the scary looking guys who sold you Twinkies.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 333

#42. Job Title: Freshman Hazing
Description: It's time to haze the freshman. This will be fun!
Money Earned: 51,000-58,000
Success Message: You dump the frosh in a bathtub full of jello. Now they fear and respect you.
Failure Message: You screamed like a little girl when you saw a spider in front of the frosh. You'll never live it down.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 340

#43. Job Title: Call Center
Description: Get a part-time job at the local customer support call center.
Money Earned: 52,000-59,000
Success Message: You scored some extra cash. Boo yah!
Failure Message: You got caught downloading "movie files". Fired!
% gained per success: 12%
# of successes to complete job: 9
# of successes so far: 349
*You receive 26,000 cash*

#44. Job Title: Party Time
Description: Try to get into the local nightclub with your fake ID.
Money Earned: 53,000-60,000
Success Message: You got in and managed to learn some cool dance-off moves!
Failure Message: Wow, bouncers can throw people really far.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 359

#45. Job Title: New Credit Card
Description: You're running low on beer money. Time to sign up for new credit card!
Money Earned: 54,000-65,000
Success Message: Score! You've got cash and got a great deal with ONLY a 848.22% interest rate!
Failure Message: "Sir, with your credit score you are only eligible for a pre-paid credit card."
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 369

#46. Job Title: Old Folks Home Volunteer
Description: Volunteer at the senior citizens center down the street.
Money Earned: 60,000-70,000
Success Message: You're a hit with the residents and received some generous tips!
Failure Message: Mrs. McDonelly wants you to clean her bedpan. FML.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 379

#47. Job Title: Club Treasurer
Description: You are smart with money and the club is putting you in charge. Do you accept?
Money Earned: 64,000-75,000
Success Message: You managed to stretch our shoestring budget for the entire year! Good job!
Failure Message: Spending the clubâs budget on beer will not be accepted. You are being audited.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 399
*You receive 32,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Notes*

#48. Job Title: Blood Donation
Description: Donate your blood for some extra cash.
Money Earned: 68,000-76,000
Success Message: You feel a little woozy, but you got a free cookie and some extra cash!
Failure Message: Your blood was taken from a sparkly guy named Edward with fangs who didn't even work at the donation center.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 419

!Lvl 5 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#49. Job Title: Midterm Madness
Description: It's time to study for midterm exams.
Money Earned: 70,000-80,000
Success Message: You aced the test and got some cash from your parents as a reward!
Failure Message: Not only did you sleep in and arrive at the exam late, but you forgot to put on pants.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 439

#50. Job Title: Keg Stand Competition
Description: Theres a keg stand competition happening at the party. It's go time!
Money Earned: 80,000-85,000
Success Message: You can chug with the best of them. Enjoy your trophy and prize money, and walk the walk of a champion.
Failure Message: You fell on your head while doing a keg stand and got knocked unconscious.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 444

#51. Job Title: Sell Textbooks Online
Description: Sell your textbooks online at your favorite auction site, C-Bay.
Money Earned: 85,000-90,000
Success Message: Good work. You've got enough cash to buy pizza for dinner tonight.
Failure Message: Too bad you don't know how to use a computer, and sold your textbooks for free.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 451

#52. Job Title: Paint a Mural
Description: Help your crush paint a mural for the university.
Money Earned: 90,000-95,000
Success Message: Your artsy nature impresses your crush. You've got a hot date!
Failure Message: Painting private parts on the walls does not impress your crush. Forever alone...
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 458
*You receive 45,000 cash*

#53. Job Title: Download Media
Description: You need to download some "movie files" onto your computer.
Money Earned: 95,000-99,000
Success Message: The download finishes quickly and your roomate is nowhere to be found! Viewing time!
Failure Message: "Whoah, hey guys! Look at what's being downloaded! LOL!" - Busted!
% gained per success: 13%
# of successes to complete job: 8
# of successes so far: 466

#54. Job Title: Internship
Description: You got a job as a college intern at the local marketing firm.
Money Earned: 99,000-105,000
Success Message: Congratulations! You're a pro at making and delivering coffee! The sky's the limit!
Failure Message: You realized that it's an unpaid internship job. FML.
% gained per success: 12%
# of successes to complete job: 9
# of successes so far: 475

#55. Job Title: Party Planner
Description: It's time to throw the most epic party ever. Are you ready?
Money Earned: 105,000-110,000
Success Message: The party was a huge hit! It's going to take you three days to clean up. Good work.
Failure Message: "Um...how did that get onto the ceiling?"
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 485

#56. Job Title: Prank Rival Club
Description: A rival club is trying to muscle yours off campus. Show them who's boss!
Money Earned: 109,000-112,000
Success Message: Your rivals are in awe of how you managed to get their cars encased in blocks of ice.
Failure Message: The rival club was one step ahead of you, and pranked you first.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 495

#57. Job Title: Walk of Shame
Description: You had a memorable night out. Sneak home without anyone noticing!
Money Earned: 112,000-116,000
Success Message: You get back to your dorm unnoticed. Good work, champ.
Failure Message: Your parents decided to pay you a surprise visit, and have been waiting outside your dorm.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 515
*You receive 58,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Note*

#58. Job Title: Go to Rock Concert
Description: Your favorite band is playing in town tonight.
Money Earned: 113,000-124,000
Success Message: You get to meet the band and go backstage. Being a groupie is fun!
Failure Message: You watch the band with binoculars from the nosebleed seats. FML.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 535

#59. Job Title: And Who Are You?
Description: Awesome: You wake up next to a total hottie. Not so awesome: You have no idea what their name is. Battle stations!
Money Earned: 115,000-125,000
Success Message: You discreetly look them up online on your phone and look like a saint. They're so embarrassed that they don't know your name that they buy breakfast.
Failure Message: Nobody is named "Mulva". Try harder.
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 560
*You receive 10,000,000 cash and 4 Doctor's Notes*

#60. Job Title: Panty Raid
Description: What better way to prank the dorm across the campus? Doesn't even matter, you're loaded!
Money Earned: 132,000-140,000
Success Message: Not only do you ninja your way in and out completely undetected, but it turns out there's a huge market for your brand new stash online! Ca-ching!
Failure Message: You try to escape clambering along the laundry lines and fall in a broken, tangled heap on the ground. Hope you opted into the student dental plan!
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 594

#61. Job Title: The Centurion
Description: One hundred shots of beer. One hundred minutes. And just for fun, no bathroom breaks.
Money Earned: 145,000-159,000
Success Message: 99... 100! You can barely see straight, your bladder is ready to burst and all of your friends passed out, but you won! Quick, find some place to curl up and die.
Failure Message: You gag on the first shot, choke on the second and can't keep down the third. My baby sister can out drink you and she's a freaking baby.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 644

#62. Job Title: Vegas Road Trip
Description: Your buddies have a great idea: road trip to Vegas! Pack your lucky rabbit's foot!
Money Earned: 148,000-188,000
Success Message: Turns out obsessively watching competitive poker instead of sleeping has its benefits. In fact, you win so much the bouncers start to look at you funny... Whelp, 'bout time to hit the old dusty trail...
Failure Message: The last thing you can remember is betting it all on black. You wake up married, badly burnt and nursing the hangover that ends civilization.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 744

#63. Job Title: Skinny Dipping
Description: Your crush suggests a late night skinny dip. Hope you've been doing your crunches!
Money Earned: 180,000-188,000
Success Message: Not only do you execute a perfect swan dive into the lake, you look damn sexy doing it. Score!
Failure Message: You slip trying to take off your pants and ram head first into a support beam and step on a rusty nail. You're spending the night in the hospital.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 844

#64. Job Title: Hunger Games
Description: One of your dorm mates made brownies, and shared with you! But now your still hungry.. really hungry...
Money Earned: 150,000-250,000
Success Message: Miraculously, you stumble across a hot dog eating competition down the block and beat everyone by a huge margin!
Failure Message: Nobody has been shopping in a while and you end up eating a box of dog treats that have been behind the sink since before you moved in. Classy.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 944

#65. Job Title: Ethnical Dilemma
Description: You're going to fail your Ethnics class- good thing you have some pictures your prof wouldn't want in circulation...
Money Earned: 230,000-290,000
Success Message: Your prof agrees to pass you and even throws in some money to make sure you shut up. Ethics is fun!
Failure Message: Photoshopped! Not only is your prof in the clear, but you're definitely going to fail now. When was the drop out date again?
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 969
*You receive 2 Doctor's Notes*

#66. Job Title: V (For Victory) Ball
Description: It's time to dig deep: the volleyball team has made finals, but the need you to fill in for an injured member.
Money Earned: 310,000-330,000
Success Message: Bump and spike! You hit the ball so hard it knocks out the guy who tries to return it. Your opponent's morale crumbles like a sand castle in the wind.
Failure Message: You go for an epic dive and end up leaving half of your skin scraped across the ground. Now you know what an orange peel feels like.
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 1,003

#67. Job Title: uTube Video
Description: If a sneezing panda can do it, so can you. It's time to go viral!
Money Earned: 340,000-420,000
Success Message: It turns out the internet DOES want another mash-up/song parody/dance/cat video. I CAN HAS A MILLION VIEWS? Yes, yes you can.
Failure Message: You become the number one search result for "Epic Fail". Two thousand dislikes.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 1,053

#68. Job Title: The Last (Keg) Stand
Description: Terence from Alpha Sigma thinks he's the king of the keg stand. You were doing the keg crawl when you were a baby. It's ON.
Money Earned: 400,000-480,000
Success Message: Not only do you pull off a five minute, un-assisted keg stand, but a scout from "The Solar Circus" gives you a grant for your acrobatic prowess. Merci!
Failure Message: Unbeknownst to you, Terence drinks Canadian beer. The high alcohol content takes you by surprise and your keg stand becomes a keg concussion.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,153

#69. Job Title: Occupy PIMD Protest
Description: The PIMD offices have become surrounded by hippies demanding equality between clubs. Clear them out!
Money Earned: 625,000-675,000
Success Message: Using intelligently constructed and well argued points, you convince them to disperse. Also, bats. A lot of burly guys with bats.
Failure Message: You have no defences against yet another round of "" played on acoustic guitar or the general lack of bathing. Retreat! Regroup!
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,253
*You receive 100,000,000 cash and 8 Doctor's Notes*

#70. Job Title: Water Spectator Sports
Description: Finally, it's pool season! Time to put on some swim gear, lounge around the poolside and best of all, take in the sights.
Money Earned: 708,000-808,000
Success Message: Not only do you catch some amazing sights, but you snap some photos that will be worth cash to the geeks who can't brave the sunshine.
Failure Message: Waaaay too young. Seriously, hit the showers and think about your life.... and phone a lawyer.
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 1,278

#71. Job Title: Drunk Dial
Description: You struck out at the bar tonight and you're drunk and lonely. You have a cell phone. This will probably not end well.
Money Earned: 1,000,000-1,400,000
Success Message: You accidentally call your best friend who promises to pay you if you don't call your ex. That's what friends are for!
Failure Message: You leave a rambling message to a crush who friend-zoned you. It goes on the internet and your mom gets it forwarded in a chain mail. Oops.
% gained per success: 3
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 1,312

#73. Job Title: It's In The Bag
Description: Tim has been going around smacking people in the junk. It's funny, but he's taken it to far. Your mission is to stop him.
Money Earned: 1,100,000-1,400,000
Success Message: *KER-SLAP-CRUCH*! Even with the no slap-backs rule, I don't think you have to worry about him for a while. Is-is he crying? Yeah, totally crying.
Failure Message: The best defense is a good offence. Remember that while you lie writing on the ground, waiting for the swelling to go down.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 1,362

#74. Job Title: Crush the Drunk Mile
Description: When you weren't looking your ride left the party without you! It's gonna be a long walk...
Money Earned: 1,400,000-1,600,000
Success Message: You stumble across a car full of hotties looking for an after hours party. Not only do you show them a good time, but they pay for your booze. Smooth!
Failure Message: Fives minutes into the walk, it starts raining. Then it starts hailing. You lose a shoe. A dog chases you. You fall into a vat of animal fat. It's not your best night.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,462

#75. Job Title: Dutch Baking
Description: You've got company in bed and everything has been going great. You probably shouldn't have eaten all those tacos...
Money Earned: 1,200,000-2,200,000
Success Message: You pull up the covers and cook a delightful dutch treat. They laugh, but also give you money so that you never, ever do that again.
Failure Message: Instead of quiet but deadly you get loud and wet. Errr... hope you weren't even planning on seeing them again.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,562
*You receive 2 Doctor's Notes*

#76. Job Title: Internet Meme Pickup
Description: Your friend bets you that you can't get a number while making a reference to your favorite internet videos.
Money Earned: 1,000,000-2,800,000
Success Message: You manage to find the one non-ironic Rick Astley fan in the club and you hit it off. You're not sure if this is a good thing, but you totally won the bet!
Failure Message: While your dance floor rendition of the majesty that is the Star Battles Kid is eerily accurate, your intended audience just thinks you're having a seizure.
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 1,587

#77. Job Title: Card Puncher
Description: Your date has been waiting their whole life for "the one". You don't know if that's you, but you're willing to fake it.
Money Earned: 1,900,000-2,100,000
Success Message: After charming the pants off them they reveal that they're engaged to "the one" and pay you to keep this secret. Now THAT's a notch on the bedpost.
Failure Message: There's a reason you don't get a first year med student to perform heart surgery. You walk away with some new bruises and bad memories.
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 1,621

#78. Job Title: Copypaster
Description: You've got 20 minutes before your essay is due and you didn't get beyond the title page. Thank god for the internet!
Money Earned: 2,000,000-2,200,000
Success Message: If you had worked as hard writing your essay as you did hastily re-wording and find-replacing the one you found online, you would have been set.
Failure Message: Most essays don't have a URL printed at the bottom of each page. Better have a good excuse at your academic misconduct review board!
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 1,671

#79. Job Title: Argument Club
Description: You finally get invited to the top-secret Argument Club. It's your first night, so you HAVE to argue!
Money Earned: 2,500,000-3,000,000
Success Message: Not only do your arguments prove incredible persuasive, but you manage to take a leadership position in Argument Club and rake in some sweet kickbacks. Your modern day ennui is sated!
Failure Message: You break the 1st rule of Argument Club: Talk about Argument Club. How else can you start arguments? Eat this meatloaf and think about what you did.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,771

#80. Job Title: The Play's The Thing
Description: The Drama Dept. needs a lead for their post-modern neo-classic deconstructionalist play of Romeo and Juliet.
Money Earned: 2,600,000-3,100,000
Success Message: Encore! You move the audience to tears with your performance! They throw flowers! They throw money! Totally worth the stress and throwing up backstage.
Failure Message: That was awful. You couldn't even remember your first... er... line? Good one Keanu.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,871
*You receive 5,000,000,000 cash and 10 Doctor's Notes*

#81. Job Title: Video Game Marathon
Description: Modern Guns: Honor! War! Duty! has been released. Time to head online and show the world your mad skills.
Money Earned: 2,900,000-3,100,000
Success Message: You snipe more headshots in an hour than a photographer does in a lifetime. Players band together to pay you off so they can play the game in peace.
Failure Message: The barely perceivable changes made between this game and last year's turn out to be a bit of a hurdle. Yeah, you're totally a noob.
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 1,896

#82. Job Title: Healthy Living
Description: A health code inspector is checking out your dorm and last night's party totally crashed the place. Quick,before he gets here!
Money Earned: 2,700,000-4,700,000
Success Message: By squeezing everything into a closet and a liberal application of anti-odor spray, you pass inspection. The building manager gives you some cash as thanks.
Failure Message: Even though you've named the mold growing in your room, it's no less deadly to your health. Time for a fumigation...
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 1,930

#83. Job Title: Over The Cap
Description: The brand new pilot course looks like a super easy A! It's also completely full. Time to charm your way in!
Money Earned: 4,000,000-4,800,000
Success Message: You not only get yourself into the class, but get the cap opened so some more students squeeze in as well. They toss you a few bucks in gratitude.
Failure Message: "C'mon... C'mon... COME ON!!!" turns out to be less than persuasive. Guess you'll have to actually TRY this term.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 1,980

#84. Job Title: Launch Day
Description: Your second favorite video game (after PIMD, obviously) launches today. Get in line to grab a copy!
Money Earned: 4,900,000-5,300,000
Success Message: You manage to grab an extra copy to sell online. The game paid for itself and then some!
Failure Message: Hours waiting in the freezing cold end with the store getting a "reduced delivery". How am I supposed to play this "store hold slip"? I can't! You suck!
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 2,080

#85. Job Title: Chicken Fit for a King
Description: It's Chicken Fingers day in the Cafeteria.
Money Earned: 5,000,000-6,000,000
Success Message: You get the last ones and sell some of them to hungry students at a markup! First you get the chicken, then you get the power, then you get the women...
Failure Message: You get the last chicken finger, but they're all out of honey dill sauce. That's practically a war crime.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 2,180
*You receive 8 Doctor's Notes*

#86. Job Title: Retaliation of the Nerds
Description: The nerd frat needs your help preforming to win the Greek Games. Well, they did get those viruses off your computer...
Money Earned: 6,500,000-6,900,000
Success Message: The world will never see another theremin solo of it's kind ever again. The nerds tearfully pay you for the beauty you've birthed into the world.
Failure Message: All of your electronic instruments end up blowing the power grid, disqualifying the nerds instantly. Smart move!
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 2,205

#87. Job Title: Edward 40 Hands
Description: You tape two 40 ounce bottles in each hand. You don't take them off until they've both been drunk. You try not to pass out. Begin!
Money Earned: 7,400,000-7,600,000
Success Message: In celebration of your victory you smash both bottles together attempting to clap for yourself. Blang!
Failure Message: You wake up with glass in every possible orifice. Yep, that one too. Get to a doctor already!
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 2,239

#88. Job Title: Hack Attack
Description: You attempt to beat the world record for longest continuous foot bag game- Only 69,812 more kicks to go!
Money Earned: 7,400,000-9,400,000
Success Message: Your leg threatens to fall off, but you do it, you beat the record, to the awe of... nobody. People feel bad and give you some money.
Failure Message: 1-2... Crud. 1-2-3... Crud. 1-2... CRAP! Don't worry champ, you'll get there.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 2,289

#89. Job Title: Joyful Club
Description: The campus glee club needs an extra singer ASAP, or they are going to lose sectionals. They'll even pay you if they place.
Money Earned: 7,300,000-11,300,000
Success Message: Years of singing in the shower finally pay off in this, your most glorious moment. But, since good things can't happen to the Glee club you only get 3rd.
Failure Message: Awful. You think a High C is a soft drink. You're just embarrassing yourself.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 2,389

#90. Job Title: Plank Power
Description: A context has been announced for the best planking picture- The winner gets cash! Time to rest those core muscles.
Money Earned: 8,200,000-12,200,000
Success Message: H-h-how did you even get up there? Better still, how did you get down?
Failure Message: It's not called planking when you're on the ground. That's called napping.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 2,489
*You receive 20,000,000,000 cash*

I didn't just post these to get moderator and I only deleted them in my rage yesterday and I apologize. I acted childish and it's unacceptable.
Click to expand...

ran_-dom · Jun 8, 2015

Mr-Strikes said:

Guide to All the Jobs of PIMD

JOBS:

#1. Job Title: New Party
Description: You've heard there is a party at Delta Lota Kappa. Maybe you van sell this information to the freshman.
Money Earned: 66-100
Success Message: Haha, they bought it. You earned yourself some cash.
Failure Message: Doesn't look like anyone to pay for this news.
% gained per success: 50%
# of successes to complete job: 2
# of successes so far: 2

#2. Job Title: Tutoring
Description: Maybe you can make a little extra money tutoring some of the jocks.
Money Earned: 133-200
Success Message: Looks like your student figured out that the world wasn't flat. Nice work.
Failure Message: Jock failed his exam. Who would've guessed Rome isn't in Milwaukee?
% gained per success: 34%
# of successes to complete job: 3
# of successes so far: 5

#3. Job Title: Lawn Mowing
Description: Sun, grass what's not to like about doing a mowing job. Make some extra cash.
Money Earned: 133-200
Success Message: The old lady's lawn you mowed watched you the entire time and gave a great tip.
Failure Message: You ran over the flowers. Obviously you don't understand the complexity of mowing.
% gained per success: 25%
# of successes to complete job: 4
# of successes so far: 9

#4. Job Title: Try out for the Team
Description: The football team is looking for players. I hear they give out a bonus if you make the cut.
Money Earned: 800-1,200
Success Message: Sweet! All it took was 4 injuries, but you made it!
Failure Message: Wow, who could have guessed you had to be fit. Maybe try the cheerleading team next.
% gained per success: 34%
# of successes to complete job: 3
# of successes so far: 12

#5. Job Title: Food Run
Description: Some people need you to make a food run for their party.
Money Earned: 1,250-1,750
Success Message: It looks like they were drunk when they were reimbursing you, you made some extra cash.
Failure Message: Wow, they reimbursed you the EXACT amount. Nothing for gas either.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 22

!Level 1 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#6. Job Title: Sign up for Class
Description: Sign up for some classes and make your parents think your learning.
Money Earned: 1,525-1,575
Success Message: Looks like there was an accounting error, you got a partial refund.
Failure Message: Wow, they really just take your money and send you on your way.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 32

#7. Job Title: Note Taking
Description: One of your classmates needs you to take notes. I smell cash!
Money Earned: 800-2,400
Success Message: Nice! you were going to take notes anyways and you got money for it.
Failure Message: Okay, the fact that your writing was compared to ancient cave drawings is a bad thing.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 37

#8. Job Title: Grandma's Gift
Description: A package arrived in the mail... Looks like it's from Grandma!
Money Earned: 1,550-1,750
Success Message: Grandma sent some money. Oh how we love grandma!
Failure Message: It's just junk mail. Doh!
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 47

#9. Job Title: Home Chores
Description: Seems like your parents have a few chores for you back home. It's go time!
Money Earned: 2,000-12,000
Success Message: Nice! You found some cash while cleaning the coach.
Failure Message: Too bad doing work for family gets you nothing.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 52

#10. Job Title: Frosh Week
Description: Some of the local Greek houses are recruiting. Sign up now.
Money Earned: 7,200-7,800
Success Message: You signed the form and get free pizza and coupons... living the Dream!
Failure Message: Wow, you got turned down by the lamest frat house... How do you feel about that?
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 72

!Level 2 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#11. Job Title: Fight the Mascot
Description: It's the playoffs and the college mascot is looking for a fight. Take one for the team!
Money Earned: 5,000-11,000
Success Message: You showed that bird who's boss! Time to parade the beaten mascot around campus.
Failure Message: Ouch! Didn't expect the mascot to be a pro fighter. Run and hide in your dorm room!
% gained per success: 25%
# of successes to complete job: 4
# of successes so far: 76

#12. Job Title: Team Sugar Mama
Description: The team needs new jerseys and they are looking to you to seduce a sugar mama!
Money Earned: 8,000-9,000
Success Message: Cha-ching! Thanks to your "efforts" the team has new jerseys and new equipment. Go Team!
Failure Message: Didn't think she was on the board of directors! Perhaps a bake sale?
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 81

#13. Job Title: Food for Thought
Description: The club is having its first meeting. Are you able to score some food?
Money Earned: 8,500-8,600
Success Message: Good Call on the greasy fried chicken! Those students were so hungry!
Failure Message: Uhh gross! Did you expect students to get excited with a large bag of spinach?
% gained per success: 25%
# of successes to complete job: 4
# of successes so far: 85

#14. Job Title: Homework Help
Description: It looks like your friends aren't doing so well in class. Help them with some of your answers.
Money Earned: 8,000-9,200
Success Message: There is noting like a little bit of bribery to show you their appreciation.
Failure Message: Ouch, seems the teacher caught on and docked both of your grades.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 92

#15. Job Title: Lab Subject
Description: You see a flyer looking for test subjects. Offering cash and mild chance of side effects.
Money Earned: 8,500-8,900
Success Message: You got your cash and only a mild tick. Good work.
Failure Message: You failed the simple test of filling out your name. No cash for you.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 99
*You receive 7,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Note*

#16. Job Title: Group Project
Description: Your group project is struggling. Put in some crazy hours and see if it pays off.
Money Earned: 8,000-9,600
Success Message: Seems the group got you a little gift of appreciation for all the hours you put in.
Failure Message: All that work and your group still failed... Nice one Einstein!
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 109

#17. Job Title: Club of the Year
Description: The student council is awarding the club of the year with extra spending money.
Money Earned: 7,000-11,000
Success Message: We won! It's good no one knows that you are dating the student council president.
Failure Message: We lost to the math club! I mean, they do homework for FUN! Better luck next time.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 119

#18. Job Title: Coach Little League Team
Description: Your community baseball team is looking for a coach. Can u be the leader they seek?
Money Earned: 9,000-10,000
Success Message: Coach you did it! The community is really proud and have named a street after you!
Failure Message: Those who can't play, coach. Apparently you can't coach either!
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 129

#19. Job Title: ID Guy
Description: You met this guys who says he can make fake IDs. Maybe he can get one for you and your friends?
Money Earned: 9,500-10,500
Success Message: Wow, looks just like the real thing. You're going to make good use of this.
Failure Message: Ouch. A kid and a crayon could have made a better ID. Too bad.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 139
*You receive 7,500 cash*

#20. Job Title: Missing Jersey
Description: You lost your jersey at the party last nice. You need to borrow one for tonight's game.
Money Earned: 12,200-12,900
Success Message: This might be your lucky jersey. You made the winning shot and got a date with the cheerleader
Failure Message: The smell of your unwashed jersey you unconscious during the game.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 149

#21. Job Title: ID the I'D Guy
Description: Seems like the campus police are offering an award if you turn in the I'D guy. Do it!
Money Earned: 13,000-13,700
Success Message: Wow, what an award. You can buy yourself some serious amounts of macaroni and cheese.
Failure Message: By reward, they meant a coupon for laundry. Uber lame.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes needed to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 169

#22. Job Title: Private Time
Description: Your roommate wants some "alone time" in the dorm...
Money Earned: 13,400-14,900
Success Message: You got some extra beer money as a token of appreciation.
Failure Message: You come back to a really, Really, REALLY disgusting room.
% gained per success: 13%
# of successes to complete job: 8
# of successes so far: 177

#23. Job Title: Answers! Get your Answers!
Description: You sneak into the professors office and steal the answer key. Try selling the key for some extra cash!
Money Earned: 14,000-16,000
Success Message: You should do this more often. You made enough Money to quit your lame pizza delivery job.
Failure Message: The professor outsmarted the entire class by creating a fake answer key. Doh.
% gained per success: 13%
# of successes to complete job: 8
# of successes so far: 185

#24. Job Title: Organize a Study Group
Description: You've seen that hottie in your class. Organize a study group and get closer to them.
Money Earned: 14,800-16,700
Success Message: Nice moves. You now have a date, and you helped improved their IQ!
Failure Message: Who knew they didn't like studying and just wanted to party. Better luck next time.
% gained per success: 13%
# of successes needed to complete job: 8
# of successes so far: 193

#25. Job Title: Help New Roommate Move In
Description: You've got a new roommate! Help him move his stuff in.
Money Earned: 15,700-17,500
Success Message: You moved his stuff in record time, and got a free lunch out of it!
Failure Message: While moving his bed you discovered a huge stain on it. Your face was pressed against it for 20 minutes. Sadness.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 200

!Level 3 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#26. Job Title: Throw the Game
Description: A rich student has offered you money to throw tonight's basketball game.
Money Earned: 16,500-18,200
Success Message: You decided to play fair and win! You go looking for the rich kid and take his money anyway. Talk about a win-win situation!
Failure Message: You decided to play fair and still lost. You should've taken the cash.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 207

#27. Job Title: Clean the Kitchen
Description: It's time to clean up the mess in your dorm's kitchen.
Money Earned: 17,400-19,000
Success Message: You cashed in all the empty beer bottles at the recycling center. Score!
Failure Message: "Ah, so that's where the are coming from."
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 214

#28. Job Title: Spike the Water Cooler
Description: Your team is getting crushed. Add "magic ingredients" to the other team's water cooler.
Money Earned: 18,200-19,800
Success Message: Victory is sweet. Even if it means the other team has urgent bowel movements.
Failure Message: The other team's water boy found you and beat you up. Who knew he would be so strong?
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 221

#29. Job Title: Band Practice
Description: You've heard that playing music impresses your crush. Sign up for the band!
Money Earned: 19,100-20,500
Success Message: Not only did you woo your crush, but you've earned a cash from a music scholarship!
Failure Message: "Go on a date with you Haven't you heard? I don't want to be seen with a band geek!"
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 228

#30. Job Title: Pump that Iron
Description: It's time to go to the gym to work out. Toned abs, here we come!
Money Earned: 19,900-21,300
Success Message: You are the pinnacle of human fitness. Good job!
Failure Message: You decide to leave when you see a 5 year old lifting weights heavier than you.
% gained per success: 18%
# of successes to complete job: 6
# of successes so far: 234

#31. Job Title: Sell Furniture on the Internet
Description: Time to get rid of your dusty furniture. Try to sell it on the internet!
Money Earned: 20,700-22,100
Success Message: Sweet! You got your cash and got rid of crappy furniture. That was easy.
Failure Message: You need to go to the police station to get a restraining order for the serial killer who came to visit.
% gained per success: 18%
# of successes to complete job: 6
# of successes so far: 240

#32. Job Title: Team Fundraiser
Description: The team needs money money to travel for the championship game. Bake sale!
Money Earned: 20,700-23,800
Success Message: You sold enough cookies to travel first class. Girl scouts got nothing on you!
Failure Message: You need to raise more money because you ate all the cookies. Good job, jerk.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 245
*You receive 11,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Note*

#33. Job Title: Chores?!
Description: Your parents called. Mom wants you to come home and do the dishes.
Money Earned: 22,400-23,700
Success Message: After doing the chores, you eat an amazing dinner and get your laundry done for free. Boo yah!
Failure Message: "When your done with the dishes, don't forget to scrub the bathroom toilets."
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 250

#34. Job Title: Missing Mascot
Description: The team mascot is missing. It's your time to shine!
Money Earned: 22,600-25,100
Success Message: You put on the mascot outfit and get the crowd moving. Nice moves!
Failure Message: Ouch! That's what happens when you try a triple backflip off a trampoline without practice.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 257

#35. Job Title: Pledge for a Club
Description: Some clubs are accepting new members. Apply now!
Money Earned: 24,100-25,200
Success Message: You got in and won a lousy gift certificate. Maybe you should apply to a REAL club.
Failure Message: You got rejected. Perhaps you should try to join a REAL club?
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 264
*You receive 11,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Note*[/i

#36. Job Title: Statue Bandit
Description: Steal the school statue from a rival college.
Money Earned: 31,700-33,100
Success Message: Your antics have earned you the respect and admiration of the students.
Failure Message: Busted! Time to go home and nurse those two black eyes.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 274

#37. Job Title: Buy Groceries
Description: It's time to buy groceries for you and your roommate.
Money Earned: 39,300-41,000
Success Message: Your roommate gives you a little extra cash for your efforts.
Failure Message: Your roomate eats all of the food in 30 minutes. "Hungry!!!"
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 284

#38. Job Title: Bribe Resident Advisor
Description: Your RA is giving you trouble for throwing a loud party. Get rid of him!
Money Earned: 47,000-48,800
Success Message: Turns out the RA was just sad you didn't send him an invite, and pays YOU to attend!
Failure Message: "NO PARTY FOR YOU!" - who knew the RA was such a prude?
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 304

#39. Job Title: Track and Field
Description: It's time to practice for the upcoming race.
Money Earned: 47,700-52,700
Success Message: You won the race! Good job, champ!
Failure Message: You realize that the only sport you're good at is drinking beer.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 324
*You receive 24,000 cash*

#40. Job Title: Beer Pong Contest
Description: It's time for the annual campus-wide beer pong tournament! Will you rise to the challenge?
Money Earned: 48,900-54,000
Success Message: There's nothing like a giant beer pong trophy to impress your friends. Oh wait, prize money...even better.
Failure Message: Your team got beat by two freshman who made fun of your mother. Sadness.
% gained per success: 25%
# of successes to complete job: 4
# of successes so far: 328

!Lvl 4 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#41. Job Title: Sell Junk Food During Ban
Description: Administration has banned junk food after reading a scary new article. Opportunity awaits!
Money Earned: 49,500-56,400
Success Message: Good job! You've created a business empire!
Failure Message: You ate your own supply, and owe money to the scary looking guys who sold you Twinkies.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 333

#42. Job Title: Freshman Hazing
Description: It's time to haze the freshman. This will be fun!
Money Earned: 51,000-58,000
Success Message: You dump the frosh in a bathtub full of jello. Now they fear and respect you.
Failure Message: You screamed like a little girl when you saw a spider in front of the frosh. You'll never live it down.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 340

#43. Job Title: Call Center
Description: Get a part-time job at the local customer support call center.
Money Earned: 52,000-59,000
Success Message: You scored some extra cash. Boo yah!
Failure Message: You got caught downloading "movie files". Fired!
% gained per success: 12%
# of successes to complete job: 9
# of successes so far: 349
*You receive 26,000 cash*

#44. Job Title: Party Time
Description: Try to get into the local nightclub with your fake ID.
Money Earned: 53,000-60,000
Success Message: You got in and managed to learn some cool dance-off moves!
Failure Message: Wow, bouncers can throw people really far.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 359

#45. Job Title: New Credit Card
Description: You're running low on beer money. Time to sign up for new credit card!
Money Earned: 54,000-65,000
Success Message: Score! You've got cash and got a great deal with ONLY a 848.22% interest rate!
Failure Message: "Sir, with your credit score you are only eligible for a pre-paid credit card."
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 369

#46. Job Title: Old Folks Home Volunteer
Description: Volunteer at the senior citizens center down the street.
Money Earned: 60,000-70,000
Success Message: You're a hit with the residents and received some generous tips!
Failure Message: Mrs. McDonelly wants you to clean her bedpan. FML.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 379

#47. Job Title: Club Treasurer
Description: You are smart with money and the club is putting you in charge. Do you accept?
Money Earned: 64,000-75,000
Success Message: You managed to stretch our shoestring budget for the entire year! Good job!
Failure Message: Spending the clubâs budget on beer will not be accepted. You are being audited.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 399
*You receive 32,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Notes*

#48. Job Title: Blood Donation
Description: Donate your blood for some extra cash.
Money Earned: 68,000-76,000
Success Message: You feel a little woozy, but you got a free cookie and some extra cash!
Failure Message: Your blood was taken from a sparkly guy named Edward with fangs who didn't even work at the donation center.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 419

!Lvl 5 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#49. Job Title: Midterm Madness
Description: It's time to study for midterm exams.
Money Earned: 70,000-80,000
Success Message: You aced the test and got some cash from your parents as a reward!
Failure Message: Not only did you sleep in and arrive at the exam late, but you forgot to put on pants.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 439

#50. Job Title: Keg Stand Competition
Description: Theres a keg stand competition happening at the party. It's go time!
Money Earned: 80,000-85,000
Success Message: You can chug with the best of them. Enjoy your trophy and prize money, and walk the walk of a champion.
Failure Message: You fell on your head while doing a keg stand and got knocked unconscious.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 444

#51. Job Title: Sell Textbooks Online
Description: Sell your textbooks online at your favorite auction site, C-Bay.
Money Earned: 85,000-90,000
Success Message: Good work. You've got enough cash to buy pizza for dinner tonight.
Failure Message: Too bad you don't know how to use a computer, and sold your textbooks for free.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 451

#52. Job Title: Paint a Mural
Description: Help your crush paint a mural for the university.
Money Earned: 90,000-95,000
Success Message: Your artsy nature impresses your crush. You've got a hot date!
Failure Message: Painting private parts on the walls does not impress your crush. Forever alone...
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 458
*You receive 45,000 cash*

#53. Job Title: Download Media
Description: You need to download some "movie files" onto your computer.
Money Earned: 95,000-99,000
Success Message: The download finishes quickly and your roomate is nowhere to be found! Viewing time!
Failure Message: "Whoah, hey guys! Look at what's being downloaded! LOL!" - Busted!
% gained per success: 13%
# of successes to complete job: 8
# of successes so far: 466

#54. Job Title: Internship
Description: You got a job as a college intern at the local marketing firm.
Money Earned: 99,000-105,000
Success Message: Congratulations! You're a pro at making and delivering coffee! The sky's the limit!
Failure Message: You realized that it's an unpaid internship job. FML.
% gained per success: 12%
# of successes to complete job: 9
# of successes so far: 475

#55. Job Title: Party Planner
Description: It's time to throw the most epic party ever. Are you ready?
Money Earned: 105,000-110,000
Success Message: The party was a huge hit! It's going to take you three days to clean up. Good work.
Failure Message: "Um...how did that get onto the ceiling?"
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 485

#56. Job Title: Prank Rival Club
Description: A rival club is trying to muscle yours off campus. Show them who's boss!
Money Earned: 109,000-112,000
Success Message: Your rivals are in awe of how you managed to get their cars encased in blocks of ice.
Failure Message: The rival club was one step ahead of you, and pranked you first.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 495

#57. Job Title: Walk of Shame
Description: You had a memorable night out. Sneak home without anyone noticing!
Money Earned: 112,000-116,000
Success Message: You get back to your dorm unnoticed. Good work, champ.
Failure Message: Your parents decided to pay you a surprise visit, and have been waiting outside your dorm.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 515
*You receive 58,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Note*

#58. Job Title: Go to Rock Concert
Description: Your favorite band is playing in town tonight.
Money Earned: 113,000-124,000
Success Message: You get to meet the band and go backstage. Being a groupie is fun!
Failure Message: You watch the band with binoculars from the nosebleed seats. FML.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 535

#59. Job Title: And Who Are You?
Description: Awesome: You wake up next to a total hottie. Not so awesome: You have no idea what their name is. Battle stations!
Money Earned: 115,000-125,000
Success Message: You discreetly look them up online on your phone and look like a saint. They're so embarrassed that they don't know your name that they buy breakfast.
Failure Message: Nobody is named "Mulva". Try harder.
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 560
*You receive 10,000,000 cash and 4 Doctor's Notes*

#60. Job Title: Panty Raid
Description: What better way to prank the dorm across the campus? Doesn't even matter, you're loaded!
Money Earned: 132,000-140,000
Success Message: Not only do you ninja your way in and out completely undetected, but it turns out there's a huge market for your brand new stash online! Ca-ching!
Failure Message: You try to escape clambering along the laundry lines and fall in a broken, tangled heap on the ground. Hope you opted into the student dental plan!
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 594

#61. Job Title: The Centurion
Description: One hundred shots of beer. One hundred minutes. And just for fun, no bathroom breaks.
Money Earned: 145,000-159,000
Success Message: 99... 100! You can barely see straight, your bladder is ready to burst and all of your friends passed out, but you won! Quick, find some place to curl up and die.
Failure Message: You gag on the first shot, choke on the second and can't keep down the third. My baby sister can out drink you and she's a freaking baby.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 644

#62. Job Title: Vegas Road Trip
Description: Your buddies have a great idea: road trip to Vegas! Pack your lucky rabbit's foot!
Money Earned: 148,000-188,000
Success Message: Turns out obsessively watching competitive poker instead of sleeping has its benefits. In fact, you win so much the bouncers start to look at you funny... Whelp, 'bout time to hit the old dusty trail...
Failure Message: The last thing you can remember is betting it all on black. You wake up married, badly burnt and nursing the hangover that ends civilization.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 744

#63. Job Title: Skinny Dipping
Description: Your crush suggests a late night skinny dip. Hope you've been doing your crunches!
Money Earned: 180,000-188,000
Success Message: Not only do you execute a perfect swan dive into the lake, you look damn sexy doing it. Score!
Failure Message: You slip trying to take off your pants and ram head first into a support beam and step on a rusty nail. You're spending the night in the hospital.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 844

#64. Job Title: Hunger Games
Description: One of your dorm mates made brownies, and shared with you! But now your still hungry.. really hungry...
Money Earned: 150,000-250,000
Success Message: Miraculously, you stumble across a hot dog eating competition down the block and beat everyone by a huge margin!
Failure Message: Nobody has been shopping in a while and you end up eating a box of dog treats that have been behind the sink since before you moved in. Classy.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 944

#65. Job Title: Ethnical Dilemma
Description: You're going to fail your Ethnics class- good thing you have some pictures your prof wouldn't want in circulation...
Money Earned: 230,000-290,000
Success Message: Your prof agrees to pass you and even throws in some money to make sure you shut up. Ethics is fun!
Failure Message: Photoshopped! Not only is your prof in the clear, but you're definitely going to fail now. When was the drop out date again?
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 969
*You receive 2 Doctor's Notes*

#66. Job Title: V (For Victory) Ball
Description: It's time to dig deep: the volleyball team has made finals, but the need you to fill in for an injured member.
Money Earned: 310,000-330,000
Success Message: Bump and spike! You hit the ball so hard it knocks out the guy who tries to return it. Your opponent's morale crumbles like a sand castle in the wind.
Failure Message: You go for an epic dive and end up leaving half of your skin scraped across the ground. Now you know what an orange peel feels like.
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 1,003

#67. Job Title: uTube Video
Description: If a sneezing panda can do it, so can you. It's time to go viral!
Money Earned: 340,000-420,000
Success Message: It turns out the internet DOES want another mash-up/song parody/dance/cat video. I CAN HAS A MILLION VIEWS? Yes, yes you can.
Failure Message: You become the number one search result for "Epic Fail". Two thousand dislikes.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 1,053

#68. Job Title: The Last (Keg) Stand
Description: Terence from Alpha Sigma thinks he's the king of the keg stand. You were doing the keg crawl when you were a baby. It's ON.
Money Earned: 400,000-480,000
Success Message: Not only do you pull off a five minute, un-assisted keg stand, but a scout from "The Solar Circus" gives you a grant for your acrobatic prowess. Merci!
Failure Message: Unbeknownst to you, Terence drinks Canadian beer. The high alcohol content takes you by surprise and your keg stand becomes a keg concussion.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,153

#69. Job Title: Occupy PIMD Protest
Description: The PIMD offices have become surrounded by hippies demanding equality between clubs. Clear them out!
Money Earned: 625,000-675,000
Success Message: Using intelligently constructed and well argued points, you convince them to disperse. Also, bats. A lot of burly guys with bats.
Failure Message: You have no defences against yet another round of "" played on acoustic guitar or the general lack of bathing. Retreat! Regroup!
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,253
*You receive 100,000,000 cash and 8 Doctor's Notes*

#70. Job Title: Water Spectator Sports
Description: Finally, it's pool season! Time to put on some swim gear, lounge around the poolside and best of all, take in the sights.
Money Earned: 708,000-808,000
Success Message: Not only do you catch some amazing sights, but you snap some photos that will be worth cash to the geeks who can't brave the sunshine.
Failure Message: Waaaay too young. Seriously, hit the showers and think about your life.... and phone a lawyer.
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 1,278

#71. Job Title: Drunk Dial
Description: You struck out at the bar tonight and you're drunk and lonely. You have a cell phone. This will probably not end well.
Money Earned: 1,000,000-1,400,000
Success Message: You accidentally call your best friend who promises to pay you if you don't call your ex. That's what friends are for!
Failure Message: You leave a rambling message to a crush who friend-zoned you. It goes on the internet and your mom gets it forwarded in a chain mail. Oops.
% gained per success: 3
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 1,312

#73. Job Title: It's In The Bag
Description: Tim has been going around smacking people in the junk. It's funny, but he's taken it to far. Your mission is to stop him.
Money Earned: 1,100,000-1,400,000
Success Message: *KER-SLAP-CRUCH*! Even with the no slap-backs rule, I don't think you have to worry about him for a while. Is-is he crying? Yeah, totally crying.
Failure Message: The best defense is a good offence. Remember that while you lie writing on the ground, waiting for the swelling to go down.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 1,362

#74. Job Title: Crush the Drunk Mile
Description: When you weren't looking your ride left the party without you! It's gonna be a long walk...
Money Earned: 1,400,000-1,600,000
Success Message: You stumble across a car full of hotties looking for an after hours party. Not only do you show them a good time, but they pay for your booze. Smooth!
Failure Message: Fives minutes into the walk, it starts raining. Then it starts hailing. You lose a shoe. A dog chases you. You fall into a vat of animal fat. It's not your best night.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,462

#75. Job Title: Dutch Baking
Description: You've got company in bed and everything has been going great. You probably shouldn't have eaten all those tacos...
Money Earned: 1,200,000-2,200,000
Success Message: You pull up the covers and cook a delightful dutch treat. They laugh, but also give you money so that you never, ever do that again.
Failure Message: Instead of quiet but deadly you get loud and wet. Errr... hope you weren't even planning on seeing them again.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,562
*You receive 2 Doctor's Notes*

#76. Job Title: Internet Meme Pickup
Description: Your friend bets you that you can't get a number while making a reference to your favorite internet videos.
Money Earned: 1,000,000-2,800,000
Success Message: You manage to find the one non-ironic Rick Astley fan in the club and you hit it off. You're not sure if this is a good thing, but you totally won the bet!
Failure Message: While your dance floor rendition of the majesty that is the Star Battles Kid is eerily accurate, your intended audience just thinks you're having a seizure.
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 1,587

#77. Job Title: Card Puncher
Description: Your date has been waiting their whole life for "the one". You don't know if that's you, but you're willing to fake it.
Money Earned: 1,900,000-2,100,000
Success Message: After charming the pants off them they reveal that they're engaged to "the one" and pay you to keep this secret. Now THAT's a notch on the bedpost.
Failure Message: There's a reason you don't get a first year med student to perform heart surgery. You walk away with some new bruises and bad memories.
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 1,621

#78. Job Title: Copypaster
Description: You've got 20 minutes before your essay is due and you didn't get beyond the title page. Thank god for the internet!
Money Earned: 2,000,000-2,200,000
Success Message: If you had worked as hard writing your essay as you did hastily re-wording and find-replacing the one you found online, you would have been set.
Failure Message: Most essays don't have a URL printed at the bottom of each page. Better have a good excuse at your academic misconduct review board!
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 1,671

#79. Job Title: Argument Club
Description: You finally get invited to the top-secret Argument Club. It's your first night, so you HAVE to argue!
Money Earned: 2,500,000-3,000,000
Success Message: Not only do your arguments prove incredible persuasive, but you manage to take a leadership position in Argument Club and rake in some sweet kickbacks. Your modern day ennui is sated!
Failure Message: You break the 1st rule of Argument Club: Talk about Argument Club. How else can you start arguments? Eat this meatloaf and think about what you did.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,771

#80. Job Title: The Play's The Thing
Description: The Drama Dept. needs a lead for their post-modern neo-classic deconstructionalist play of Romeo and Juliet.
Money Earned: 2,600,000-3,100,000
Success Message: Encore! You move the audience to tears with your performance! They throw flowers! They throw money! Totally worth the stress and throwing up backstage.
Failure Message: That was awful. You couldn't even remember your first... er... line? Good one Keanu.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,871
*You receive 5,000,000,000 cash and 10 Doctor's Notes*

#81. Job Title: Video Game Marathon
Description: Modern Guns: Honor! War! Duty! has been released. Time to head online and show the world your mad skills.
Money Earned: 2,900,000-3,100,000
Success Message: You snipe more headshots in an hour than a photographer does in a lifetime. Players band together to pay you off so they can play the game in peace.
Failure Message: The barely perceivable changes made between this game and last year's turn out to be a bit of a hurdle. Yeah, you're totally a noob.
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 1,896

#82. Job Title: Healthy Living
Description: A health code inspector is checking out your dorm and last night's party totally crashed the place. Quick,before he gets here!
Money Earned: 2,700,000-4,700,000
Success Message: By squeezing everything into a closet and a liberal application of anti-odor spray, you pass inspection. The building manager gives you some cash as thanks.
Failure Message: Even though you've named the mold growing in your room, it's no less deadly to your health. Time for a fumigation...
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 1,930

#83. Job Title: Over The Cap
Description: The brand new pilot course looks like a super easy A! It's also completely full. Time to charm your way in!
Money Earned: 4,000,000-4,800,000
Success Message: You not only get yourself into the class, but get the cap opened so some more students squeeze in as well. They toss you a few bucks in gratitude.
Failure Message: "C'mon... C'mon... COME ON!!!" turns out to be less than persuasive. Guess you'll have to actually TRY this term.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 1,980

#84. Job Title: Launch Day
Description: Your second favorite video game (after PIMD, obviously) launches today. Get in line to grab a copy!
Money Earned: 4,900,000-5,300,000
Success Message: You manage to grab an extra copy to sell online. The game paid for itself and then some!
Failure Message: Hours waiting in the freezing cold end with the store getting a "reduced delivery". How am I supposed to play this "store hold slip"? I can't! You suck!
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 2,080

#85. Job Title: Chicken Fit for a King
Description: It's Chicken Fingers day in the Cafeteria.
Money Earned: 5,000,000-6,000,000
Success Message: You get the last ones and sell some of them to hungry students at a markup! First you get the chicken, then you get the power, then you get the women...
Failure Message: You get the last chicken finger, but they're all out of honey dill sauce. That's practically a war crime.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 2,180
*You receive 8 Doctor's Notes*

#86. Job Title: Retaliation of the Nerds
Description: The nerd frat needs your help preforming to win the Greek Games. Well, they did get those viruses off your computer...
Money Earned: 6,500,000-6,900,000
Success Message: The world will never see another theremin solo of it's kind ever again. The nerds tearfully pay you for the beauty you've birthed into the world.
Failure Message: All of your electronic instruments end up blowing the power grid, disqualifying the nerds instantly. Smart move!
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 2,205

#87. Job Title: Edward 40 Hands
Description: You tape two 40 ounce bottles in each hand. You don't take them off until they've both been drunk. You try not to pass out. Begin!
Money Earned: 7,400,000-7,600,000
Success Message: In celebration of your victory you smash both bottles together attempting to clap for yourself. Blang!
Failure Message: You wake up with glass in every possible orifice. Yep, that one too. Get to a doctor already!
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 2,239

#88. Job Title: Hack Attack
Description: You attempt to beat the world record for longest continuous foot bag game- Only 69,812 more kicks to go!
Money Earned: 7,400,000-9,400,000
Success Message: Your leg threatens to fall off, but you do it, you beat the record, to the awe of... nobody. People feel bad and give you some money.
Failure Message: 1-2... Crud. 1-2-3... Crud. 1-2... CRAP! Don't worry champ, you'll get there.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 2,289

#89. Job Title: Joyful Club
Description: The campus glee club needs an extra singer ASAP, or they are going to lose sectionals. They'll even pay you if they place.
Money Earned: 7,300,000-11,300,000
Success Message: Years of singing in the shower finally pay off in this, your most glorious moment. But, since good things can't happen to the Glee club you only get 3rd.
Failure Message: Awful. You think a High C is a soft drink. You're just embarrassing yourself.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 2,389

#90. Job Title: Plank Power
Description: A context has been announced for the best planking picture- The winner gets cash! Time to rest those core muscles.
Money Earned: 8,200,000-12,200,000
Success Message: H-h-how did you even get up there? Better still, how did you get down?
Failure Message: It's not called planking when you're on the ground. That's called napping.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 2,489
*You receive 20,000,000,000 cash*

I didn't just post these to get moderator and I only deleted them in my rage yesterday and I apologize. I acted childish and it's unacceptable.
Click to expand...

-Anela-_-Nani- · Jun 11, 2015

Mr-Strikes said:

Guide to All the Jobs of PIMD

JOBS:

#1. Job Title: New Party
Description: You've heard there is a party at Delta Lota Kappa. Maybe you van sell this information to the freshman.
Money Earned: 66-100
Success Message: Haha, they bought it. You earned yourself some cash.
Failure Message: Doesn't look like anyone to pay for this news.
% gained per success: 50%
# of successes to complete job: 2
# of successes so far: 2

#2. Job Title: Tutoring
Description: Maybe you can make a little extra money tutoring some of the jocks.
Money Earned: 133-200
Success Message: Looks like your student figured out that the world wasn't flat. Nice work.
Failure Message: Jock failed his exam. Who would've guessed Rome isn't in Milwaukee?
% gained per success: 34%
# of successes to complete job: 3
# of successes so far: 5

#3. Job Title: Lawn Mowing
Description: Sun, grass what's not to like about doing a mowing job. Make some extra cash.
Money Earned: 133-200
Success Message: The old lady's lawn you mowed watched you the entire time and gave a great tip.
Failure Message: You ran over the flowers. Obviously you don't understand the complexity of mowing.
% gained per success: 25%
# of successes to complete job: 4
# of successes so far: 9

#4. Job Title: Try out for the Team
Description: The football team is looking for players. I hear they give out a bonus if you make the cut.
Money Earned: 800-1,200
Success Message: Sweet! All it took was 4 injuries, but you made it!
Failure Message: Wow, who could have guessed you had to be fit. Maybe try the cheerleading team next.
% gained per success: 34%
# of successes to complete job: 3
# of successes so far: 12

#5. Job Title: Food Run
Description: Some people need you to make a food run for their party.
Money Earned: 1,250-1,750
Success Message: It looks like they were drunk when they were reimbursing you, you made some extra cash.
Failure Message: Wow, they reimbursed you the EXACT amount. Nothing for gas either.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 22

!Level 1 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#6. Job Title: Sign up for Class
Description: Sign up for some classes and make your parents think your learning.
Money Earned: 1,525-1,575
Success Message: Looks like there was an accounting error, you got a partial refund.
Failure Message: Wow, they really just take your money and send you on your way.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 32

#7. Job Title: Note Taking
Description: One of your classmates needs you to take notes. I smell cash!
Money Earned: 800-2,400
Success Message: Nice! you were going to take notes anyways and you got money for it.
Failure Message: Okay, the fact that your writing was compared to ancient cave drawings is a bad thing.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 37

#8. Job Title: Grandma's Gift
Description: A package arrived in the mail... Looks like it's from Grandma!
Money Earned: 1,550-1,750
Success Message: Grandma sent some money. Oh how we love grandma!
Failure Message: It's just junk mail. Doh!
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 47

#9. Job Title: Home Chores
Description: Seems like your parents have a few chores for you back home. It's go time!
Money Earned: 2,000-12,000
Success Message: Nice! You found some cash while cleaning the coach.
Failure Message: Too bad doing work for family gets you nothing.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 52

#10. Job Title: Frosh Week
Description: Some of the local Greek houses are recruiting. Sign up now.
Money Earned: 7,200-7,800
Success Message: You signed the form and get free pizza and coupons... living the Dream!
Failure Message: Wow, you got turned down by the lamest frat house... How do you feel about that?
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 72

!Level 2 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#11. Job Title: Fight the Mascot
Description: It's the playoffs and the college mascot is looking for a fight. Take one for the team!
Money Earned: 5,000-11,000
Success Message: You showed that bird who's boss! Time to parade the beaten mascot around campus.
Failure Message: Ouch! Didn't expect the mascot to be a pro fighter. Run and hide in your dorm room!
% gained per success: 25%
# of successes to complete job: 4
# of successes so far: 76

#12. Job Title: Team Sugar Mama
Description: The team needs new jerseys and they are looking to you to seduce a sugar mama!
Money Earned: 8,000-9,000
Success Message: Cha-ching! Thanks to your "efforts" the team has new jerseys and new equipment. Go Team!
Failure Message: Didn't think she was on the board of directors! Perhaps a bake sale?
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 81

#13. Job Title: Food for Thought
Description: The club is having its first meeting. Are you able to score some food?
Money Earned: 8,500-8,600
Success Message: Good Call on the greasy fried chicken! Those students were so hungry!
Failure Message: Uhh gross! Did you expect students to get excited with a large bag of spinach?
% gained per success: 25%
# of successes to complete job: 4
# of successes so far: 85

#14. Job Title: Homework Help
Description: It looks like your friends aren't doing so well in class. Help them with some of your answers.
Money Earned: 8,000-9,200
Success Message: There is noting like a little bit of bribery to show you their appreciation.
Failure Message: Ouch, seems the teacher caught on and docked both of your grades.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 92

#15. Job Title: Lab Subject
Description: You see a flyer looking for test subjects. Offering cash and mild chance of side effects.
Money Earned: 8,500-8,900
Success Message: You got your cash and only a mild tick. Good work.
Failure Message: You failed the simple test of filling out your name. No cash for you.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 99
*You receive 7,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Note*

#16. Job Title: Group Project
Description: Your group project is struggling. Put in some crazy hours and see if it pays off.
Money Earned: 8,000-9,600
Success Message: Seems the group got you a little gift of appreciation for all the hours you put in.
Failure Message: All that work and your group still failed... Nice one Einstein!
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 109

#17. Job Title: Club of the Year
Description: The student council is awarding the club of the year with extra spending money.
Money Earned: 7,000-11,000
Success Message: We won! It's good no one knows that you are dating the student council president.
Failure Message: We lost to the math club! I mean, they do homework for FUN! Better luck next time.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 119

#18. Job Title: Coach Little League Team
Description: Your community baseball team is looking for a coach. Can u be the leader they seek?
Money Earned: 9,000-10,000
Success Message: Coach you did it! The community is really proud and have named a street after you!
Failure Message: Those who can't play, coach. Apparently you can't coach either!
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 129

#19. Job Title: ID Guy
Description: You met this guys who says he can make fake IDs. Maybe he can get one for you and your friends?
Money Earned: 9,500-10,500
Success Message: Wow, looks just like the real thing. You're going to make good use of this.
Failure Message: Ouch. A kid and a crayon could have made a better ID. Too bad.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 139
*You receive 7,500 cash*

#20. Job Title: Missing Jersey
Description: You lost your jersey at the party last nice. You need to borrow one for tonight's game.
Money Earned: 12,200-12,900
Success Message: This might be your lucky jersey. You made the winning shot and got a date with the cheerleader
Failure Message: The smell of your unwashed jersey you unconscious during the game.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 149

#21. Job Title: ID the I'D Guy
Description: Seems like the campus police are offering an award if you turn in the I'D guy. Do it!
Money Earned: 13,000-13,700
Success Message: Wow, what an award. You can buy yourself some serious amounts of macaroni and cheese.
Failure Message: By reward, they meant a coupon for laundry. Uber lame.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes needed to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 169

#22. Job Title: Private Time
Description: Your roommate wants some "alone time" in the dorm...
Money Earned: 13,400-14,900
Success Message: You got some extra beer money as a token of appreciation.
Failure Message: You come back to a really, Really, REALLY disgusting room.
% gained per success: 13%
# of successes to complete job: 8
# of successes so far: 177

#23. Job Title: Answers! Get your Answers!
Description: You sneak into the professors office and steal the answer key. Try selling the key for some extra cash!
Money Earned: 14,000-16,000
Success Message: You should do this more often. You made enough Money to quit your lame pizza delivery job.
Failure Message: The professor outsmarted the entire class by creating a fake answer key. Doh.
% gained per success: 13%
# of successes to complete job: 8
# of successes so far: 185

#24. Job Title: Organize a Study Group
Description: You've seen that hottie in your class. Organize a study group and get closer to them.
Money Earned: 14,800-16,700
Success Message: Nice moves. You now have a date, and you helped improved their IQ!
Failure Message: Who knew they didn't like studying and just wanted to party. Better luck next time.
% gained per success: 13%
# of successes needed to complete job: 8
# of successes so far: 193

#25. Job Title: Help New Roommate Move In
Description: You've got a new roommate! Help him move his stuff in.
Money Earned: 15,700-17,500
Success Message: You moved his stuff in record time, and got a free lunch out of it!
Failure Message: While moving his bed you discovered a huge stain on it. Your face was pressed against it for 20 minutes. Sadness.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 200

!Level 3 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#26. Job Title: Throw the Game
Description: A rich student has offered you money to throw tonight's basketball game.
Money Earned: 16,500-18,200
Success Message: You decided to play fair and win! You go looking for the rich kid and take his money anyway. Talk about a win-win situation!
Failure Message: You decided to play fair and still lost. You should've taken the cash.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 207

#27. Job Title: Clean the Kitchen
Description: It's time to clean up the mess in your dorm's kitchen.
Money Earned: 17,400-19,000
Success Message: You cashed in all the empty beer bottles at the recycling center. Score!
Failure Message: "Ah, so that's where the are coming from."
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 214

#28. Job Title: Spike the Water Cooler
Description: Your team is getting crushed. Add "magic ingredients" to the other team's water cooler.
Money Earned: 18,200-19,800
Success Message: Victory is sweet. Even if it means the other team has urgent bowel movements.
Failure Message: The other team's water boy found you and beat you up. Who knew he would be so strong?
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 221

#29. Job Title: Band Practice
Description: You've heard that playing music impresses your crush. Sign up for the band!
Money Earned: 19,100-20,500
Success Message: Not only did you woo your crush, but you've earned a cash from a music scholarship!
Failure Message: "Go on a date with you Haven't you heard? I don't want to be seen with a band geek!"
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 228

#30. Job Title: Pump that Iron
Description: It's time to go to the gym to work out. Toned abs, here we come!
Money Earned: 19,900-21,300
Success Message: You are the pinnacle of human fitness. Good job!
Failure Message: You decide to leave when you see a 5 year old lifting weights heavier than you.
% gained per success: 18%
# of successes to complete job: 6
# of successes so far: 234

#31. Job Title: Sell Furniture on the Internet
Description: Time to get rid of your dusty furniture. Try to sell it on the internet!
Money Earned: 20,700-22,100
Success Message: Sweet! You got your cash and got rid of crappy furniture. That was easy.
Failure Message: You need to go to the police station to get a restraining order for the serial killer who came to visit.
% gained per success: 18%
# of successes to complete job: 6
# of successes so far: 240

#32. Job Title: Team Fundraiser
Description: The team needs money money to travel for the championship game. Bake sale!
Money Earned: 20,700-23,800
Success Message: You sold enough cookies to travel first class. Girl scouts got nothing on you!
Failure Message: You need to raise more money because you ate all the cookies. Good job, jerk.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 245
*You receive 11,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Note*

#33. Job Title: Chores?!
Description: Your parents called. Mom wants you to come home and do the dishes.
Money Earned: 22,400-23,700
Success Message: After doing the chores, you eat an amazing dinner and get your laundry done for free. Boo yah!
Failure Message: "When your done with the dishes, don't forget to scrub the bathroom toilets."
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 250

#34. Job Title: Missing Mascot
Description: The team mascot is missing. It's your time to shine!
Money Earned: 22,600-25,100
Success Message: You put on the mascot outfit and get the crowd moving. Nice moves!
Failure Message: Ouch! That's what happens when you try a triple backflip off a trampoline without practice.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 257

#35. Job Title: Pledge for a Club
Description: Some clubs are accepting new members. Apply now!
Money Earned: 24,100-25,200
Success Message: You got in and won a lousy gift certificate. Maybe you should apply to a REAL club.
Failure Message: You got rejected. Perhaps you should try to join a REAL club?
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 264
*You receive 11,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Note*[/i

#36. Job Title: Statue Bandit
Description: Steal the school statue from a rival college.
Money Earned: 31,700-33,100
Success Message: Your antics have earned you the respect and admiration of the students.
Failure Message: Busted! Time to go home and nurse those two black eyes.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 274

#37. Job Title: Buy Groceries
Description: It's time to buy groceries for you and your roommate.
Money Earned: 39,300-41,000
Success Message: Your roommate gives you a little extra cash for your efforts.
Failure Message: Your roomate eats all of the food in 30 minutes. "Hungry!!!"
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 284

#38. Job Title: Bribe Resident Advisor
Description: Your RA is giving you trouble for throwing a loud party. Get rid of him!
Money Earned: 47,000-48,800
Success Message: Turns out the RA was just sad you didn't send him an invite, and pays YOU to attend!
Failure Message: "NO PARTY FOR YOU!" - who knew the RA was such a prude?
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 304

#39. Job Title: Track and Field
Description: It's time to practice for the upcoming race.
Money Earned: 47,700-52,700
Success Message: You won the race! Good job, champ!
Failure Message: You realize that the only sport you're good at is drinking beer.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 324
*You receive 24,000 cash*

#40. Job Title: Beer Pong Contest
Description: It's time for the annual campus-wide beer pong tournament! Will you rise to the challenge?
Money Earned: 48,900-54,000
Success Message: There's nothing like a giant beer pong trophy to impress your friends. Oh wait, prize money...even better.
Failure Message: Your team got beat by two freshman who made fun of your mother. Sadness.
% gained per success: 25%
# of successes to complete job: 4
# of successes so far: 328

!Lvl 4 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#41. Job Title: Sell Junk Food During Ban
Description: Administration has banned junk food after reading a scary new article. Opportunity awaits!
Money Earned: 49,500-56,400
Success Message: Good job! You've created a business empire!
Failure Message: You ate your own supply, and owe money to the scary looking guys who sold you Twinkies.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 333

#42. Job Title: Freshman Hazing
Description: It's time to haze the freshman. This will be fun!
Money Earned: 51,000-58,000
Success Message: You dump the frosh in a bathtub full of jello. Now they fear and respect you.
Failure Message: You screamed like a little girl when you saw a spider in front of the frosh. You'll never live it down.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 340

#43. Job Title: Call Center
Description: Get a part-time job at the local customer support call center.
Money Earned: 52,000-59,000
Success Message: You scored some extra cash. Boo yah!
Failure Message: You got caught downloading "movie files". Fired!
% gained per success: 12%
# of successes to complete job: 9
# of successes so far: 349
*You receive 26,000 cash*

#44. Job Title: Party Time
Description: Try to get into the local nightclub with your fake ID.
Money Earned: 53,000-60,000
Success Message: You got in and managed to learn some cool dance-off moves!
Failure Message: Wow, bouncers can throw people really far.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 359

#45. Job Title: New Credit Card
Description: You're running low on beer money. Time to sign up for new credit card!
Money Earned: 54,000-65,000
Success Message: Score! You've got cash and got a great deal with ONLY a 848.22% interest rate!
Failure Message: "Sir, with your credit score you are only eligible for a pre-paid credit card."
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 369

#46. Job Title: Old Folks Home Volunteer
Description: Volunteer at the senior citizens center down the street.
Money Earned: 60,000-70,000
Success Message: You're a hit with the residents and received some generous tips!
Failure Message: Mrs. McDonelly wants you to clean her bedpan. FML.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 379

#47. Job Title: Club Treasurer
Description: You are smart with money and the club is putting you in charge. Do you accept?
Money Earned: 64,000-75,000
Success Message: You managed to stretch our shoestring budget for the entire year! Good job!
Failure Message: Spending the clubâs budget on beer will not be accepted. You are being audited.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 399
*You receive 32,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Notes*

#48. Job Title: Blood Donation
Description: Donate your blood for some extra cash.
Money Earned: 68,000-76,000
Success Message: You feel a little woozy, but you got a free cookie and some extra cash!
Failure Message: Your blood was taken from a sparkly guy named Edward with fangs who didn't even work at the donation center.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 419

!Lvl 5 Job Mastery Award Achieved!

#49. Job Title: Midterm Madness
Description: It's time to study for midterm exams.
Money Earned: 70,000-80,000
Success Message: You aced the test and got some cash from your parents as a reward!
Failure Message: Not only did you sleep in and arrive at the exam late, but you forgot to put on pants.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 439

#50. Job Title: Keg Stand Competition
Description: Theres a keg stand competition happening at the party. It's go time!
Money Earned: 80,000-85,000
Success Message: You can chug with the best of them. Enjoy your trophy and prize money, and walk the walk of a champion.
Failure Message: You fell on your head while doing a keg stand and got knocked unconscious.
% gained per success: 20%
# of successes to complete job: 5
# of successes so far: 444

#51. Job Title: Sell Textbooks Online
Description: Sell your textbooks online at your favorite auction site, C-Bay.
Money Earned: 85,000-90,000
Success Message: Good work. You've got enough cash to buy pizza for dinner tonight.
Failure Message: Too bad you don't know how to use a computer, and sold your textbooks for free.
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 451

#52. Job Title: Paint a Mural
Description: Help your crush paint a mural for the university.
Money Earned: 90,000-95,000
Success Message: Your artsy nature impresses your crush. You've got a hot date!
Failure Message: Painting private parts on the walls does not impress your crush. Forever alone...
% gained per success: 15%
# of successes to complete job: 7
# of successes so far: 458
*You receive 45,000 cash*

#53. Job Title: Download Media
Description: You need to download some "movie files" onto your computer.
Money Earned: 95,000-99,000
Success Message: The download finishes quickly and your roomate is nowhere to be found! Viewing time!
Failure Message: "Whoah, hey guys! Look at what's being downloaded! LOL!" - Busted!
% gained per success: 13%
# of successes to complete job: 8
# of successes so far: 466

#54. Job Title: Internship
Description: You got a job as a college intern at the local marketing firm.
Money Earned: 99,000-105,000
Success Message: Congratulations! You're a pro at making and delivering coffee! The sky's the limit!
Failure Message: You realized that it's an unpaid internship job. FML.
% gained per success: 12%
# of successes to complete job: 9
# of successes so far: 475

#55. Job Title: Party Planner
Description: It's time to throw the most epic party ever. Are you ready?
Money Earned: 105,000-110,000
Success Message: The party was a huge hit! It's going to take you three days to clean up. Good work.
Failure Message: "Um...how did that get onto the ceiling?"
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 485

#56. Job Title: Prank Rival Club
Description: A rival club is trying to muscle yours off campus. Show them who's boss!
Money Earned: 109,000-112,000
Success Message: Your rivals are in awe of how you managed to get their cars encased in blocks of ice.
Failure Message: The rival club was one step ahead of you, and pranked you first.
% gained per success: 10%
# of successes to complete job: 10
# of successes so far: 495

#57. Job Title: Walk of Shame
Description: You had a memorable night out. Sneak home without anyone noticing!
Money Earned: 112,000-116,000
Success Message: You get back to your dorm unnoticed. Good work, champ.
Failure Message: Your parents decided to pay you a surprise visit, and have been waiting outside your dorm.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 515
*You receive 58,000 cash and 1 Doctor's Note*

#58. Job Title: Go to Rock Concert
Description: Your favorite band is playing in town tonight.
Money Earned: 113,000-124,000
Success Message: You get to meet the band and go backstage. Being a groupie is fun!
Failure Message: You watch the band with binoculars from the nosebleed seats. FML.
% gained per success: 5%
# of successes to complete job: 20
# of successes so far: 535

#59. Job Title: And Who Are You?
Description: Awesome: You wake up next to a total hottie. Not so awesome: You have no idea what their name is. Battle stations!
Money Earned: 115,000-125,000
Success Message: You discreetly look them up online on your phone and look like a saint. They're so embarrassed that they don't know your name that they buy breakfast.
Failure Message: Nobody is named "Mulva". Try harder.
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 560
*You receive 10,000,000 cash and 4 Doctor's Notes*

#60. Job Title: Panty Raid
Description: What better way to prank the dorm across the campus? Doesn't even matter, you're loaded!
Money Earned: 132,000-140,000
Success Message: Not only do you ninja your way in and out completely undetected, but it turns out there's a huge market for your brand new stash online! Ca-ching!
Failure Message: You try to escape clambering along the laundry lines and fall in a broken, tangled heap on the ground. Hope you opted into the student dental plan!
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 594

#61. Job Title: The Centurion
Description: One hundred shots of beer. One hundred minutes. And just for fun, no bathroom breaks.
Money Earned: 145,000-159,000
Success Message: 99... 100! You can barely see straight, your bladder is ready to burst and all of your friends passed out, but you won! Quick, find some place to curl up and die.
Failure Message: You gag on the first shot, choke on the second and can't keep down the third. My baby sister can out drink you and she's a freaking baby.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 644

#62. Job Title: Vegas Road Trip
Description: Your buddies have a great idea: road trip to Vegas! Pack your lucky rabbit's foot!
Money Earned: 148,000-188,000
Success Message: Turns out obsessively watching competitive poker instead of sleeping has its benefits. In fact, you win so much the bouncers start to look at you funny... Whelp, 'bout time to hit the old dusty trail...
Failure Message: The last thing you can remember is betting it all on black. You wake up married, badly burnt and nursing the hangover that ends civilization.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 744

#63. Job Title: Skinny Dipping
Description: Your crush suggests a late night skinny dip. Hope you've been doing your crunches!
Money Earned: 180,000-188,000
Success Message: Not only do you execute a perfect swan dive into the lake, you look damn sexy doing it. Score!
Failure Message: You slip trying to take off your pants and ram head first into a support beam and step on a rusty nail. You're spending the night in the hospital.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 844

#64. Job Title: Hunger Games
Description: One of your dorm mates made brownies, and shared with you! But now your still hungry.. really hungry...
Money Earned: 150,000-250,000
Success Message: Miraculously, you stumble across a hot dog eating competition down the block and beat everyone by a huge margin!
Failure Message: Nobody has been shopping in a while and you end up eating a box of dog treats that have been behind the sink since before you moved in. Classy.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 944

#65. Job Title: Ethnical Dilemma
Description: You're going to fail your Ethnics class- good thing you have some pictures your prof wouldn't want in circulation...
Money Earned: 230,000-290,000
Success Message: Your prof agrees to pass you and even throws in some money to make sure you shut up. Ethics is fun!
Failure Message: Photoshopped! Not only is your prof in the clear, but you're definitely going to fail now. When was the drop out date again?
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 969
*You receive 2 Doctor's Notes*

#66. Job Title: V (For Victory) Ball
Description: It's time to dig deep: the volleyball team has made finals, but the need you to fill in for an injured member.
Money Earned: 310,000-330,000
Success Message: Bump and spike! You hit the ball so hard it knocks out the guy who tries to return it. Your opponent's morale crumbles like a sand castle in the wind.
Failure Message: You go for an epic dive and end up leaving half of your skin scraped across the ground. Now you know what an orange peel feels like.
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 1,003

#67. Job Title: uTube Video
Description: If a sneezing panda can do it, so can you. It's time to go viral!
Money Earned: 340,000-420,000
Success Message: It turns out the internet DOES want another mash-up/song parody/dance/cat video. I CAN HAS A MILLION VIEWS? Yes, yes you can.
Failure Message: You become the number one search result for "Epic Fail". Two thousand dislikes.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 1,053

#68. Job Title: The Last (Keg) Stand
Description: Terence from Alpha Sigma thinks he's the king of the keg stand. You were doing the keg crawl when you were a baby. It's ON.
Money Earned: 400,000-480,000
Success Message: Not only do you pull off a five minute, un-assisted keg stand, but a scout from "The Solar Circus" gives you a grant for your acrobatic prowess. Merci!
Failure Message: Unbeknownst to you, Terence drinks Canadian beer. The high alcohol content takes you by surprise and your keg stand becomes a keg concussion.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,153

#69. Job Title: Occupy PIMD Protest
Description: The PIMD offices have become surrounded by hippies demanding equality between clubs. Clear them out!
Money Earned: 625,000-675,000
Success Message: Using intelligently constructed and well argued points, you convince them to disperse. Also, bats. A lot of burly guys with bats.
Failure Message: You have no defences against yet another round of " " played on acoustic guitar or the general lack of bathing. Retreat! Regroup!
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,253
*You receive 100,000,000 cash and 8 Doctor's Notes*

#70. Job Title: Water Spectator Sports
Description: Finally, it's pool season! Time to put on some swim gear, lounge around the poolside and best of all, take in the sights.
Money Earned: 708,000-808,000
Success Message: Not only do you catch some amazing sights, but you snap some photos that will be worth cash to the geeks who can't brave the sunshine.
Failure Message: Waaaay too young. Seriously, hit the showers and think about your life.... and phone a lawyer.
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 1,278

#71. Job Title: Drunk Dial
Description: You struck out at the bar tonight and you're drunk and lonely. You have a cell phone. This will probably not end well.
Money Earned: 1,000,000-1,400,000
Success Message: You accidentally call your best friend who promises to pay you if you don't call your ex. That's what friends are for!
Failure Message: You leave a rambling message to a crush who friend-zoned you. It goes on the internet and your mom gets it forwarded in a chain mail. Oops.
% gained per success: 3
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 1,312

#73. Job Title: It's In The Bag
Description: Tim has been going around smacking people in the junk. It's funny, but he's taken it to far. Your mission is to stop him.
Money Earned: 1,100,000-1,400,000
Success Message: *KER-SLAP-CRUCH*! Even with the no slap-backs rule, I don't think you have to worry about him for a while. Is-is he crying? Yeah, totally crying.
Failure Message: The best defense is a good offence. Remember that while you lie writing on the ground, waiting for the swelling to go down.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 1,362

#74. Job Title: Crush the Drunk Mile
Description: When you weren't looking your ride left the party without you! It's gonna be a long walk...
Money Earned: 1,400,000-1,600,000
Success Message: You stumble across a car full of hotties looking for an after hours party. Not only do you show them a good time, but they pay for your booze. Smooth!
Failure Message: Fives minutes into the walk, it starts raining. Then it starts hailing. You lose a shoe. A dog chases you. You fall into a vat of animal fat. It's not your best night.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,462

#75. Job Title: Dutch Baking
Description: You've got company in bed and everything has been going great. You probably shouldn't have eaten all those tacos...
Money Earned: 1,200,000-2,200,000
Success Message: You pull up the covers and cook a delightful dutch treat. They laugh, but also give you money so that you never, ever do that again.
Failure Message: Instead of quiet but deadly you get loud and wet. Errr... hope you weren't even planning on seeing them again.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,562
*You receive 2 Doctor's Notes*

#76. Job Title: Internet Meme Pickup
Description: Your friend bets you that you can't get a number while making a reference to your favorite internet videos.
Money Earned: 1,000,000-2,800,000
Success Message: You manage to find the one non-ironic Rick Astley fan in the club and you hit it off. You're not sure if this is a good thing, but you totally won the bet!
Failure Message: While your dance floor rendition of the majesty that is the Star Battles Kid is eerily accurate, your intended audience just thinks you're having a seizure.
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 1,587

#77. Job Title: Card Puncher
Description: Your date has been waiting their whole life for "the one". You don't know if that's you, but you're willing to fake it.
Money Earned: 1,900,000-2,100,000
Success Message: After charming the pants off them they reveal that they're engaged to "the one" and pay you to keep this secret. Now THAT's a notch on the bedpost.
Failure Message: There's a reason you don't get a first year med student to perform heart surgery. You walk away with some new bruises and bad memories.
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 1,621

#78. Job Title: Copypaster
Description: You've got 20 minutes before your essay is due and you didn't get beyond the title page. Thank god for the internet!
Money Earned: 2,000,000-2,200,000
Success Message: If you had worked as hard writing your essay as you did hastily re-wording and find-replacing the one you found online, you would have been set.
Failure Message: Most essays don't have a URL printed at the bottom of each page. Better have a good excuse at your academic misconduct review board!
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 1,671

#79. Job Title: Argument Club
Description: You finally get invited to the top-secret Argument Club. It's your first night, so you HAVE to argue!
Money Earned: 2,500,000-3,000,000
Success Message: Not only do your arguments prove incredible persuasive, but you manage to take a leadership position in Argument Club and rake in some sweet kickbacks. Your modern day ennui is sated!
Failure Message: You break the 1st rule of Argument Club: Talk about Argument Club. How else can you start arguments? Eat this meatloaf and think about what you did.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,771

#80. Job Title: The Play's The Thing
Description: The Drama Dept. needs a lead for their post-modern neo-classic deconstructionalist play of Romeo and Juliet.
Money Earned: 2,600,000-3,100,000
Success Message: Encore! You move the audience to tears with your performance! They throw flowers! They throw money! Totally worth the stress and throwing up backstage.
Failure Message: That was awful. You couldn't even remember your first... er... line? Good one Keanu.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 1,871
*You receive 5,000,000,000 cash and 10 Doctor's Notes*

#81. Job Title: Video Game Marathon
Description: Modern Guns: Honor! War! Duty! has been released. Time to head online and show the world your mad skills.
Money Earned: 2,900,000-3,100,000
Success Message: You snipe more headshots in an hour than a photographer does in a lifetime. Players band together to pay you off so they can play the game in peace.
Failure Message: The barely perceivable changes made between this game and last year's turn out to be a bit of a hurdle. Yeah, you're totally a noob.
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 1,896

#82. Job Title: Healthy Living
Description: A health code inspector is checking out your dorm and last night's party totally crashed the place. Quick,before he gets here!
Money Earned: 2,700,000-4,700,000
Success Message: By squeezing everything into a closet and a liberal application of anti-odor spray, you pass inspection. The building manager gives you some cash as thanks.
Failure Message: Even though you've named the mold growing in your room, it's no less deadly to your health. Time for a fumigation...
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 1,930

#83. Job Title: Over The Cap
Description: The brand new pilot course looks like a super easy A! It's also completely full. Time to charm your way in!
Money Earned: 4,000,000-4,800,000
Success Message: You not only get yourself into the class, but get the cap opened so some more students squeeze in as well. They toss you a few bucks in gratitude.
Failure Message: "C'mon... C'mon... COME ON!!!" turns out to be less than persuasive. Guess you'll have to actually TRY this term.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 1,980

#84. Job Title: Launch Day
Description: Your second favorite video game (after PIMD, obviously) launches today. Get in line to grab a copy!
Money Earned: 4,900,000-5,300,000
Success Message: You manage to grab an extra copy to sell online. The game paid for itself and then some!
Failure Message: Hours waiting in the freezing cold end with the store getting a "reduced delivery". How am I supposed to play this "store hold slip"? I can't! You suck!
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 2,080

#85. Job Title: Chicken Fit for a King
Description: It's Chicken Fingers day in the Cafeteria.
Money Earned: 5,000,000-6,000,000
Success Message: You get the last ones and sell some of them to hungry students at a markup! First you get the chicken, then you get the power, then you get the women...
Failure Message: You get the last chicken finger, but they're all out of honey dill sauce. That's practically a war crime.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 2,180
*You receive 8 Doctor's Notes*

#86. Job Title: Retaliation of the Nerds
Description: The nerd frat needs your help preforming to win the Greek Games. Well, they did get those viruses off your computer...
Money Earned: 6,500,000-6,900,000
Success Message: The world will never see another theremin solo of it's kind ever again. The nerds tearfully pay you for the beauty you've birthed into the world.
Failure Message: All of your electronic instruments end up blowing the power grid, disqualifying the nerds instantly. Smart move!
% gained per success: 4%
# of successes to complete job: 25
# of successes so far: 2,205

#87. Job Title: Edward 40 Hands
Description: You tape two 40 ounce bottles in each hand. You don't take them off until they've both been drunk. You try not to pass out. Begin!
Money Earned: 7,400,000-7,600,000
Success Message: In celebration of your victory you smash both bottles together attempting to clap for yourself. Blang!
Failure Message: You wake up with glass in every possible orifice. Yep, that one too. Get to a doctor already!
% gained per success: 3%
# of successes to complete job: 34
# of successes so far: 2,239

#88. Job Title: Hack Attack
Description: You attempt to beat the world record for longest continuous foot bag game- Only 69,812 more kicks to go!
Money Earned: 7,400,000-9,400,000
Success Message: Your leg threatens to fall off, but you do it, you beat the record, to the awe of... nobody. People feel bad and give you some money.
Failure Message: 1-2... Crud. 1-2-3... Crud. 1-2... CRAP! Don't worry champ, you'll get there.
% gained per success: 2%
# of successes to complete job: 50
# of successes so far: 2,289

#89. Job Title: Joyful Club
Description: The campus glee club needs an extra singer ASAP, or they are going to lose sectionals. They'll even pay you if they place.
Money Earned: 7,300,000-11,300,000
Success Message: Years of singing in the shower finally pay off in this, your most glorious moment. But, since good things can't happen to the Glee club you only get 3rd.
Failure Message: Awful. You think a High C is a soft drink. You're just embarrassing yourself.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 2,389

#90. Job Title: Plank Power
Description: A context has been announced for the best planking picture- The winner gets cash! Time to rest those core muscles.
Money Earned: 8,200,000-12,200,000
Success Message: H-h-how did you even get up there? Better still, how did you get down?
Failure Message: It's not called planking when you're on the ground. That's called napping.
% gained per success: 1%
# of successes to complete job: 100
# of successes so far: 2,489
*You receive 20,000,000,000 cash*

I didn't just post these to get moderator and I only deleted them in my rage yesterday and I apologize. I acted childish and it's unacceptable.
Click to expand...

Julzz · Jun 14, 2015

Bump as requested 

_Agent-Unicorn-K8_ · Jun 16, 2015

Bummed for someone looking for it 

Sinful · Jun 17, 2015

Oh, never seen this. Bumping for others.

TSK_-_PuaMae_-_ · Jun 19, 2015

Postit

ChEeky_QuiNn_AraBella · Jul 5, 2015

Hiw many jobs are there in total? Cause i already dont have unfinsed jobs even if i uograded already?

Jiggy · Jul 5, 2015

ChEeky_QuiNn_AraBella said:

Hiw many jobs are there in total? Cause i already dont have unfinsed jobs even if i uograded already?
Click to expand...

90 jobs in total. Upgrading does not give you more jobs but it does make it easier to complete them. Last job is called Plank Power.

ChEeky_QuiNn_AraBella · Jul 6, 2015

Hmmmm i think i really finised it all  thanks

Joeykinz · Jul 16, 2015

Last job also gives 10 doctor notes

Mcnef · Jul 17, 2015

This is an excellent guide, one thing I would also like to see is what cs you need to have 100% chance for a successful job completion.

Queen_Of-The_Fall · Aug 31, 2015

Sinful said:

Oh, never seen this. Bumping for others.
Click to expand...

Hisami-n · Sep 5, 2015

Buh hump

Glass · Sep 6, 2015

Amazing thanks 

FootIongSandwich · Sep 21, 2015

Bump

starkisses · Oct 7, 2015

Bump because people forget about jobbing for ec 

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