I like the story itself and I'm not hating, but recently the post has started making me think. Personally, I believe that being raped is way more traumatizing than you might think. If she saw the rapist, I imagine she would scream and wouldn't be able to speak because of the horrible memory. Also, Leo isn't the owner of the house, his dad was, and kicking a parent out of your house isn't exactly possible... Again, I'm not trying to tell you how to write your story
No that's alright! Thank you for that I need some constructive critiscizm. I understand what you're saying, but she is very very strong and has more anger than fear. Also Leo is 18 and his dad makes him pay rent anyway so yeah but thankyou for the advice
"Leo? Leo?" a female voice shouted up the stairs. I was laying on Leo as we had just finished having another round of sex. I felt him freeze when the girls voice rang out. I looked at him, "who is it?" I mouthed. He didn't reply. Then footsteps walked cautiously up the stairs. Leo got out of bed as fast as he could and gestured me to hide under the bed. I ran and slid under his double bed at the speed of light. Leo rapidly put a t-shirt and boxers on and in came the woman. From what I could see, the woman had amazing legs, she was wearing glossy red stilettos. "Leo..you naughty naughty boy..skipping school when I was off today... Wait a minute...that voice...I knew who she was... her feet stepped closer to his and were almost touching. I heard them kiss, which made me feel sick. How could he? It's not natural, and I'm right here! Has he frgotten he's only 18?! He's way too young to be making out with my teacher!
I lay underneath the bed as I listened to Leo and my teacher make out right above me. Leo, the hottest guy in the school, who just f*cked me numerous times, who told me he loved me, was right there, smooching my teacher!!! I couldn't stand this any longer. I felt them collapse onto the bed, I had to crawl out. But I was naked, and my teacher was right there. Oh sh*t. I had to go, I couldn't stand to here this anymore, I crawled out as silent as I could. I almost got to the door and stood up, I turned around to look at them, even though I knew it would murder me. I turned slowly, instantly regretting it. There she was, Miss Fera ontop of Leo, he was rubbing his hands all over her, and moaning loudly. She was making orgasmic noises and it made me cringe. I took one more step to leave the room, but the floor crooked to loud. They both flipped their heads to me... Oh cr*p.....
Miss Fera instantly got off of Leo and straightened her sl*tyy little outfit she'd put on especially for my lover. She looked at me up and down. I blushed as I was naked, but I was already red with rage so I doubt she noticed. "well...I'm up for a threesome if you are" Leo said breaking the tension. As he seductivley smiled at us. Miss Fera, walked up to him, got on top of him in such a sl*tty way, was she being serious?! She leaned down to kiss him and he moaned sexually, but just before their lips touched she threw a cold hard smack across his cheek, making it throb. She got off of him and smirked at me, picking up a towel and handing it to me. I walked over to Leo, "get dressed wh*re, we need to talk." He looked hurt, but did exactly what I said. Me, Miss and Leo walked silently downstairs. We got the the kitchen and sat down on his table and chairs. "so......" Leo sai awkwardly I shot a glare at him, I was so not turned on right now. "look...me and Leo have sex regularly....you mustn't tell a living soul about us..I could lose my job!" she pleaded. "hmmm tempting..." I said sarcastically, Leo smirked. I looked at him, he winked at me. hmm, did he prefer me? "Okay...I know Leo is incredibly hot and...soo damn goood in bed, ooo you know when he.." she began sexually moaning, this was disgusting. How could she sleep with him?! "he's only 18! You're old, it's pedophilic!!! What Leo wants...what Leo needs, is a young girl, not some old woman! Especially not a teacher!!!" I shouted I could see Leo nodding his head in the background, absorbing in our points. "well you're just a bit too young to be sleeping with an 18 year old...you are a sl*t..." she spat out. "Ladies ladies!" Leo bean to interupt. I crossed my arms, "says you!" I bitchely said, completley ignoring Leo. "you are the worst student ever!" "you are the worst teacher ever!!" BANG! Leo banged his fists on the table, me and Miss Fera...Miss Sl*t jumped and looked at him. He was about to kick one of us out.....
He looked at Miss Fera lovingly... "Sophie, we had a good run...but like Beth said, you're too old for me. I'm sorry I let it go on for so long." he said then turning to smile at me, I looked away stubbornly. "besides I already kicked my dad out for her.." he began but she stood up forcefully interupting him rudely. "so you got lucky this time...don't think I won't do something about it at school." se spat out to me. "oh I'm not worrying about that...because I'm a witness of almost rape. And I'm sure the principle would love to hear about this..." I snidely whispered. She looked as if she was about to cry and ran out of the house. Me and Leo watched her as her legs trotted off. "so...how about another round?" Leo flirtasiously said. I turned around slowly..."you are joking right?!" I said, disgusted. He looked as if I was talking to someone else. "me?" he asked gobsmacked. "yes..YOU! How could you Leo? Cheating on me? And with a Teacher?!?! Honestly Leo..i swear you're too hot for your own good!" I said..I was not impressed. "well....techinally I was cheating on her...." he began "that's not my point!" I growled. "Leo...I think I need some time away from you...don't call me for a while.." I said throwing the towel off my body and running upstairs to get changed. "well Beth...you don't realise...I really am into you." he followed me up the stairs. I rolled my eyes.."oh give it a rest Leo. All you want from me is sex!" I said angrily. "no! It's not just sex...it's...making love. Now call me old fashioned but that what sex is really all about...right?" he said softly whilst coming up behind me and hugging me romantically... Oh no...here came the charm.....
.....rly? I love your writing and everything but this is just really weird now :/ Like in my perspective.. I also agree. If she saw the rapist, she probably would've reacted better. If you want my opinion, I'm not truly enjoying how the story line is going