I have made my final decision to keep on writing this story with the same contents as I had been planning before. I have read books while knowing the ending and still enjoyed every single page of writing, so I don't see why others couldn't. If I get 3 posts in the next 15 minutes, I'll update in the next hour!
ATTENTION: I have an announcement! READ MY OTHER STORY, "Mistakes"!!!! ~~~~~<><><><>~~<><><><>~~~~~ IN THE PRESENT Liv's Point of View ============================== My body was absolutely immobile. The world constantly spun, mocking me. The last thing I remembered doing was panting, moaning, and finally letting out one ear-splitting scream regardless of what my mother would say. I needed help. I woke up to a blurry scene. I could make out almost nothing. When the world had come back into focus, I realized that my whole family-excluding Dylan-swarmed my hospital bed, overwhelming my already cluttered mind. "She's up!" A familiar voice echoed inside my head. They all gathered around me even closer, causing me to hyperventilate. Ever since what had happened 3 years ago, I developed an actual fear of closed spaces. They called it claustrophobia. See, there was a time when someone had attempted raping me and succeeded, instead of failing, like Dylan had. Just the thought of my memories of the incident killed me. FLASHBACK: "I'm going to go out and get buy breakfast from McDonald's for the man I brought home yesterday. You better not try something, you little b****. If you do, you're going to be dead." Mom threatened. I let out a laugh when she left. I couldn't even believe that I had came out of that... that... that MONSTER. Even looking at her made me want to die. My thoughts were soon interrupted by the man that woman had brought into the house last night. "Hey, pretty lady," the hungover man in his late 20s joked. "Don't." I tried to end the conversation. "Ohhhh, you don't like me!" He bellowed and chuckled. His name was Tyler-at least that's the name that woman had moaned all night, so I could only assume. Tyler slowly approached me like a drunk pirate. To say the least, he fit the part, with his after shave, ear piercing, and untucked button down shirt. He danced mockingly towards me and took an aggressive hold on my wrist. I flicked my wrist, making him lose his grip, but he caught it once again, but this time, he wasn't intending on letting go. Tyler took a hold of my shoulder and pinned me down on our already wearing out couch. I moaned out in pain as the springs under the cushions were pushing up against my back. This was the kind of thing that could and did scar the life of an innocent 14-year old. "HELP! HELP! PLEASE!" I screamed again and again, but nobody's seemed to hear or care. It became crystal clear to me that no one was going to help. Because of this, I knew I had to fight for myself. I kicked him between his legs, causing him to roll off from on top of my onto the floor. I sped to the bathroom, tears still in my eyes. My heart pounded so hard I could feel it in my ears. Hiding in the bathtub with the curtain closed, I waited to hear his voice. Instead, I heard the sickening noise of someone kicking down the bathroom door. ><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>< TO BE CONTINUED
This is very hard to be critical about, you could try short sentences to build suspense. Your style of writing is perfectly fine now. Always good to vary it up a little though from time to time for readers interest Seems everyones hooked already however!