Chuck Norris sleeps with a nightlight on. Not because he is afraid of the dark, but because the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
Chuck norris does not sleep, he waits. Chuck norris' tears can cure cancer. Too bad he never cried. When the boogeyman goes to sleep, he checks his closest for chuck norris. Chuck Norris has already been to mars; that's why there's no signs of life.
when chuck norris gives you the finger he isnt flipping you off he is telling you how many seconds you have to live.
the reason there are ghost is because chuck norris is killing people faster then death can process them.