Here goes nothing... 9am "People always say that it hurts at night and apparently screaming into your pillow at 3am is the romantic equivalent of being heartbroken. But sometimes, it's 9am on a Tuesday morning and you're standing at the kitchen bench waiting for the toast to pop up And the smell of dusty sunlight and earl grey tea makes you miss them so much you don't know what to do with your hands." ~ It had been close to a year since I had heard the birds chirp outside. Everything had changed so much in that year. I remember the smell of your coffee in the morning, wrinkling my nose at the stench. I remember the song you sang in the shower, the smell of your shampoo. Now you only haunt me and our house. Everything was ours, our home, our work, our family. I should have read the signs when it was becoming yours. Your space, your side of the bed, your personal time. I should have known that 'our' was part of 'your'. The plans were made for us to be united. Our names would become one. Mr and Mrs, for better and for worse. The dress and tux were picked out and we were putting aside paychecks to pay for a reception. I knew exactly what 'your' meant when I got to the church and no one had seen you arrive. I wasn't in our home any more. It was my tomb with your ghost reminding me of what I had lost. All your clothes were gone, a spare sock hidden under the bed covers. You left your mobile phone and your ring and a note that read "Goodbye". It was that day my world turned black and white, boring and dull, nothing to look forward to. The kettle on the stove screaming my name yanks me from my reverie, reminding me of the gaping absence. I pour the steaming water into a mug, the smell of tea perforating the air. Mail sliding through the slot, the click of the metal and the thump of paper hitting the mat, right on time as always. Absently, the bills move from the floor to the kitchen counter, just like always. A colourful ribbon draws my eyes in the black and white world of my life. Glancing at it, the elegant writing of a wedding invitation regarding you and who you left me for. My heart shatters all over again at the sight of your name. The emptiness swallowing me whole and the hope I'd clung to for so long vanished in a blink, leaving only one option left. Living this life without you is unbearable. Knowing that you would never be mine left only one option. The rope on our tire swing catches my eye from the kitchen window. I never get to see the letter beneath, canceling the wedding and a handwritten apology saying that you were coming home again. ~ Thank you for reading! Let me know what you think, good or bad. ?
If anyone has wattpad follow me @yea_no ^~^ I'm planning on starting a fanfic soon and I'd really appreciate it xx