Ok this is fecking perfect! You have very good detailed characters, although it would be nice to hear descriptions of the area around the characters. It helps readers paint a picture in their minds if what your saying, and better understand the characters. very very attractive characters might I add. That Mr. Hall is quite.. Yum!!! Very good description of him. this will probably be mentioned in readers paradise nice work yet again
why thank you Auntie I wanted Mr. Hall to be "delish" you'll freak when you figure out what he is
The bell rang, and I froze. School was over for everyone else, but detention was beginning for me. I watched in agitation as the students happily walked to their lockers, get their bags and leave with their friends. I just leaned against my locker until the hallway traffic cleared. It looked like a rushing sea of students, quite literally, since the uniforms were navy blue and green. "Good luck..." I heard a voice call. I turned to see Jade salute me, before putting her music on full blast, causing the glass on the oak trophy display nearby to shake. I sighed. Fridays were always bright and happy. The weather was actually bearable outside for once, and I couldn't even enjoy it until an hour later. Grabbing my backpack and whatever minuscule amount of pride I had left, I walked down the hall, and knocked on Mr. Hall's door. "Come in." he answered. I tentatively grabbed the bronze doorknob, and turned it to the right, the door opening silently. Mr. Hall was sitting as his desk, correcting work. I took a step inside the classroom, and mentally rolled my eyes. Of course, it was empty. How awkward I felt! Nobody else was there except for Mr. Hall and I. I was silent for a moment, before I spoke up. "Uh... Mr. Hall?" "Hmm?" he looked up. "Persephone." "I'm here for"- "Detention, I know." he said, picking up a worksheet from his desk, and handing it to me. "Complete this. And since I know you'll finish it before the hour's up, I'll give you more work to do after, okay?" he gave me a smile. I reached out and grasped the paper, my lips parting in shock as I felt an electric current surge through me. My hand had only grazed his, yet I felt that sort of reaction? "T-thank you..." I mumbled. Mr. Hall only arched an eyebrow at my expression, smirking, before returning to his desk and resuming correcting papers. Was I going crazy? Surely he felt that too... or did I imagine it? I sat down in my seat, and slung my messenger bag over the chair. Flipping it open, I took out a pencil and sharpener, beginning the worksheet. It was extremely difficult to focus, the windows let in too much sun. And I could hear kids shouting and laughing outside, enjoying the day while I was stuck in school for an hour. Not to mention the fact that Mr. Hall was so... annoying. At least, that's what I forced myself to believe. "Persephone?" "...huh?" I responded, looking up in surprise. Mr. Hall was standing by my desk, a curious expression on his face. "How can you finish the assignment with a broken pencil?" "Broken...?" I glanced at my pencil, to notice I had been gripping it too tightly, and the graphite point snapped. How long have I been sitting there without noticing? He sighed, and took my hand, placing a ballpoint pen there. I tensed, that feeling coursing through my veins again. Mr. Hall didn't notice, or at least he pretended not to. "Use this..." "...Thanks..." I stuttered. "Do you need any help?" "Help? Why?!" I gasped. I never needed academic help before. I was a straight A student. "Well, for starters, you've been staring into space for a good ten minutes." he smirked, leaning over my shoulder to look at my paper. "That, and all of these answers are incorrect…" he murmured. I felt my heart rate speed up. He didn't need to be so close- What did he just say?! I did those problems perfectly! "What?! How can these be wrong"- "Multiply by the reciprocal of x, not y." he said, taking my hand and writing with the pen I still held. I could almost feel him smile, and I looked at my paper incredulously. "Three squared isn't six." he suppressed a laugh. I grumbled, shooting him a look. "Any reason why you're making such silly mistakes?" he asked amusedly. "I can't concentrate." I answered. "You're one of my best students, Persephone. Why can't you concentrate?" "It's too loud"- "Look outside." I glanced out the window, to see that the leaf covered schoolyard was deserted. Not a soul was left outside. "Th-the sun"- As if the sun heard me, and decided to be a jackáss today, a few clouds rolled into the previously cloudless sky, and covered the sun, making the bright glare on the windows disappear. "If it's completely silent, and the light's bearable, what is it making my student distracted... and blush...?" he murmured, locking eyes with me. My hand shot up to my cheek in horror, and I cringed. My face was burning hot. I didn't want to know how red it looked. I instantly stood up, and rushed out of the classroom, bursting outside into the slightly chilled air. I couldn't take it! Mr. Hall... he was so... --------------------------------------------------- what have we here? Flirting?