------ Hey girl, I just noticed, your fine ass that looks so perkish... Why, why, why don't we get together, get some drinks and hook up in this fine clear weather? Girl, I just noticed, that beautiful face and slim little figure... Why, why, why don't we get together, go out, get dinner, I don't wanna linger... No rush, no tricks, no kink, just the two of us, falling for eachother... The world revolves around us, like two puzzle pieces that's perfect for one another, like peanut butter jelly, molding together... We're two lovers, like no other, the world can't seperate us, can't make us suffer... Block out the world, reply with 'whatever', I'll hold out my hand, and we'll go undercover, I'd love you forever. Hey girl, I just noticed, that sassy demeanor, why, why, why don't we get together, drinks on me, why didn'f I discover, a girl like you so close nearby, why was I so frickin' blind? You were right behind me, I could've just turned, I guess I'm to blame, I'm not that clever... Hey girl, I just noticed, your flowing dark hair and your bright blue eyes, why, why, why don't we get together, you can give me a call whenever... I don't care, as long as you're there, I'd stand nearby. So why, why, why don't we get together sometime? ----- Cross out. Highlight. Cross out. Cross out. Cross out. Highlight. Cross out. Highlight. Crossout. Cross out. Cross out. Cross out. Cross out. Cross out. Three. Three potential boyfriends out of fourteen? Damn. Not only am I a shallow asshole that judges men by their appearance and reputation, I have the decency to compare them together. It's embarassing, isn't it? Anyway. Setting myself up with those three in a blind date would be perfect... ----- Name: Potential Boyfriend One. Profile: Obnoxious and egotistical ginger haired brute with no sense of selflessness, stuck up snob, plain rude, and that's his God forsaken charm. Blue eyes, freckled infested pale skinned boy. He likes to dissect frogs when bored. An interesting person, if I do say so myself. Comment from Susan: 'Wait... You're interested in future serial killers?' ----- Name: Potential Boyfriend Two Profile: Mannered and sensitive young man, wears glasses, is a bibliphile, quiet and likes the library, rich ass family, dark haired guy, likes long walks on the beach and a fancy dinner down at the expensive looking fusion restaurant downtown... Keeps to himself, has a stoic experession and is madly in love with Twilight. Ahem. Ahem. Comment from Susan: 'Are you sure he's not gay?' ------ Name: Potential Boyfriend Three Profile: Heart throb God forsaken blonde haired sex symbol of Eaton High, blue eyed bastard with a stuck up snobbish personality, puts up a gentlemanly polite poshy façade when inside he's a brutish devil. Manipulative and persuasive, gets what he fucking wants if he demands it. His charm? His looks and his words. Can be sincere if he thinks you're worth his time. Comment from Susan: 'He's out of your league.' ----- Journal Entry 295: Perfect... PURRRRRFECT. I will now commence the— *Ahem* What I meant to say is, I will now seduce Potential Boyfriend One with my feminine wills. He will be my first shot at testing out my newly developed body. I will need to go shopping later. A nice seductive outfit for my future career as a temptress in a run down stripper house, nice lacy undergarments, lotion, face cleanser, hand cream, spray tan, outrageously high heels, red lipstick, pink blush, mascara, silver eyeshadow, more makeup, and hopefully latex condoms if he's a pervert like everybody says he is. ---- Romantic comedy. Don't judge. .-.
Hey, Potential Boyfriend One was a replica of my third crush two years ago, don't hate. Potential Boyfriend Two, however, is my ideal boyfriend. ._. Potential Boyfriend Two is just a random stud I decided to throw in. ._.
BEWARE, THIS PART OF STORY IS A LITTLE MORE *Ahem* THAN THE OTHERS. ._. Rated T at the most. .-. ---- "... Hi, Taylor!" Oh God. Oh God. Oh God! Remember what the doctor told you, Taylor, and REMAIN CALM. Think of fat, ugly old women on the beach, and don't let her curvaceous body get to you! Breathe! Breathe! In! Out! In! Out! In— "HI, TAYLOR." "What do you want, hag?" "Gasp! I was just going to ask you if you wanted to go out... You know, for a movie..." NO, NOOOO, NO, IT'S INFLATING! DAMN YOU, DAMN YOU STEFANI, DAMN YOU. "Is that a yes? You're scrunching yoir eyebrows up and you're covering your pants with your... Ohmai." God damnit. Steph's eyes were now travelling across the outlines of my pants as if it was the most interesting thing she's ever seen. "... Um... I'll see you at seven?" "Oh! Okay." Her eyes immediately were on mine, and the glazed over confused look she had on was gone. She smiled before turning around, her perky ass moving up and down like two toasty cinnamon buns— AHHH, NO, BREATHE TAYLOR BREATHE! BREATHE! BREATHE GOD DAMNIT BREATHE! ---- Journal Entry 296: That was easy. Above that, Taylor had a— *ahem* Anyway, it seems as if these latex condoms aren't needed. I know how mother has been stressing about her love life, and I decided to spice it up by putting these in her drawer! Her husband's a pervert, anyway. I can't WAIT for the movies. MANIPULATION PLAN, BEGIN! ---- "... Must... Focus... On... ACHIEVING THIS GOD FORSAKEN HIGH SCORE!" My eyes were glued onto the screen as I tried to fight the damned goblins. THEY WERE EATING MY SHROOMS, DAMNIT. MY SHROOMS! "... Oh, huh." The door creaked open and my sister walked in with all her naked glory— OH SHIT. "GOD DAMNIT WOMAN, PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!" "Why?" "DID YOU READ THE FUCKING SIGN?! NO NUDISTS ALLOWED IN THIS AREA OF THE HOUSE! WHY ARE YOU HERE ANYWAY?!" "I need to borrow some... condoms." "What? Why?" "... I've ran—" "Okay, shut up! I don't have any condoms!" "What?! I saw a whole supply of them sitting in the drawer!" "Maybe Guadalupe stole them! Don't frickin' judge me!" "The maid or your creepy piercing faced friend?!" "I DON'T KNOW!" I pushed my sister out, closing my eyes in embarassment as I felt my hand graze her mewbs. *Silently in heaven, but screaming in rage on the outside* ---- ._. What? I'm a pervert, I know.