Why I don't I believe?

Kay, before everyone wants to get on my case about starting stories and not finishing them, please shut the hell up. I need criticizing, because I think I suck at writing. So before you post 'bump' think about what you like and don't like and what I can change. =D Thanks.
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I simply don't believe.
I don't believe in Santa, nor the Easter Bunny.
I don't believe in Fairies, nor legends or myths.
I've found a solution to each childhood lie easily through my eleven years of life.
Easter was easy.
The gift I had gotten was seen in the craft room just a few weeks earlier.
Christmas?
My mother's boyfriend said he,'Had to take it back to Costco because it was broken.'
Kind of heartbreaking to hear that? No.
Fairies? What about the Tooth Fairy, Yaneth?
It's fake. It's fake as all the Kardashians'.
I lose a tooth, put it under my pillow ONCE and my mother came and put a dollar bill under my pillow. And she had a jar of my other sibling's teeth in it as well.
What about the Lochness Monster, Yaneth?
It's not real, and neither is Kim's life. Or love life to be more precise. It's just a silly little piece of cardboard.
Well, surely you must believe in Fairy Tales, and happy endings.....?
Never, have I ever believed in happy endings, and prince charmings'.
It's all a bunch of fake I.D's.

 

I sat up in my room, reading the third Twighlight book, Eclipse.
I laughed at how the author made a story about a vampire dating a mortal, and a were-wolf wanting the same girl.
I wrote down the the irony of how the vampire would've sucked the girl dry of her blood, and the were-wolf would've torn her to shreds on a full moon.
I was the girl to read Harry Potter, and some dragon books. I only let Harry Potter slide because it was amazing.
Reading the scenes from Eclipse made me howl in laughter.

I rolled my eyes and sighed when I glanced at the clock.... 8:47...
I put my bookmark in, and tossed my book down and prepared to have a dream I was scared of for the first time....

 

=D Thank you Cyber and Lily.

 

In the dream, everything seemed so surreal.....
Even in life I have nothing but regular and surreal moments that scare me. The surreal moment means to feel out of body or place for a certain amount of time.
Anyway, back to the creepy dream I had.

In the dream, everything was somehow stretched out. I was walking, and as if I controlled the dream, I was on the same page as I was in real life.
I'm going insane, and my mother is getting my ear piercings removed. My mother's boyfriends idea, of course. My siblings are still jerks, even though they're all younger than I am.

But then, it turned into something else.
My brother—the one I was related to— was in jail, for being abusive to his wife and slapping her.
My sister was in prison for trying to steal a diamond, lying through her teeth about it.
My other brother—related to my 'sister'— was unemployed and had been fired for failing to get the numbers right while helping a client in the bank.
And I was a mother, explaining to my two kids that it didn't exist. Nothing exists. Not the Easter Bunny, not Santa, no monsters were real. It was a little boy and a girl I was talking to.

After it all went black, it was time for me to get up and go get ready for school.

 

:3 Thank you!

 

I woke up with a jump, sweating to death. My auburn eyes searched in the dark for the moment of truth if I was still alive, and not six feet under rocks and dirt.

My eyes scanned the room, seeing everything in place. My walls were still the same puppy-paws brown color they were every morning.
My bed was still a black blob of blankets, pillows and sheets.
I still had my porcelain doll collection sitting peacefully on the shelves.
Everything was the same, and so was life.
I was still the eleven year old girl that had no spirit, no happiness and no thrills.
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Before I do the next update, I would like to say I do not own Twighlight nor Harry Potter.
Twighlight belongs to Stephanie Meyer and Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling.
Thank you to everyone giving me advice and criticism.

 

I did my regular routine, I got ready for school, got dropped off, went to all my classes, got picked up from that hellish environment and my mom and I were discussing irregular stuff.
".....How was school, Yaneth?" she questioned me.
"Fine." I answered, still quiet.
"Yaneth?" my mother said my name in a questioning tone.
"Yes, mother?"
"Do you have the tiniest faith in God?"
".....No...."
"Well, I'm not mad at you if you don't believe in God, Yaneth."
"What?"
"I'm not mad, just don't let your grandparents hear that...."
"Okay then...." I said, swiftly grabbing my binder and bringing it with me inside the house.

I checked my phone, there were multiple messages. I checked the one from my boyfriend first, and started crying automatically.

I was done. I don't believe in anything, not even love.

 

~Timeskip, about two years after turning twelve. Age 14~

Here I am, in school again. This time I'm in high school. I'm changing in the locker rooms, talking with my friend Lily.
"Yaneth," she started."You look like you're wearing a emotionless mask."
"That's because I am, Lily." I groaned, my face pale, and white as always.
The girls' locker rooms were pretty normal. On the walls in big, baby blue letters it has 'Lady Mustangs' painted. Our lockers were kind of a pasty blue color with food dye.
I sat down on the dark blue bench, holding my pen and my purple binder.
"Why are you so.....blank?" she asked me, waving her hand in my face.

"Because my head hurts." I lied through my teeth easily. My brown hair was like a fighting factor against my icy heart.
My hair, my eyes, they all made me look sweet and cheery. My icy heart repelled everyone if I try my hardest.

The blank look on my face made me look like—to the teachers—paying attention. Except I was actually thinking.
I realized how I've rejected 4 guys because of my one broken heart.

Have you ever seen those drawings of a broken heart, where there's a stitch here, a broken nail over there?
I scoffed as a stupid girl named Emma answered a question incorrectly, and I heard my name.
"Okay Yaneth," my English teacher seemed to snare. "since your laughing, where was the Bus Boycott Mrs. Parks was in?"
I howled in laughter, "Any idiot would know it was in Alabama in 1955." I answered, glaring at the stupid girl.
She hissed in my direction, knowing she'll screw something up for me.

 

I walked out of history class, thinking of one person. Nick Thompson, the boy that was Starstruck for Chayse. I gagged, sitting next to her and Nick, eating my cookie.
Chayse and I were BEST FRIENDS, and it would strike her dead to hear her life-long friend was in love with her boyfriend.
I couldn't help but stare at him-Oh wait. That's Chayse, blowing up my phone again.

"Yaaaanneeeth!" she squeaked into my ear.
"Yes, Reyes?"
I called everyone by their last name, even Chayse.
"Neigh. You know what happened today? You know what I found out?" she spat, unhappy. Probably something about Nick, or Trisha talking smack-jam behind her back.

I sighed,"What did you find out Reyes?"
"That-That some chick likes Nick!" she growled, slamming her fist on the lunch table.
"Chill out, who said that?" I asked, holding her arms still.
"T-Trisha!" she cried, now sobbing into my pale, pasty white shoulder. I looked like a vampire.
"Oh...Ew." I groaned. Trisha was and always will be a pain in the neck, and a filthy liar. But sadly, this was true.

I don't know how I trusted anyone or even myself to be in love with someone again.

 

Bump. Working on update.