This is my attempt at a story from first person.. Oh boy. Well, here goes nothing. ------------------------------ I don't even know where to start. Well, let's start with me. I'm Kyler Allen Boykins. Some people just call me Ky, it doesn't matter. I'm 17, almost 18 in my senior year of high school. I live with my parents in a small house just a few miles away from school, so I walk everyday with my best friend, Sara. Sara Ann Lowman. My best friend since, well, forever. She's actually the reason why my whole life gets flipped totally upside down. Before I get into that, let me tell you a little about Sara. This girl is the cutest, sweetest, most bubbly girl you will ever meet. But at the snap of your fingers, she could easily kick someone's ass if she needed to. Anyways, she has the biggest brown eyes, which just make me melt. Brown eyes are just my weakness. Her hair just always falls perfectly, just making her look amazing every day. She's gorgeous, just to sum it up. But I don't like her like that. Don't even think I do. She's my best friend. I can't ruin that. Enough with the introductions. Let me just tell you the story about how my life got completely turned upside down. ------------------------------ Well? It's just a short little intro. Any feedback or comments or anything is nice. :3 just writing this for the heck of it. If it ends up going well and people actually read, I'll update hopefully once a day. Anyways, comments?
Doesn't look bad. I enjoy the fact you spell correctly, most of the time, but I mess up often, it's all good. I don't know about the introduction part, it's a little too straightforward. Leaving something to the imagination, you know? We'll see as time passes. I will be reading, however.
I think it's a pretty good start. Update and also love how you described what she looked like and your just describing things lol.
I just typed up a whoooole long update and it deleted. I'm gonna go cry now and then rewrite it. Hopefully it'll be up soon.
Re-typed it! I was more careful this time. Here it goes. ------------------------------ I started off my morning as usual. Get up at 6, take a quick shower, and go downstairs to eat breakfast. A bowl of Lucky Charms and a protein shake. Did I mention I'm a huge workout fanatic? Well I am. Each day after school, I work out for a hour and a half just for the hell of it. I don't play any sports. I just wanna look damn good. After I eat, I head upstairs and get dressed. That usually consists of either a t-shirt or a flannel shirt with either jeans or khaki shorts. Plus Converse. Always, always, always Converse. Anyways, after I'm finished getting dressed I just run a comb through my shaggy brown hair and I'm ready to go. I grab all of my things for school, and I'm out my door by 6:30 each day, on my way over to Sara's. We've walked to school together every day since freshman year. Except for when it's too cold, raining, or snowing. Any other time we just walk together, enjoying each other's company. Today though, something about her seemed off. I decided to investigate. "Hey boo, what's going on? You seem down." We always call each other names like that. But I swear, we aren't dating. "Oh, nothing. Just tired," she answered absentmindedly. "Oh please. We've been friends for ten years. You can't sneak past me with that 'I'm tired' bullshit. C'mon, you can always talk to me." "I've been thinking... What if I just, disappeared?" I stared at her and demanded, "Explain. Now." "I mean, no one notices me. I only have you. Disappearing wouldn't affect anyone." The only having me part wasn't completely true. But it wasn't a lie. Sara's mom had died when she was 4 in a car accident. Sara had watched from the backseat as a semi completely crushed her mom at a 4-way stop, killing her on impact. Somehow, Sara hadn't been hurt. Well, physically. She had been emotionally scarred and it still affects her, 13 years later. After the crash and the loss of her mom, Sara's dad turned to drugs and alcohol to try and cope. He didn't want much to do with Sara, and only provided her with the basic things she needed. She's a strong girl, and hasn't let it get to her. Except for today, apparently. I looked at her as we walked and told her, "You can't go and disappear on me. I'd notice, and I wouldn't be able to go on without you. Other people would notice too, trust me. A girl like you doesn't just disappear without people noticing." That got her to smile. "Thanks Ky. I don't know where I'd be without you." "In the psych ward, of course." That got me a playful punch in the shoulder. By now, we were at the school. Sadly, our lockers are on opposite sides of the school. We said our goodbyes, hugged, and headed off to our lockers. I get to see her again third period, so I'm not too disappointed. This girl is just to damn cute. Her little giggle just makes me laugh. Just the thought of her is enough to drive me wild. Any time I hear her name, I can't help but smile. I was completely lost in my thoughts and I didn't realize who I was about to run into. Sara's asshole ex boyfriend, Brett Peters. My day was just getting started, and it was going to suck. ------------------------------ Comments or anything? I appreciate anything. I'm going to have fun with this story. :3
It'll develop next update. .-. I was just getting the two major characters introduced. I'll get the story really started next time though, like I said.
Don't ever say just. Never, ever again. I sense a love story. It's nice so far, though. But we both know you can do better. Push the envelope, Babycakes!!!
Noted. And eh. To a point, possibly. I'm working at it! Writing isn't my number one skill. .-. But hey, I'm trying.
Lol. True! And you're doing better than a lot of people do. But I know for sure it's not your 100%, Hun. You can do it!