Too much gaming, anime, and awesomeness does shit to you. I did this randomly. ._. Rated M for cussing... I can't help it. Whenever I think of the two, they're like... just... people who cuss excessively. >.< -- "I can friggin' stay here! This is where hookers go!" "Tch. You look like a hooker already, so why not just-" "WHAT DID YOU FUCKING JUST CALL ME?!" ... *gulp* -- It took only one night for him to lose his moral code. One. Night. Overindulging in booze and throwing up on carpets was what Ly was doing until the bartender threatened to kick them both out. The Rogue only sat on the stool, swirling around his seat like five year old child. The girl next to him ran her hand through her matted black and green hair and sighed. "Bartender! ANOTHER SHOT." The bartender grumbled, but nonetheless poured the some-what wasted man a glass of vodka. "Eh... Ly, I seriously think you've had enough." "Nooooooooo..." Ly took a giant gulp of the alcohol, much to the girl's dismay. "Please?" A long moment passed and Ly finally gave in to her pleas. How could he ignore her green puppy eyes? They got him every time. "... Fine." Slamming a ten-dollar bill on the counter, Ly and the girl walked out, with the girl being his support as he stumbled around like a fool. -- "... M'am, I simply cannot rent a room to a minor... with... him," The clerk pointed to Ly with distaste. He cringed with apparent dislike at the fact a beautiful young lady would choose an unkempt beast like Ly as a companion. "Please, mister! There's no other hotels to go to! I have extra money!" The girl held out a bag full of gold coins. Ly moaned and shoved his hands into his jean pockets, grimacing. "Like I said, I can't trust a minor to be in a room with... with... a Rogue. It's unacceptable!" "Ughhh... Blaise, can we go now? I'm fucking tiiiirrreeedddd." The clerk then glanced at Ly and then back at Blaise, as to prove his point. Growing frustrated each passing second with having to deal with both a drunk and stupid Ly and a stubborn ass clerk, Blaise decided to use her last resort. 'God damnit.' Blaise glanced backwards to make sure nobody was looking at the strange couple. "... Look here, mister." Blaise slid a couple of gold coins over to the clerk slowly, as to make sure he got her point. "Both of us are tired, and he's not capable of doing anything rash and stupid. See my sword here?" Blaise pointed to the sword strapped to her back. "I'll slice his head clean off his neck if he dares to touch me." The intensity of it all only made the clerk gulp, but he still remained solemn and unmoving while standing stiff on the spot. "... Still no. Sorry, Hunter. I can't." "Gah! What the hell are we going to do know?!" "... Let me handle it, Blaise." Blaise only groaned and clutched her head in her hand. If he fails, they'll be homeless. "Ahem." The clerk only stared at him with mild interest while Blaise walked around in circles, praying to God inwardly that he'd let them stay. "Hey, baby..." And time stopped. Blaise only gaped at the drunken Ly with wide eyes, and then slouched and sunk into a couch, visibly uncomfortable and distressed. 'Fuck. We're going to get kicked out.' But, the clerk began giving even more attention to what Ly had to say. "You see my friend over there?" The clerk nodded. "She wants to know if you think I look cute." Blaise groaned. Why did Ly have to throw her into his stupid pick up lines? "Oh? Well tell your friend that I think you're absolutely adorable..." Jaw dropping was not something Blaise did a lot. She was rarely surprised. But this, this was insane. 'I swear he was acting as if Ly was a piece of trash when I was speaking to him!' "Oh? Not as good as you, babe. Are you sure you're not a parking ticket?" "Last time I checked, no. Why?" "'Cuz you got fine written alllll over your body..." A soft giggle came from the clerk and Blaise began rolling her eyes. "Tell me more..." The clerk ran his fingers over Ly's leather vest, and Ly only smirked like the drunk moron he was. "If beauty were time, you'd be eternity, sugar." And now Blaise had it. Using her hands as sock puppets, she pretended her Left was the clerk and her Right was Ly. 'Oh! I'm so sexy so I'm going to use pick up lines to seduce you, but I'm enjoying the moment so I'll take it niiiiice and sloooowww~!' 'You're so cute, tell me more lies so I can feel better about myself! Lalalalalala!' Another giggle. Blaise turned redder each passing moment. Why was she getting red? Hell, not even she knew. It was just something about the conversation that made her want to rip her hair off. "So, do you feel like handing over the keys?" "How about... NO?!" -- "God damnit! You put on your seduction technique and we still get kicked out?!" Ly said nothing. Only kicked a pebble at a trashcan and began walking. "Hey! Listen to me, you son of a bitch!" "Shut up. We're going to a hotel." "What?! Why didn't you say so earlier?! Would've saved us the damn trouble!" Ly shrugged. -- "I can't friggin' stay here! This is where hookers go!" "Tch. You look like a hooker already, so why not just-" "WHAT DID YOU FUCKING JUST CALL ME?!" Ly stuffed his hands in his pockets and looked away. "Damn straight you look away! I swear, if there weren't any people here, or the fact that you're drunk, I'd kick your ass soooooo bad!" The alcohol was beginning to wear off, however. "Haha. I'm sooo scared. What's the little girl gunna do, huh? Kick me in the balls? Guess what? Since the last incident, I'M WEARING METAL UNDERWEAR." "THINK YOUR BALLS OF STEEL CAN HANDLE MY HAMMER OF PAIN?! HUH?!" Ly shut up. Blaise was a feisty bitch, even for her height. She was 5'3 while Ly was 6'2. "... Let's just go in... I'm too tired for an argument." "Agreed." -- The hotel room was quite nice, she had to admit. Complimentary chocolates and champagne. Even the bed looked comfy! ... Minus the fact it was shaped like a swan with curtains dangling from the ceiling. Too romantic, man. Too romantic. "... How did you even know about this place, anyway?" "... The clerk knows me well." "... Oh. Do you take women here often?" "... Sometimes." "Oh. Why did you try to seduce the other clerk?" Ly shrugged. "Meh. I'm an attention whore. Sluts make me feel good." "... Oh. Are you gay?" "... Nah." "... Oh. Okay." An awkward silence hung around the two. "... Well, I'm just gonna use the bathroom." "Don't let the door hit you on the ass when you walk in!" "Sh-shut up!" -- Blaise P.O.V. The shower ran while I removed the hairband that tied my hair. My precious sword and bag was lying on the tiled floor, along with my packet-attached belt that stored pills and medicine. "..." ... Damnit. Lysander was such a... A jackass! Why did he have to make me blush? My cheeks hurt... the red's making me look like a tomato. I swear if he wasn't my partner, he'd be crying out in pain while I sat on his pretzel-shaped body using my gadgets to play Samurai Fight. "... Hey, are you still in there, Blaise?" "Yeah... I am. Go away, Ly!" "Yeesh. Fine. Whatever. Go do whatever girls do." "Hmph." -- Thirty minutes. Ly stared at the bathroom door with brooding eyes. Boredom lingered around him. What would he do? Drink more wine? Nah. Blaise would rip his face off. And Ly was pretty sure that the chocolates had wine in them too. ... Oh how he craved alcohol right now. "... Damnit." The shower kept running. "How much longer, princess?! I'm covered in pixie blood and dirt right now!" "Well, I was covered in dragon blood! You know how dragon blood slowly turns the green dye in my hair to white!" "... So... How long?" "... Meh. I dunno." And then she became quiet. "... Can I have some chocolates?" "Whatever. Just don't touch the champagne. I'll need it later." This got Ly staring at the bathroom door with much wider blue eyes. Since when did Blaise drink? Was it a new habit? "Oh, and leave some chocolates for me!" Who cares. He was going to take only two, anyway. -- "FORK OVER THE BOTTLE AND THE BOX, LY." Ly laid on the bed staring at the pink ceiling. "... I didn't even touch the bottle." "Oh. Okay." "... That reminds me. Why ask me so many questions? Ooohhh... Does feisty little Blaise take an interest to Ly?" "No! What the hell, man?" The pink that tinted her cheeks said otherwise. Of course, Blaise had been with many men before of many species. Ranging from vampires to goblins, you name it. But not once had she given two shits about them when they broke it off. Nope. But then the subject turned to Ly. As a duo, they had nothing more than a professional relationship. But there were times when Blaise could only think of romance and everything related to that. And guess what? Ly always seemed to pop in her mind. The first time this happened, she slapped herself and drank an entire vial of holy water. Nothing. The second time, she screamed and pinched herself. The THIRD time she fantasized about a naked Ly, she bit a pebble and crushed it with her teeth. Her mind dismissed it as hormones. Truth was she was slightly infatuated with him. Who wasn't? Even nobles stared at him sometimes when he made a grand entrance, shirtless and covered in dirt and blood. Blaise only stood next to him with minor injuries while he walked like a fucking asshole over to the royalties to receive his medal. And during these times was when she'd fume with pure rage. Of course, many stared at Blaise. But not as much as they stared at Ly. Many thought it was jealousy. It was true, she was jealous. Jealous of all those girls he blew kisses to. "Snap out of it, Blaise!" "Whut." "... Whatever, Blaisey-bear. Don't run to me when you're in desperate need of a man." And then from a tomato red, Blaise's cheeks turned crimson red. "You are such a Goddamn annoying bastard." "That's why you love me, and my impeccable abs." "... Whatever. Just go take a shower already." "MY PLEASURE!" And then the damn Rogue walked into the bathroom strutting his junk in that stupid fighting-gear of his. -- "Hey, Blaise. Did you dr-" The bottle was half-empty with a bunch of chocolate wrappers lying on the floor. "... Ohhhhh... shit." "What the hell you staring at?" "..." "My boobs?! Are you staring at my boobs?!" Five minutes passed and Ly only stared at her chest. "... Go to bed, Blaisey-bear. Go to bed." And then he realized, she was already asleep. So he tucked himself in and hugged her like a body pillow, murmuring to himself before he fell asleep. "You're a fucking idiot, Blaise." -- OhmyGodthisiswhyyoushouldnevermakemeplaygameslikewoworI'llgetstupidinspirationandwritesomethingsocrappylikethis.
This...ispurefreakinggeniuslikeicantevenputitinwordsohmygoshithinkibrokemylaughboxandyoushouldnoscratchthatyoumustcontinueitoriwillfreakingfreakout.
Holly sh*t! Your a fcking amazin writer! Write more, write more!!! Your like number one on my favorites rite now hehe
Every time I read TO THE HOOKER HOTEL for some very strange readon my mind is trying to make a jingle out of it!