Hey this is my first story please don't hate Sometimes I find myself staring at the wall, the simple white wall. I keep imagining things going on behind that wall. At first I saw good things, but it kept getting worse, and worse. Now I imagine hearing screaming behind this wall. They came to check on me again. I always hear them murmuring about the girl who stares at the wall. They are talking about me. I suppose I should introduce myself. My name is Emma Ketchum. I am ten years old.i have blond hair and ice blue eyes. I am 4'9, and I weigh 78 pounds. I am the girl who stares at the wall. I am the only one that sees this. I am the only one who sees the door. I am the only one that knows. I am the only one that saw. Here I am sitting on my bed staring at the wall.[/i] This is the day [/i]I think to myself. I get off my bed and walk over to the white wall. I reach for the doorknob and open the door. What I saw next was a whole other land.
I don't like it when the looks are clichéd. Everywhere I click, every girl has blonde hair and blue eyes and is unbelievably skinny and petite. Originality, bro. Originality. You lost me at 'introduce'. I prefer it when authors don't rush the details to the looks.... Or talk about the characters the first chance they get. I also see you using the same word 'wall' over and over again. More use of descriptive words and synonyms would be nice. The first chapter was short, so I can't give much advice. :|