This is the introduction of a story I'm trying to get made into a book. Please give me your feedback! In a place known as the Grimm Realms, a miracle was happening: the miracle of life. In an area known as Darklust Forest, a new lycan cub has just been born. "It is a male." said the lycan who had delivered the cub. "Do you know of a name for it?" "Azrukhal." ,said the mother with a sense of pride. "I am glad it is a boy," said the father "he will serve well in our army." Azrukhal's mother and father were almost like two different people. Drenloch, the father, was a cold and heartless man who served as a general in the Draconian War many years ago. He was a ruthless killer, always thristy for blood and slaughtered ever draconian that stood in his way. Schiovana, the mother, was the exact opposite. She wanted nothing more than piece in the Realm and always had a smile on her face. Everything was peaceful. Just as Schiovana started to clean Azrukhal off, the unexpected happened. An extremely loud noise came bellowing out of the forest. One of Drenloch's foot soldiers came rushing into the room. "Lord Drenloch!" shouted the solider in a nervous tone "An unknown enemy is raiding the forest! What should we do?" Drenloch laughed a hearty laugh. "We are lycans! We shall fight back!" Drenloch unsheathed his blade and ran out into the forest while Schiovana handed the doctor Azrukhal and two daggers. "Keep him safe. Make sure he recieves these daggers when you see fit." She followed Drenloch outside, blade in hand. They looked around and could not believe what they were seeing. Hundreds of strange looking men were raiding the forest. The sound of steel clashing rang out through the sky. Blood was scattering everywhere over the trees and ground. Drenloch and Schiovana fought back the horde of enemies until they found what seemed to be their leader. He looked like a normal human but something was strange about him. His eyes were purple and yellow and for some reason he had what looked like a serpent coming out of his back. "I am Lavitz, ruler of the wind! You will surrender to me or die where you stand!" said the man. "Never!" shouted Drenloch. Lavitz only laughed as a swirl of wind engulfed his body and thousands of spears rained from the sky! Drenloch and Schiovana fought and endless and bloody battle but it was all for nothing. They were easily killed and their heads were mounted on a spear. Lavitz decided to leave for he did not find whatever he was looking for. He took all the remaining lycans as prisoners but there were two he did not find. The lycan who now protects Azrukhal stepped out of the hole he was hiding in and took a look around. As he looked, he saw the most horrifying thing in in the distance; the mutilated heads of Drenloch and Schiovana.
I really like this story please write more, just remember to indent for paragraphs because it all kinda gets smooshed together... So is it like in a different world with creatures? Or are there types of humans?
It IS in a different world, but there are humans. They'll be introduced later. If I write more, I'll remember to indent the paragraphes hehe.
For the sake of the readers, I will put up part 2 whenever I get the chance. Although, it may not be as long as the intro.