Mythical Beings: EXPOSED!When we're growing up we are often told stories about mythical beings that are supposed to make us look forward to something. But if you think about these stories more, and imagine what they actually would be like if they were true, you'd probably find them creepy. There is: Santa Claus Santa is supposedly an obese man who sneaks into your house through your chimney. So how does a man like him accomplish this? Does he lather himself in oil or Vaseline or something to easily slip through the chimney? And if he does, is he later covered in a layer of sticky ash? That itself has to be insanely irritating. But, that's not all. After this stranger creeps into your house, in the middle of the night no less, he runs around the house looking for a tree. Once he finds it, he leaves a little present . After leaving it, he walks around your house some more and ends up stealing your cookies. So, if he is willing to give you a gift and go through all that trouble just to get a cookie...what in the world could that gift be? * The Tooth Fairy The tooth fairy is supposedly a grown lady who dresses up and puts on fake wings and goes from house to house collecting children's teeth. She finds these teeth so valuable that she even gives kids money and gifts for it... Under their pillows. So, not only does she come and steal teeth, but she also rummages around at night in children's bedroom while they're sleeping. Ahh. And let's not forget the teeth thing! Why in the world is this lady stealing children's teeth? What does she need them for? What does she do with them? And even worse, what if the amount she's getting now stops being enough and she starts stealing teeth that haven't fallen out yet? Or teeth that are never supposed to fall out? * Rudolph The Reindeer Then there is Rudolph, yes, the one that this is sung about: Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer had a very shiny nose and if you ever saw it you would even say it glows Some people mistakenly think that Rudolph is a very special and lucky reindeer. But they are very very far from the truth. Rudolph is a very unfortunate fellow. When he was a baby deer his poor nose got infected. It was a deadly infection that took a really long time to cure. When it was finally cured, there were some side effects that the doctors couldn't cure, in particular, his red nose. He tried lotions, color injections... You name it, he's tried it, but alas, that flashlight of a nose which constantly reminds of the horrible procedures he went through never fades. The Easter Bunny The Easter Bunny is actually a mutated bunny. Mutated! How? Well, unlike most bunny's, he poops chocolate. He has his own little factory and all year long he sits above the conveyor belt doing his business, after its all collected he wraps them up in little eggs and sneaks into your house to dispose of them. So yes, when you eat chocolate on Easter, you're actually eating a mutated bunny's poop. Congratulations! The good cartoons (the ones with a * above them)were drawn by Vile The really bad ones were made by me. ️↝❥мͥɑgͣsͫ✾↜️
Growing up as a kid: Santa Clause was my Step Father The Tooth Fairy was my Mother Rudolph was my Dog The Easter Bunny was my Grandmother.
Mags as your twin I cannot lie to you. Your drawings need a tad bit of work ? however your informative part of the thread was hilarious mutated bunny poop. And I just ate some Easter candy
These are the many questions I would ask as a child, and then get punished in school for asking the teachers :?
Bruhh Santa is evil!!! How you ask? His red clothes! They are stained with the blood of his victims! and he carries a large sack - big enough for a person to fit inside.