Jenni's POV I woke up in my warm yet thick blankets.I lay my feet on the ground and stand up to stretch.I look at my iPhone to see I missed five calls.There was no service but my phone still works.I say in a warehouse with four more people.First it's Danny and he's my crush.Then it's Franklin.Then my brother Peter and lastly Tiffany.Me and Franklin are very good friends. Suddenly my red light in my room goes blinking that tell me enimies are near!I grab my BeBe Gun and run out.I hide behind this broke down car.I see those weird marshons arrive.One shot and I hit on then all of they all start to look around and split up."OH SHIT!"I thought. Danny's POV I can see Jenny out my window.She doesn't know how much I love her.I need to help her so I get out my sniper and run out the back door.I climb the back if the warehouse and begin shooting.Jenny looks up and sees me.she had to take an double take to make sure u wasn't one of them stupid ass minions.Her jet black hair swayed an little when a wind came in.Still she wore her jammies. The war stopped and we went in.Jenny Looked at me and said she had something to tell me. Jenny's POV "Danny I have to tell you that I love u"I said smiling.He caressed my cheek and said he loved me back too.Then we kissed passionately.He carries me to his room.I felt it was too early but I knew what he wanted.So I did what he wanted.I climb on top of him as he unzipped his pants.His penus came out and I just was amazed.I sat on top and I could feel his thing going in my bum it felt weird and good.We fell asleep on eachother. Tiffany's POV I walked into my boyfriend Danny's room to see my best friend.Tears trickled down my cheek."You bitch!"I screamed angrily.Danny woke up in shock."Tiffany it's not what it looks like!"Danny says try to apologize."And u Lil mis I can fuck Danny, I thought you were my friend!My Best friend!"Screamed Tiffany."Tiffany I didn't know!"Said Jenny but by then I stormed out slammed their door.I slid against the wall and cried out tears.Peter came out of his room and wrapped his cold hands around me."you okay?"he asked."Yes"I replied.
Uhm.. Kinda immature, how old are you?? Lol. What are these minion/creature/whateveryoucalledthem things...
I wasn't criticizing I was sharing my opinion? And it's a fricken open forum, I can say whatever the hell I want to. I'm sure the she (the author) enjoys getting feedback.
Wtf? You said: I don't think you should criticize stories people havnt asked you to. So who the hell were you talking to? Because I'm pretty sure I'm the only damn one who replied to this besides you.