I'm Leaving

That's right. I don't if I'll come back, and if I do I don't know when. This isn't because of the whole silence thing. I am being farmed by Devil's Lair because I lied about my second account. I may still play on TheVillageIdiot, I don't know. What I'd like to do is reset so that I could start new, but both of my accounts have been disabled from resetting. If you can tell me how this can be undone please do. Anyway, I'd like to tell all of you a little bit about me. This could be pretty long, but please read it all.

I am a 14 year old boy. I am in the 9th grade and frankly I am a bit of a nerd. I am in honors English and advanced advanced math (yes, I meant to write advanced twice). I am the shy kid; I do bot have many friends. I am on the freshman soccer team, but a lot of my teammates do not accept me.

I first fell in love in the seventh grade. She was a new girl, and she was beautiful. One day I finally got the guts to ask her out. I got denied. From that point on I have not ask anyone out. I am in love right now actually, and yes it is love. You know that feeling you get in the pit of your stomach when you think about the one you love? I get that all the time. She was my friend last year, but this year she is not in any of my classes. I see her sometimes, but I am too afraid to talk to her.

I have problems with my family too. My parents are really nice, but they can also be very mean. They are the type of adults who do not like all of the new technology and things like that. The things that hurts me the most is whenever my mother calls me lazy. She does not think that this has an affect on me, but it does. I will sometimes just go up to my room and cry, I'm not afraid to admit it. I have also had suicidal thoughts. I think about the most painless way of doing it. If I were not such a coward I would have defiantly gone through with it by now. Sometimes I think that the world would just be better without me, no one would miss me much.

That feeling of love you feel in the pit of your stomach; I also get it when I experience other emotions extremely. I am feeling it right now as I write, it is being caused by sadness.

My grandfather died at the age of seventy of a heart attack when I was about five. I remember that I would go somewhere I could be alone and cry while I thought about him. My other grandfather and my grandmother have recently died over the past year and a half, maybe two. I remember how my grandmother was always bringing my siblings and I gifts. She was a great woman. She got cancer in her seventies and survived it. My mother said that we kept her going, we being her grandchildren.

I have many plans for my life, though thy may better be described as dreams. What I want most is to be a rapper or singer. I don't know if I am any good, I only sing and rap in the shower or when no one is around. I'm afraid that if I tell anyone my dreams will be crushed. What I want is to become rich. I want people to know who I am for once, I want my name to be remembered. I want to be able to buy my parents a big house in Italy, which is our nationality, where they can live the rest of they're life happily. I dread the fact that this will probably never happen. Most likely I will continue my life the way it is now; sad and utterly normal. My existence will have no affect on the world, I will not matter.

Thank you for taking the time to read this, I may stay on this thread for a little while before I leave.

CampusClown

 

Thank you very much. If it is possible I ask you to please keep this thread alive, I would like as many people to read my story as possible.

 

This was no such thing MAC, and you are a very sad and small minded man if that is how you saw it. This is my life, and it felt good to finally tell someone about it.

 

Would you like me to tell their names so that you could look up their obituaries? I would gladly do so.

 

Here are their names Striker. Richard Rossio, Rochester Michigan. Don and Donna Melesky, Berkley Michigan.