Welcome, PIMD friends! •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• While browsing the lovely PIMD forums, I stumbled upon a posting that made me giggle. However, I later realized, there is no such thing as a stupid question. I will do my best to help everyone else out too. ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• The Question: Qualifications: Having recently graduated from the University of PIMD, I have acquired an Honors degree in Parting. I drink wine daily, and enjoy curling up in bed at 4am after a vigorous projectile of alcohol. My karaoke is not only done in the shower, but on top of beds, roof tops, chandlers and at Subway . The Response: 1) First and foremost, it is important to pick a suitable dorm room where you will want to party in [and drink, and drink, and drink]. [Lol, look farmiliar? Lies! You're drunk!] Look for a room that suits your taste. Like anime? No one cares. What about art and drawings? Artists are often found huddled around a window. All the dorms in PIMDU come with a window, so good luck. Or wait, how about music? Everyone likes music. Listen for band members practicing and follow their calling. Whatever dorm room you choose to party in, make sure you like its theme. It's hard making it back to another dorm after 2 beers [yes, you read that correctly you light weight, you!] or party in your own, but cleaning up is never fun. And that's domestic. 2) Bring your craziest friend with you! But not the sobbing, "OMG I'm sew drunk, lets talk about my feelings type of crazy friend with you. Cause that's a bad time and ain't nobody got time for that. But also, make sure that friend will compliment you in the morning. [lightseagreen]3) Thirdly, BYOA. Yes, Bring Your Own Alcohol. There's nothing more horrible than trying to steal beer out of someone else fridge only to realize all that hard work was for nothing. [/color] [Crap, picked the vodka. Hate it. Better chug before anyone sees me and kicks me out! It's almost down... C'mon! I can do it!] 4) Have a safe word with your friend. This is important when you've reached your limit and can't down anymore. Feeling like you can touch the stars? [theres no stars in the dorm room!] or how about seeing elephants? [hey, some people may have turned their dorm into a barn house - who am I to judge?]. BUT! IT. IS. OK. TO. SAY. I'LL CRUSH YOUR WALNUTS! Cause you know, that's much more cooler than saying "NO MORE PLZ" to more alcohol. 5) Go back to your OWN dorm room after dancing on that doormates desk, bed, floor and bathroom vanity to avoid waking up naked, with your head in the toilet, or substituting as the shower curtain. Even if you have to crawl back! DO. IT. [I can see my dorm, no I can't, that's okay, I can't give up. Hey is that a snickers bar?] Most importantly, find your bed. Lay on your side to avoid dying from early morning puke that you can't change positions from, and CHUG an entire water bottle, or the whole case to avoid dehydration and old grandma skin in the morning.