Help!!!

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by kayla1031, Sep 10, 2011.

  1. I have to write a complete story in exactly forty lines (will be seen by thousands of people), any ideas?
     
  2. Copy one of Chloe's story

    Jk
     
  3. I wouldn't steal from a fellow writer no matter how amazing their stories are
     
  4. Do you have to write forty lines EXACTLY?
     
  5. Yes, how am I going to do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  6. Do you think this is okay?
    -------
    Contest story

    1. I watched with wary eyes as my closest friends turn into complete strangers.
    2. All those years i thought they had been on my side, all those years of deception.
    3. I wish that I could go back in time, go back to when we were all a team.
    4. Thoughts of that kind are for children, though.
    5. After everything that had led up to this, I learned that frivolous thoughts are a waste of precious time.
    6. The only thing I can do now is wait for a chance to escape.
    7. Slowly, the traitors funnel out through a small hatch.
    8. Waiting until the sound of their footsteps were far enough away, I slide out from under the floorboards and dash to the window.
    9. The drop is terrifying, but I know that it is all an illusion.
    10. Even the soft thump of my feet landing is enough to startle a cluster of nearby birds.
    11. Quietly sprinting away from the noise, I notice that no one's car is in the driveway.
    12. That is a strangely normal, yet peculiar occurrence.
    13. I now have to focus on getting back home, the only safe place in existence.
    14. Suddenly, I stop.
    15. Am I going in circles?
    16. All of the trees seem the same to me, or are they the same.
    17. The building I recently escaped is already out of sight.
    18. Have I really gone that far?
    19. My questions are answered when I hear a multiple cars passing by on a highway, completely oblivious to my situation.
    20. Waving my arms like a maniac, I eventually flag down a car willing to let me hitchhike.
    21. The interior of the car smells as if many carsick children had ridden in it, yet I manage to take a nap.
    22. When I wake up, I am in an extremely familiar town with (hopefully) little to no danger left in it.
    23. Once I dig my house key out of my pocket, I open the front door to an semi-abandoned looking living room.
    24. I check the pantry, cupboards, and even the powerless fridge for something edible.
    25. Of course, nothing is to be found.
    26. After taking my second nap of the day, I decide to check out my old bedroom.
    27. Except for the completely demolished window, my room looks similar to the way I left it years ago.
    28. Humorless laughter takes over me then, the dull sound just made me feel worse.
    29. How I wish I had never met that infernal spy!
    30. Because of him, my life was falling apart.
    31. I suppose I deserved it, though.
    32. Before my life turned upside down, I was hopelessly spoiled.
    33. But death...it has a way of changing you.
    34. As does life, I suppose.
    35. Life, in general, is a roller coaster.
    36. Right now, though, I could not see the hill...yet.
    37. "Psst! Leah," I heard someone whisper.
    38. I turned around and saw my younger sister, Wendy (who I had begun to think was dead), poking her head out of my closet.
    39. "Wendy!" I screamed in joy.
    40. I guess the hill was closer than I had thought.
     
  7. It's perfect. 


    And lmao. I don't mind if you take one of my oneshots or stories, they're all fails anyways. 
     
  8. On line sixteen,


    "All these trees seem the same to me, or are they the same."

    Turn that into:

    "All these trees seem the same to me... Or all they really all the same?"


     I'll help you with your story! It's so good!
     
  9. Chloe they are NOT fails!
     
  10. 19. Remove the a before, "multiple cars".

    21. *managed.

    23. *a, not sure, but just to keep ot safe. It makes a bit more sense, but you can ignore this suggestion. 



    Ok.  I HOPE YOU WIN!!!
     
  11. Yeah win the contest!


    Go Girlie!
     
  12.  Yes they are! The endings look dumb after a while of brainstorming. I need to find a full-proof story. But my puny brain does not help with the thinking. 
     
  13. I'll help with the ending
     
  14.  thank you aki!
     
  15. Thanks for the tip, and your stories couldn't ever suck!
     
  16. ^_^


    You're welcome Kayla, GOD BLESS~!
     
  17. Here's the revised version
    -------
    Contest story

    1. I watched with wary eyes as my closest friends turn into complete strangers.
    2. All those years i thought they had been on my side, all those years of deception.
    3. I wish that I could go back in time, go back to when we were all a team.
    4. Thoughts of that kind are for children, though.
    5. After everything that had led up to this, I learned that frivolous thoughts are a waste of precious time.
    6. The only thing I can do now is wait for a chance to escape.
    7. Slowly, the traitors funnel out through a small hatch.
    8. Waiting until the sound of their footsteps were far enough away, I slide out from under the floorboards and dash to the window.
    9. The drop is terrifying, but I know that it is all an illusion.
    10. Even the soft thump of my feet landing is enough to startle a cluster of nearby birds.
    11. Quietly sprinting away from the noise, I notice that no one's car is in the driveway.
    12. That is a strangely normal, yet peculiar occurrence.
    13. I now have to focus on getting back home, the only safe place in existence.
    14. Suddenly, I stop.
    15. Am I going in circles?
    16. All of the trees seem the same to me...or are they the same.
    17. The building I recently escaped is already out of sight.
    18. Have I really gone that far?
    19. My questions are answered when I hear multiple cars passing by on a highway, completely oblivious to my situation.
    20. Waving my arms like a maniac, I eventually flag down a car willing to let me hitchhike.
    21. The interior of the car smells as if many carsick children had ridden in it, yet I managed to take a nap.
    22. When I wake up, I am in an extremely familiar town with (hopefully) little to no danger left in it.
    23. Once I dig my house key out of my pocket, I open the front door to a semi-abandoned looking living room.
    24. I check the pantry, cupboards, and even the powerless fridge for something edible.
    25. Of course, nothing is to be found.
    26. After taking my second nap of the day, I decide to check out my old bedroom.
    27. Except for the completely demolished window, my room looks similar to the way I left it years ago.
    28. Humorless laughter takes over me then, the dull sound just made me feel worse.
    29. How I wish I had never met that infernal spy!
    30. Because of him, my life was falling apart.
    31. I suppose I deserved it, though.
    32. Before my life turned upside down, I was hopelessly spoiled.
    33. But death...it has a way of changing you.
    34. As does life, I suppose.
    35. Life, in general, is a roller coaster.
    36. Right now, though, I could not see the hill...yet.
    37. "Psst! Leah," I heard someone whisper.
    38. I turned around and saw my younger sister, Wendy (who I had begun to think was dead), poking her head out of my closet.
    39. "Wendy!" I screamed in joy.
    40. I guess the hill was closer than I had thought.
     
  18. 16. ...or are they?


    Cut out the last part. :3
     
  19. Okay, thanks!