It's been a whole year since I found out Im a demon. I'm 17 and I'm still scared. "BRING! BRING! BRING!" my alarm clock wakes me up at 5 A.m. I sigh and get put of bed. I walk into the bathroom and stare at my reflection. I stare at my reflection at it sends a shiver down my spine. Before I found out I was fine now I can't even look at myself. I will update that's all for now
I like the idea,but just a few Improvements: •Use paragraphs. •Make it longer. •Use a new line for your dialogue. •Use more detail.Maybe, try closing your eyes and reading what you've put to describe a room/person/thing.See if you can picture it in your mind clearly. •Don't use capital letters to show certain types of words.(As in 'BRING!') Use what punctuatiom would work to do that effect instead. •Proof read, a few spelling mistakes.
Update: "Emi!" I hear mom yell from downstairs. "coming!" I yell back. I run down the stairs. "there's a package for you" mom says. I walk to the table where the package is laying. On the stamp it says Carolina State Demon Council. I open the box and a Glowing Green orb floats out. I reach my hand out to touch the magic orb and it floats away from me. I follow it outside. It stops in the woods among the trees.