Chuck Norris Jokes

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by *Hunter467442 (01), Oct 19, 2011.

  1. Post ur favorite and best chuck Norris jokes


    I'll start......



    Keep then ToU apropriate




    Ok...


    Jesus can walk on water. Chuck Norris can swim through land.
     
  2. Chuck Norris is so cool he didnt like this thread

    Cyborg!! <(=_•)> rawr yeabuddy1
     
  3. Chuck Norris slams revolving doors, chuck norris once peed on a tractor, it is 2day known as optimus prime
     
  4. Chuck Norris can play Russian Roulette with a knife.

    Chuck Norris doesn't swim. He beats the shit outta the water till it takes him where he wishes to go.

    Chuck Norris can drown a fish.

    Chuck Norris was once bitten by a rattlesnake. After five days of excruciating pain, the rattlesnake died.
     
  5. If chuck Norris gets stabbed the knife bleeds
     
  6. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door
     
  7. Once chuck Norris got pull over












    The officer was lucky to get away with a warning
     
  8. God said let there be light. Chuck Norris said say please
     
  9. You dont find chuck norris he finds yoy
     
  10. At the battle of Gettysburg chuck Norris was referee
     
  11. Jesus was gods son god was chuck mortised son
     
  12. Off topic:

    If Mario fought goombas with his fists the game would me over in seconds

    And that is why he jumps on them
     
  13. Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.

    Chuck Norris's tears can heal blindness, too bad he never cries.

    Chuck Norris can heal by touch. One Time a blind man touched chuck norris. Unfourtanely the first and last thing he saw was a fatal roundhouse kick.

    Chuck Norris can hit 2 birds with 1 stone.
     
  14. They once made chuck norris toilet paper. But they had to recall it because he didnt take shit from anyone
     
  15. Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did...
     
  16. Chick Norris doesn't have a dad he just is
     
  17. Once asked what his favorite song was he kicked the man repeatedly in the face until he was crying for mercy. "that's my favorite song "he replied