Chair Appreciation Thread

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Danzo, Jul 20, 2012.

  1. LOP, hello there, this thread came to mind when I was sitting on a chair and thought to myself, "Chairs are ****ing boss and they deserve a thread on PIMD." So I resolved to write a thread about chairs. Then, while speaking with Jada, she said yes to thread in Dolan speak.

    SO YOU'RE LUCKY MOTHER****ERS TODAY, YOU GET A THREAD ABOUT CHAIRS IN DOLAN SPEAK. GOOD LUCK READING THIS SHIT. (This shall be made like an extreme advertisement.)

    Tihs is Dolan spek.




    *****es, lets behld teh beuty of teh cher. I m goin to tlk abut 4 chers. Tihs is a regler cher.


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    Woh, BACK THE FUN BUS THE FUCK UP. Tihs cher is bttr thn 4 mijets hving secks in a sndbocks. Nao, whts spshul abut taht cher? It's portbel as ****. Put it dwn smwhre nd ****ing sun in ur fce? Wel, gues teh **** wht, u cn pik up tihs ****, fld it teh fuck in hlf, nd put it smwhre els witout hving to wrry abut brakng ur srry bck. Tihs shit is mde out of stel. Ur fat*** dosent hve wrry abut brakng anymre titty-likcng chers. Sumwon bout to fall on ther ass? Bettr ruhs tihs cher ovr and save ther donut-****ing sefl.

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    U see taht? Chers r so baws, tehy becum ur new suitcse. Late fr werk lazy mothr****er? Nt wiht tihs cher!

    Goddem, I m geting so hi off tihs. I mst tlk abut teh nxt cher befre my midn explds frm too muhc ****ing win.




    NAO, tihs is teh rokcing cher.


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    HOLD THE ****ING PHONE, IS THAT A SEESAW CHAIR

    Ys, duchebgs tihs is teh c-saw cher. Tehse r teh grapas of all chers. Oh mah gawd, whre to strt. Frst let's tke luk at tht cwality wud. Taht would wnt hve any splntrs in its awsme ****ing sefl. Got 99 prblms but a splntr aynt won. Alrite, lemme tel u bout tihs shit. U cn rock teh fuck frward, u cn rock teh fuck bckward. Is nywhore judgin u? Fuck no. Old ppl sit on dese hre shiznuggets nd thyre wise as fuck. Holy ****weeds, dnt u wnt to jst creem ur ***cheeks al ovr tihs *****?

    Tehse cn cum in dffrnt modls too, holy ****stick.

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    Luk at taht, holy ****cheese lrod spre mai testickels. I jst wana mlt tht peece of metul gudness nd jmp in teh mlted mess, holy fuck.




    Neckst is teh ****ing mery-go-rund cher.


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    HOLY HOT DICKS FROM HELL IS THAT A SWIVEL CHAIR? FUCK

    Sweet bby jeezus, I dnt knwo wht to sai. Teh mery-go-rund cher is too beest fr regler bckgrund, ****ing reinbw bckgrund mst be aplyd. Cher so baws, niggers wnna sit on meh. Let's tke a gud hrd luk at teh beooty of tihs cher. U cn rayse it teh fuck up, u cn lwer it teh fuck dwn. Board at werk faggot? Wel if ur a smrt nigger u'll hve won of tehse ****ers to spin teh fuck arund in. Sum faggot trys to trll u nd snek up behnd u leik a failninja? NOT TO-****ING-DAY. U spin ur ****ing cher arund nd ctch teh failninja. Nd u no al majer stroes crry tehse bomb ass ****wads. Fuck ur mom, dus she hve whels? Fuck no. Tehse ****ers hve whels. Got a grul? Gve hr a reid in teh Spinny-Cher 5-****ing-Thusund. 35 meils per push faggot. Jesus ****ing chrised, tihs wil fuck ur shit up.

    LUK AT TIHS OBSE SPINNY CHER

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    Teh descripshun sed 201 359999. Do I no wht teh fuck it ment? No. Bhut I dnt gve won flyng fuck. HOLY MOTHER****ING GAWD ON A ****ING PEDOSTUL, MERY-GO-RUND CHERS.




    If u hvnet jizzed ur pents yet tehn u bttr gt teh Klenecks bocks redy neckst to u. LST ****ING CHER, FAGGOTS, LEGGO PROBE CHERS.


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    YEA YOU BETTER RUB THOSE ****ING EYES AGAIN, IT'S A GODDAMN PROBE CHAIR. * Retarded girl not included. *

    Tehse slikc fahter****ers knwo ther shit. Tehy knwo hw to mke u feyul leik teh aftrglw frm secks. Dam it tkes teh ****ing enrgy frm ur house nd mkes bals mve all up on ur bak. U knwo Brook**** hs tihs in its store. Feyuling tierd as fuck? Hop on tihs nigger nd let it probe teh fuck out of u. Mke u rejuvenated as fuck, holy donutaids. Thers a whle ****ing reemote fr eech of tehse bastards. Ur brayn cnt evn begn to cumprehind tihs nd neithr cn I. Shit, THER R ARMRESTS JESUS CHRISED. FUCK, THER R SEPRATE CHERS FR UR LEGZ GODDEM. I wuld trayd n an aidsburger fr tihs glden creeashun. Can't affrod tihs *****? Dam Tyrone y u so pore, gt ur shit togthr man. Availble in Balldropping Blu, God Gold, Rape Red, ****astic Sapphire nd mny more ***fistng coulours. Hw did tihs wrld get tihs cher? Thomas Edison ****ing made it, nosy ****ing whore. Fuck ur vibrator, tihs wil get teh job dun goddem.

    TEHSE CHERS MDE ME CUM HRDER THN ALL SEASONS OF STR ****ING WARS. GT URSEFL TEHSE SEXY CHERS.

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    Sitting on a chair the entire time writing this.

    I might get silenced for this :$ Doesn't matter I had a helluva lot of fun writing this xD Wasn't meant to be funny but I made me laugh. I feel like making more extreme advertisements. * I meant no offense to anyone if anyone gets offended or something *
     
  2. LMFAO LMFAO LMFAO

    LOLOLOLOL
     
  3. Matt, wrong thread?
     
  4. I don't know that I've ever seen more asterisks 
     
  5. And I've been silenced :$
     
  6. ._. I like the midgets in a sandbox.
     
  7. I saw you get silenced 
     
  8. No not wrong thread. I agree that chairs are soooooo powerful. It's like millions and even billions of wooden Herobrines and Chuck Norris.
     
  9. I got silenced, like a boss.
     
  10. Thanks Kandy 
     
  11. Teh awosme trhead.

    I understood everything 
     
  12. It sucks how you can't preview gifs tho xD or I wouldn't have posted it.
     
  13. Oh my god Dan
     
  14. It gets better
     
  15. Danzo you're insane bro 
     
  16. Manny  I think imma make more extreme advertisement/Dolan spek threads
     
  17. I'm srory yuo're slineced bro!!