Lies

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by *X-Fawn-X (01), Oct 30, 2011.

  1. Lies


    "Emily I Love You"Charlie Said
    "I Love You To"I Said
    At First It Was True But Than
    It Was An Lie

    Well To Start Off Am Star
    My Profile>Sweet,Popular,Drama Queen,And Cool
    I've Got An Awesome Bf Named Charlie(Or He Was)


    Now On With The Story
    I Woke Up And Stretched,
    I Was So Tired!
    I Got Up And Got Changed,
    Than Walked Out The Front Door
    I Was On My Way Walking To School,



    I Felt An Hand On My Shoulder ....
    "Boo!" There's My 2 BestFriends
    Sydney And Merrill Behind Me
    "Ekk Don't Scare Me" I Shriek
    But Am Cracking Up



    We Walk In The Front Door
    EveryBody Stares I Smile And Wave
    There I See Him,The Hottest Boy In School,Charlie
    I Giv Him And Hug




    "Hey SweetHeart"He Says Rudely
    "Hey Charlie? Whats Wrong?"
    Suddenly SomeBody Pushes Me
    I Turn Around Theres Rose Pretty But Mean,Friendless To



    Rose Says Sharply"Why Are U Hugging My Bf??
    "What!!? i Scream,


    Haha,So My Grammer MIGHT Be Messed Up,Hope Its Not,Should I Continue?
     
  2. Yays Its Not Messed Up
     
  3. Kinda Boreing Btw Sorry But Will Get Better If People Want Me To continueb
     
  4. I can't read it. Look. This is how a story should look.

    I walk silently through the woods. Following the short girl with the ribbons in her hair and blood dripping down her neck. Yes, I'm stalking a ghost.

    See how there's periods where they need to be. And commas. And most importantly CAPITALS only when needed?

    I'm not trying to be rude. I'm trying to help you out before the trolls get here
     
  5. It's fine. I'm just trying to help. And most stories don't use >...
     
  6. Blahh I'm Not Writing Stories Any More
     
  7. I read some of it and it's good. But if you wanna quit thats your choice
     
  8. I Might And Might Not,

    I'll Wait For Some Others To Say What They Think.

    Oh,Btw My IPad Caps My Words Automatically.
     
  9. That's possible? And I'm sure there's a way to take it off
     
  10. Well It Is On My IPad

    I'll Try To Find An Way

    Btw Nice Story
     
  11. Go to Settings>General>Keyboard and there are options to turn them off. Secondly, the capital letters are one of the many grammar mistakes. I'm sorry, but I barely understood what you were trying to say. Also, use periods instead of commas and entering. Don't be sorry :) Just fix it.
     
  12. I liked the story and I could care less about the grammar cause mine sucks lol
     
  13. Your welcome
     
  14. DIFFRENT STORY 
    Is This Ok Grammar btw not same story different.

    I woke up and stretched. I smelled
    Hospital on me.I've been in the hospital For an few weeks now cause I've got lung cancer.

    I didn't know how it happened,It just Did One morning I woke up with an terrible pain inside me.
    Next thing I know I'm at the hospital

    Today I got great news from Dr.John
    I was getting out!I could finally gonna see my friends.

    4 Days Later(At school)
    I walk through the front door of my school. Cry's of joy shout out "Emily"
    Running to give me hugs our my 2 best friends Merrill,Sydney,And my Bf Charlie

    Is That Ok Grammar?
     
  15. Nvm Forget That