don't leave

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by *Takon (01), Sep 30, 2011.

  1. Srry I'm not very good at grammar I really suck at it :(
     
  2. Keep going it's really good
     
  3. Keep going!!! 
     
  4. Kissing her drake felt on top of the world like no one could bring him down he softly pulled away and looked into her beautiful golden brown eyes he felt safe and comforted
    D: Carly please don't ever leave me I cant live with out you
    Carly turned a shade of red her golden brown eyes filled with tears of joy knowing he just said everything she needed to hear
    C: I won't leave I...
    Bang the front door was slammed open and an evil laugh rang through the house
    E: come out come out I don't bite
    The evil came dressed in blood red cloths and a black devils mask already covered in previous kills he searched the house looking for his next victim
     
  5. I need a male part to play drakes best friend anytakers it needs to have a bio and personality and all that stuff
     
  6. Does anyone read this any more?
     
  7. Thx I hope it's good
     
  8. I read it! Update please
     
  9. Keep goingggggg 
     
  10. Drake got worried and pulled out his ankle revolver and pointed it at the door-
    D: if he comes through that door I'll kill him my self
    -Carly looked at him in shock love and worriedness -
    C: Drake what if we die what will you do?
    -drake pulled out his phone and handed it to Carly-
    D: Call Dylan and tell him we are in trouble and tell him to call the cops...
     
  11. Bump bump bump!! 
     
  12. I'm sorry but the grammar issue in this strory is unbearable. If your grammar was fixed, it would at least be a decent story, but I can barely understand the story line.