So, the holidays are real hard for me since my grandma passed. Christmas was hers. She loved it. Even after 4 years of her passing, Christmas is hard and rough for me to celebrate. Probably with her and asking with my dad, I never got to say goodbye to them. In a way, I guess what I wrote is my goodbyes to them. The days drag on slowly for me As I think back to the days of you I wish you were here and could just see Things are just not the same without you I know I need to move on with my life But every little thing remind me of you The family has fractured... Changed At times it's like they don't even think of you I'm sorry for being selfish and wanting you here There was one person who kept us together... You I'm sorry I'm not as strong as everyone else I've heard songs that break my and remind me of you When will this pain end? When can I move on? I miss you I just want you to know how far I've come I want my successes to be in honor of you You believed in me and my goals I don't want to let go but this has to be my goodbyes to you So, my question is how do you celebrate the ones you've lost? How did you say your goodbyes? I'm just curious because I couldn't say goodbye to my dad or my grandma. I just got tattoos in honor of them. I guess a way for me to feel close to them. I suppose I'm afraid that letting go, is letting go of them.
I’m sry for your loss. I don’t know really. I was young enough when I lost all my grandparents and I wasn’t as close to them so I got over them. I guess like an ex I really loved and cherished I would say they will always be in your heart and mind and never really go away. You can do stuff in their honour. Write poems dedicated to them or a book if you’re really ambitious. I like the tat idea.
That's kinda why I got the tattoo of my dad, it reminds me that's he's not suffering anymore and always in my heart. I'll try and get a picture posted.
My dad passed in an accident when I was 14, so I never had the chance to say goodbye either. Next summer it will be 10 years ago, but I’m not sure I’ve said goodbye either. Idk, when I was younger I had a lot of strange dreams where I somehow knew he was dead, but he was here on a visit, and because I felt like I got the chance to talk to him through those, it was easier to handle. In those I’ve told him what I’ve needed to say, asked him to come back, told him I want him to be happy, and he has told me he knows it’s hard but that he can’t come back. So I guess I somehow got closure. I don’t know if I’ll ever say ”goodbye” for real, but I will always be ready to say ”hello again”.
Sometimes I say tata or toodaloo or cya later or catch ya or goodbye or cya round or shalom or bye or cya later alligator or cya later suckaz or hasta la vista baby or good riddance or fùck off or get out of here or thanks for coming or until next we meet or I hope I never see you again or "why are you running?" or okay or thanks for having me or sometimes I'll switch it up on them and say hello or some other greeting or kewchow! or bada bing bada boom or omae wa mou shindeiru or getouttaaaheeeeeere or okay now fùck off back to where whence you came or I'll misd you or sometimes I'll just give th a hug and/or a kiss or a handshake or some other gesture like a bow or just run away and say nothing when they can't see me (it's sorta not awkward) or I'll wave or awkwardly smile at them There are lots of ways to say goodbye But most people never really say goodbye to someone before they pass. Some people give up beforehand... That can be sad because you're grieving while the person is still alive... But I know that most people feel like you do: like they didn't get to say goodbye properly... I think that you need to understand and come to terms with the pain. Force yourself to grieve and remember the good times you had together. I like to be grateful for the things the person did in life and reflect on the fragility and brevity of life... And just how we make the most of our mortal instrument... But while our songs may be short, they are still beautiful, and while they may no longer play aloud, they will still play in your head. Those beautiful melodies. I think it's good to try and make those melodies heal rather than harm... To remember the lessons those we love gave us... But sometimes it's impossible. My best advice is to honour their will, investments, wisdom, love, etc. They wouldn't want to be repaid for their actions in tears but in fortitude. In your strength and in your smiles.
I don’t really think there is a way to say goodbye, and then be like: ok that was it (even though I know that’s not what you mean). It happens slowly and you do it without really realizing it. Doesn’t mean you will miss them any less, just gets easier to live with.
I've heard that from several people. One of my friends told me that on the birthdays of those who passed, she goes to dinner to their favorite place and celebrate their lives.
I’m sorry for your loss. I know how you feel; I lost my grandpa on Christmas Eve night. To celebrate, I always fish (in the summer of course) because we would always go fishing. If your grandma or dad always did something with you, do that same thing. If you have kids pass it down. Make it a tradition of a sort ️