There were a few ducks in the park blowing bubbles, and a police officer gave them a ticket. They went to court and the first duck went in to see the judge. The judge asks, "What is ur name and why are you here?" The duck said, "My name is quack and I'm here for blowing bubbles in a park." The judge said, "That's not a crime, ur free to leave. please send the next duck in." So the next duck comes in and the judge asks, "What is ur name and why are you here?" The duck says "My name is quack quack and I'm here for blowing bubbles in the park." The judge replied, "That's not a crime ur free to go. Please send the next duck in." So the third duck comes in and the judge says, "Let me guess ur name is quack quack quack and ur here for blowing bubbles In the park?" The duck says "No, my name is bubbles." Boss: Where were you born? Santa: India .. Boss: which part? Santa: What 'which part'? Whole body was born in India . ***************************************************************** 2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car. Sardar 1: What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing. Sardar 2: Dont worry, I have one more. Four guys are at a high school reunion and one of them goes to the restroom. The other three guys start talking about how succesful their sons are. Guy 1: My son is so successful he owns a cardealership and just gave his best friend a Ferarri. Guy 2: Thats nothing, my son owns an airliner and just gave his best friend a private jet Guy 3: Well my son is more success than that, he owns an architecture firm and just gave his best friend a castle Guy 4 walks out of the bathroom and walks over to the other 3 guys Guy 4: Hey guys what are we talking about Guy 1: Oh, we are talking about how successful our sons are Guy 4:Well, my son is a Gay stripper Guy 2: You must be so dissappointed with what he's done with his life Guy 4: Actually, he is doing very well for himself. He just got a Ferrari, a jet, and a caste from his three boyfriends. *Shocked* At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh! Sardar: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying? A very touching story: A small boy named Hameed lived in a village in Morocco. None of his classmates liked him because of his stupidity, especially his teacher, who was always yelling at him "You are driving me crazy Hameed!!!!!" One day hameed's mother came into school to check on how he was doing. The teacher told his mother honestly, that her son is simply a disaster, getting very low marks and even she had never seen such a dumb boy in her entire teaching career!!!! The mother was shocked at the feedback and withdrew her son from the school & even moved to another town!!!!! 25 years later, the teacher was diagnosed with an incurable cardio disease! All the doctors strongly advised her to have an open heart operation, which only one surgeon could perform....... Left with no other options, the teacher decided to have the operation, which was successful...... When she opened her eyes after the surgery she saw a handsome doctor smiling down at her! She wanted to thank him, but could not talk. Her face started to turn blue, she raised her hand, trying to tell him something but eventually died! The doctor was shocked and was trying to work out what went wrong, when he turned around he saw our friend Hameed, working as a cleaner in the clinic, who had unplugged the oxygen equipment to connect his Mobile Charger !!!!! Don't tell me you thought that Hameed became a doctor???? ����
once upon a time a bird got a late start flying south for winter, as a result of the birds late start he was frozen in midflight. He fell out of the sky like a rock and landed in a near by field where cows were grazing. If things couldnt be worse as he lay there frozen a cow approached and started to **** on the bird. The bird wanted to cry out in disgust in till realizing the **** was thawing the bird from being frozen! As he was finally melted he screamed out in Joy! A close by cat heard the birds screams and quickly went to the bird and ate him. The moral of the story is : Not everyone that gets you in **** is a enemy Not everyone that gets you out of **** is a friend And if you find yourself in **** , keep quiet !
A man walking in New York’s Central Park sees a Rottweiler attacking a little girl. He subdues the dog and saves her life. A passing Fox News reporter says: “You’re a hero. Tonight’s TV news bulletin will say: ‘Brave New Yorker Saves Child.” The man replies: “I’m a tourist from Saudi Arabia.” That night the news on Fox TV says: “Islamic extremist kills New York dog.”