I'm pretty sure all you FF'ers are so annoyed at me for starting stories and quitting. I think I finally found the one story I'd be excited to continue. 1) This is a cliched romance story, okay. I'm fully aware the only thing that happens is "love". 2) This first update is EXTREMELY long, mostly because I needed to include background information and I'm always told I need to describe the background and such in better detail. The next one will be shorter, to save your thumbs . 3) I'm really slow at updating because I hardly have time to write except for rides to and from school, to and from practice, some nights and on the weekends. I hope you like . ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 1: MacKenzie Fosser I groan as I flip open the cover of my old, History textbook with a musty odor. "The Revolutionary War," I read aloud as I quickly look to the back of each section to see my assigned questions. Without reading the pages, I skim through the pages to look for the question answers and when I finished, I plop down onto my bed and put my earbuds into my ears. "Safe and Sound" by Taylor Swift and The Civil Wars, quickly block out all the background noise. I take my brand new, pink, glittery guitar and strums along to the song and sing. "You'll be alright, no one can hurt you now. Come morning light, you and I'll be safe and sound." That's me and my boyfriend's song. I love it so much ever since he showed it to me. -Flashback- "Now, now, Kenz, I know you hate any country sounding music, but I know you'll love this one," Drew tried putting the earbud into my ear, but I pull the earbud out of my ear and refuse. "Do I have to?" I pout making kissy lips. "Ohmygosh Mackenzie, you're so adorable when you do that," he says and plants a quick kiss on my cheek sending butterflies right into my stomach. "Hmph," I pout again and reposition myself on the picnic blanket. It's a beautiful, spring day, and Drew and I decided to spend it having a picnic lunch in the park. "Please? For me!" he begs and puts his pouty face on. "You're even more cute when you do that," I smile, "fine, only for you though." I put the earbud in and wait as he presses the play button on his iPod. I lay down on the on the blue and white, checkered blanket feeling the crinkled blades of grass I'm squishing under the blanket. I close my eyes and breathe the fresh, beautiful air. When the song ended, Drew asks, "Well? What do you think?" "Uhhhhhh," I manage to croak out. "Well?" he leans his head forward and smiles. "OKAY. OKAY. I like it. No, I love it," I smile feeling guilty. "I knew it! I so knew it! Gosh. Can this be our song? It's so special because I'll know I'll always protect you," he smiles colliding his hand with mine and sliding his fingers in between mine. "Yes!" I say as he lays down beside me restarting the song. "In that moment, I swear we were infinite." -Charlie from Perks of Being a Wallflower -End of Flashback- I smile remembering that special moment and get up off my bed to go to Drew's house. I need to see him, especially after reminiscing that moment. I take my History textbook with me so Drew and I could study for our History test tomorrow together. I grab my car keys so quickly they make a jingle sound from clashing with each other, "Mo-om. I'm going to Drew's." "Alright sweetie," she calls from her bedroom, "Be careful! Be back before 10, a storm is supposed to be coming." I walk out the front door and to my red, 2008 Mustang. I got her at a used car shop from all my summer job savings working as a lifeguard at the pool. My parents didn't approve of my car choice because apparently, red is the car color that gets pulled over the most. They also don't think my first car should be so fancy. I guess for car stealers and such. On my drive to Drew's house, I check the mirror at the stop lights and apply some lip gloss. I straighten out my plain orange v neck and brush any lint off my light blue jeans. I made a right turn on his street, Litening Avenue and found the fifth house from the right. A beautiful, stone, teo story house with a gray roof and a flowering garden. There is a large window next to door in full view of their living room. You can see the blue velvet curtains tied with a gold string at each side of the window. His mother is an artist and amazing at pottery. She custom made their house letters from tile and paint. Their house number, 1774, is plastered right next to their front door over the doorbell. Thunder began rumbling in the sky frantically and I hope to get home before the storm completely blows everything away. I knock on the door really lightly; I didn't want to wake Drew's adorable, little sister, Maribelle. She loves me dearly. When I'm waiting for Drew to finish basketball practice, we play dolls together and have tea parties. After waiting a while, I still get no answer. Hmmmmm, that's funny, I thought to myself, all the lights in the living room are on. Someone must be home. I walk to the large window, which happened to be open and widen my eyes. Words just pour into my brain as the thunder booms in the sky. Drew. Girl. Movie. Arms. Hands. I can't see what she looks like, since the room is so dark. Right through that very window... That grand, looking window, that, stupid, freaking window, is Drew... With his arms around another girl. ------------------------------------- I stay watching them a little while longer; I know it sounds creepy, but I didn't want to second guess him. Nothing. Five minutes later... Nothing. 10 minutes later... Nothing. 13 1/2 minutes later... Wait. Nope. Nothing. After 20 minutes, I finally decide to text him, you know, very casually, as if I'm not staring at him right through his window. Me: Hey babe. What are you up to right now? Drew: Can't talk, basketball practice. I see him respond, smirk at his phone, and continue watching the movie. Words are raging through my mind. JERK. LIAR. CHEATER. Why would he do this to me? After dating for a year and a half, this means nothing to him? I wait for another half hour and finally see the rolling credits of the movie. Drew switches off the TV and DVD player with his remote and turns on a lamp. He sits on the couch and the girl sits on his lap facing him. Her face is unfamiliar; I have no clue where he could have possibly met her. I've never seen her around school or anywhere for that matter. She has glossy, raven hair, that reaches her waist and long, slender legs that look amazing in her high-waisted shorts and her tribal-printed bandeau top. She wraps her arms around his neck and they bump noses, smiling at each other. Ugh. This is supposed to be me! Not her! I see their lips move closer and closer until they finally touch, and, of course, they keep going. So how do I feel about this? My boyfriend being a cheater? While they're shoving their faces closer together, I'm here bawling my eyes out. Yeah. No big deal. No. It's a HUGE deal. I run down the porch and cry. I cry and kick my car wheel until it hurts my foot. I cry and drive 75 miles per hour on the highway. I cry as a police officer gives me a speeding ticket. I cry and cry and cry. I cry and I feel my heart shattering into tinier pieces by the second. ------------------------------------- I turn the radio on and hear the news report about the storm saying that people should keep off the roads. I didn't want to go home though. Not just yet. I didn't want my mom to see me like this. She'd say "I told you so" about how high school boys are horrible to date. I drive back a little on the highway to my hometown Connecticut. Wow, I drove all the way to Massachusetts, I thought to myself as I pass the "Welcome to Massachusetts!" sign. I skipped dinner, so I'm really hungry. I drive off the highway off a random exit and drive around. Nothing. All I see are a couple historical museums and a ton of houses. What a dead area.. I thought. I drive around even more still teary-eyed and my eyes puffed up. After a long time, I realize I'm lost; I'm stranded in a random town in Massachusetts. I take out my phone and use Google Maps to see any possible way of getting home. I get my way out of the random streets I turned at and drive myself back on the highway. The rain starts pouring hearing the thud of the water hit my car as I drive. I almost thought the rain would break the glass of my car. The heavy rain made driving extremely difficult and along with my ready eyes, my driving is even worse. I feel as if I'm the only car on the highway, and I probably am considering this terrible storm. ------------------------------------- My car begins slowing down and the "no gas" button begins flashing. "NO NO NO! Come on, baby! Take me home," I cry even harder. This day just did not go as I wanted it. I take my phone from my purse and try to call my mom. No answer. I take my phone and bang it against the car window and hitting my head against the wheel. I don't realize I hit the window so hard, the glass breaks, rain soaking up the entire inside of my car. I threw my phone outside onto the road. I open up the door to see a gigantic puddle with my phone right in the center. Great. No boyfriend. No gas. No phone. Could my day get any worse? I open the car door again and step outside. My shirt clings to my body, soaked from the rain and my hair drenched from the downpour. My jeans feel heavy making me not even want to wear them anymore. I get outside, look to the bare land on the side of the highway and scream. At 2:30 AM, I'm sitting in the back of my car shivering. I take the sun screen from my trunk and put it over my open window to prevent more rain getting in my car. I shiver and cry about what has happened in the past couple hours. I curl up into a ball and I close my eyes thinking it is just a dream. I open up my eyes suddenly to a crash of unusual lightning. By unusual I mean CRAZY WEIRD. I have NEVER seen lightning that color before. ZZZZZZZ. I see it again! The lightning is... Rainbow. ------------------------------------- I stay in my car admiring the constant flashes of rainbow lightning. How could this be? Rainbows form when the rain and sun are out at the same time. This is crazy! The lightning isn't even normal! It's a continuous flash, one after the other. I get out of the car into the pouring rain to get an even better look at the unusual weather. "One heck of a storm alright," I mutter as I walk closer and closer to the place where the lightning is striking. I stand and admire the beautiful rainbow flashes that shine in the dark, night sky. Breathtaking, I thought to myself. Grrrrrrrr. Oh gosh... Grrrrrrr. I look behind me quickly and see a small bear growling its teeth at me. I am heartbroken, sad, confused, but NOT FOOD! The bear walks closer to me the drool coming out of its mouth. Dear lord. I run away deeper into the field as the lightning continues to flash. I stop and turn to face the bear. The bear is still walking slowly toward me with very step. I try to make scary faces as the bear walks closer and closer and finally, the bear's eyes fill with fear and runs away. I laugh to myself thinking about the stupid bear and gave myself a pat on the back for scaring it away. I didn't realize I have even bigger problems to worry about. In that instant, the rainbow lightning strikes me, but I don't have the feeling of electrocution. It's more of a feeling of adrenaline. I watch myself get pulled from the ground and into the sky. I feel the rush of air wisp past me as i soar higher and higher as everything slowly becomes white. ------------------------------------- I wake up the next morning in a bed with a blanket over me. Thank goodness! It was only a dream! I feel my eyes close again and fell asleep again. I woke up with the sun shining into my eyes from the window over my bed. Wait... This isn't my house... I get up and walk around the room looking at it. Absolutely no TV or electricity! Ugh. Where the hell am I? I sat at the edge of the bed until the sun began to set. I'm starving and heartbroken and I have no clue here I am. I couldn't do much now, except to sleep. I lay back on the old bed and I close my eyes. ------------------------------------- I wake up again to the sun shining through my eyelids and keep my eyes closed to not be blinded from the sun. My eyelids appear a bright orange from the sun shining through them. It even blinded me a little from staring into the sun. I twist around a little moaning and lay on my side, my back to the window. I slowly open my eyes and see a boy I don't recognize, his nose inches from mine. His light blue eyes widen as mine widen. "Hello!" he says enthusiastically with a British accent. I scream.
Nice. Make sure that you're consistent with the tense of your verbs and the form. Certain things like "strum" and "strums" makes a difference as well as "finish" and "finished".