Hello Forumers, (I had started this thread but finger slipped and i hit cancel, cba to do bb coding again.) Moving Along. Before we start, i know that this thread might be long. It's not for you. It's for my sanity. I know you don't wanna hear about my problems. Its a game. Blah blah blah yada yada, whatever. Judge me or don't comment or don't just need to talk. So why not do it to stranger's I'll never meet. Sometimes when i get alone i find myself slipping into a depressive state, (most of the reason I started playing PIMD, coincidentally it's also most of the reason I started smoking.) and i start to blame myself for things that i normally wouldn't (won't go into detail) , or thinking too hard into my shortcomings.(this sounds like a normal thing but i've noticed it happens a lot, but i've convinced myself it's because i'm alone often and i don't need professional help.) It gets so bad to the point that i consider self-harm at times, why am i telling you this? You don't care and probably have stopped reading by now so it's for my security alone. And peace of mind . The only thing that stops me most of the time is i can't stomach the thought of gashes and or cuts of any sort on my body. Idk if that makes me strong or weak. So i write and ramble. (Insert a poem here) Letter From The Left Behind Dear Friend, this is my response to a letter you never wrote this is me taking the chance To try and find a way to cope Yes i know i wasn't there before i wish you would have let me know before we found you on the bathroom floor empty bottles of pills and you on the go But friend of mine i miss you so much though i'm guessing the laughs were fake the way we would always make our fists touch after all our secret handshakes. Noone was better than you at seeing all the things that make me me my brother you are no longer breathing why didn't you just come talk to me Though now i'm alone i'll live for us both, as only now i can do. just know when i wrote this, i'm crying all these tears for you. Sorry to bug forums once again. Troll below or let thread die. Or comment. Whatever. I'm out.
Awh Eman. I'm sorry. I feel a lot of us do this to ourselves too. I hit a point like that a few years ago. If you ever need to talk, feel free to message me sometimes it helps to rant to someone.
What do you do? Do you get out enough? Because if you aren't doing much you could just have the problem of being stuck in your own surroundings, alone, and it gets to be unhealthy.
Hey Weapon's, and thanks if it ever gets to that point i will. And Royale i'm a community college student, but think you may be right ever since i lost my jobs to surgery, i've loathed being in my own house, (being on bedrest and whatnot) Maybe it is just the house driving me insane. But it happens whenever i'm alone and have enough still time.
You know where my inbox is E hun i think everyone gets this to different degrees at some point in there life for many different reasons. You did a good thing making a thread about it not only for your own sanity but also because someone who feels the same may read it and feel less alone XxxX
Emanon, I certainly hope things improve for you. Do try to get involved in community stuff when you can. It may not sound appealing, but it's a wonderful feeling.
Yeah Royale, i took your advice. Took a walk earlier, i can't really longboard as well anymore so when im done / back in physical therapy im gonna work gettin back into my circles.
Yeah what Royale said. Behaviour, thoughts and feelings are all linked. Let's say you do more (behavouir) you think to yourself 'I'm doing more than sitting by myself all day' then you start to feel proud and that lifts your mood. That's one of the ways to lift low mood (depression). ? I hope you're much better than last year Emanon. If you ever want to talk about anything just tap my newsfeed, I won't bite.