Much respect to this thread. I myself, like others. Have had suicidal thoughts. Two summers ago i started going through these random stages of depression. It would come and go, sometimes lasting minutes, sometimes days. Nothing in particular caused it. I was in a great mood the day it first started. I would feel as if i had nothing to live for. That I wouldnt be successful no matter how hard i tried, even though I make excellent grades, do extracurricular activities, and I have all the necessities of being successful when I finish with school. So why try? Why keep going? Why should I be here when that's all ill do, is just be here? The reason for me to keep on going i finally decided was because one day, not too long ago actually. My friend said to me she didnt honestly feel like living anymore. I thought to myself, "Yea me either." We sat down in her room and we talked. She began to tell me how she grew up, what she went through, and what she's still going through. Now i wont tell her story for a few reasons, but I had honestly never heard anything more sad in my life. She was crying and my throat had constricted, i was on the verge of tears and I never cry. So again after that she told me she was thinking of killing herself to just end the hurt. And that made me feel sick to my stomach. I looked at her and said, You are worth living, dont let these people, who care not one bit about you make you want to do this. You are beautiful, not only on the outside, but inside as well. Smile and know you can do this. You are worth living. She did smile and we sat there for a while. That's when I decided that that's what im here for, and that's what i wanna do. Help people. I havent had the feelings of depression after that, because I know im worth it and that life's meant to be hard. Who hasnt had a hard life? Ill finish my thread post later lol, im at school now. Have an amazing day everyone
My friend from work killed himself last week. He was found in the town centre in the morning after jumping from a building. How can leaving someone to find you in that awful state not be selfish?
Being someone who suffers from severe depression and PTSD, among other things, and having been a self-harmer and having attempted suicide a few times along with losing people close to me through suicide, I just gotta say... I agree with iEx.
I have total respect for this thread and topic. It is true that there are a lot of weak and pathetic people in this world, but those are usually the people who "attempt" suicide b/c they want attention (in my opinion, not based on facts). Those are the people that I can understand why people say they are selfish, b/c their adding stress onto those that love them. But these people typically have a chemical imbalance, which causes their emotional vulnerability and medication is necessary to correct the chemical imbalances. On the other side are the strong people, who are determined in their efforts and are usually successful at committing suicide. These are people who have dealt with, and put up with so much ignorance and crap with little or no support from anyone. They are the ones who eventually give up, and conclude that no matter what they do, or how hard they try, it will never be enough, things will never change and it will never be worth it. There are always 2 sides to everything. People should think before the speak to or do things that affect others, b/c you never know if or when your words or actions will push someone over the edge.
It's clear that few of the posters here know what they're talking about. Saying nice, pretty things to someone who is seriously contemplating suicide doesn't help. In fact, most of us just think you're lying, since we're already convinced you don't give a shit. What helped me was when a friend found out about my miraculously-intervened-upon attempts (I was incredibly angry with him at the time for stealing and reading my journal, I'm now grateful) and got in my face. He told me I was a fucking idiot and if I wanted to be a little pussy to go ahead and kill myself. There's a saying that fits perfectly here... Only the strong survive.
Hmm, it's amusing that I agree with iEx and epi and the rest of you as well. Suicide is serious...and I don't view it as weak to have depression or anything like that. I do however view it as weak to use something like that as an excuse. I have attempted suicide, been placed in mental hospitals twice...and I went to a residential treatment center when I was 17 for my self harm, anorexia, and drug addiction. I stopped hurting myself when I was 19...had 11 years of hurting myself. I had a hard past...but I DO NOT believe anyone's to blame for suicide besides that person. I see suicide as cowardly. There's multiple ways you could seek treatment and get help. Yeah shit sucks and life is hard but that's no excuse for someone deciding the ultimate form of ending their life. I don't call epi my twinny for no reason. We have the same history basically. I have severe recurrent major depression and PTSD and still struggle with body dysmorphic disorder. I do believe if I had actually succeeded in taking my own life I would have been a coward. My life today isn't amazing, it kinda sucks, but I help people through my past today. For a long time I was an advocate for youth and mental illnesses, I used to speak at a lot of places. I have helped other drug addicts seek and find help and have spoke in detoxes and rehabs. I have given my time to rape victims helping others like me realize that they're not alone and not to blame. I use my experience to support and encourage others. I do not use it as a way to victimize myself and play pity party. I used it in the past to play pity party to myself and only made me more miserable. And for those of you who are going to say some people are to depressed to do as I did, bullshit! I have depression that manifests itself in physical symptoms as well as mental. If I am going through a really bad episode I am not able to get out of bed let alone do anything else. I however do not let that affect me negatively. The more I complain and let my past be my present the more I go deeper into shit. No one is to blame for someone else's suicide. If I had killed myself it wouldn't have been my rapists fault, or the kids who bullied me in school, or the people who beat me, or anyone else's fault. That would have been my decision ultimately. And is in fact cowardly. While yes that person has to be in a extreme amount of pain to make such a final decision...there's ways to prevent or help that person if that person was willing to accept the help. R.I.P Andrew, Billy, Billy, Ben, Andy, Phil, Mike, Chris, Greg, Matthew, Joe, Tim, Rob and Kim. And everyone else who have taken their own life. May they be in happiness and peace now.
Twice for suicidal reasons* the mental hospital thing. Since I've actually been in 3 but one wasn't for suicidal reasons
Also, be careful with what and who you say is to blame for someone else's suicide or attempt or depression. When I was younger I was blamed for my friend Andy's suicide because I wouldn't go on a date with him and he killed himself 2 days later. I wasn't to blame for him doing that, he was.
Everyone faces different pressures and has a view of the world and their place in it formed from different experiences. I don't think its fair to generalise or label all suicidal people as weak nor all non-suicidal people as strong.