Story

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by INACTIVEXD, Aug 4, 2013.

  1. There was a dude named SpitFire who was AWESOME, and all were all struck.
     
  2. Awestruck*

    So gimme feedback, took me 60 minutes to come up with this ?
     
  3. if enough like this, I shalt continue. If not enough like it. Fuck it, ill continue anyways


    Bbl
     
  4. I feel some type if way
     
  5. Chapter 2:

    SpitFire and his homie Kelon went on an adventure to eradicate the evil villains called A-51!!!!!! A group WHO threaten TO decimate the HUMAN RACE!!!!!!! So both strapped on their gear, looked up to the sky and cried some tears, for they might not come back! THESE A-51 peeps was like super dangerous, and only those who had balls or lacked intelligence would dare CHALLENGE THEM In a EPIC battle of ROCK paper Scissors!!!!

    Chapter 3 coming out whenever
     
  6.  must be bored
     
  7. Nah, just messin around with my imagination.
     
  8. I WILLL NEVA LET THIS DIE!!!!! THIS IS FOR KELON
     
  9. This shalt NEVA die
     
  10. Ew. Awful.

    How does it feel?
     
  11. ^
     
  12. Honestly, I prefer all negative feedback over positive 
     
  13. Okay, then here's some negative comments for you:

    It's kinda sad that you spent a hour thinking of one sentence. Third graders can think of better ones. Your grammar is ****, your story has no emotional depth, your characters don't have personalities, your plot is unoriginal, your vocabulary is amateur at best, and you emphasize everything so it turns out sounding childish.

    I sincerely hope you're trying to make a sarcastic piece of writing, because otherwise you can't write well to save your life. Your friend hasn't even read it. Probably because it's awful. Save us the agony and let this die.

    Happy now?
     
  14. oh man, I loved that.
     
  15. But, ill never let mah HARD work diiieeee