Author's Note Hi Fan Fictioners!It's Brooke (again), and I've realised lately that my stories seem to move far too quickly, and there is no suspense what-so-ever!So, I've decided that this story will be a good one, and I've put a lot of thought into this. Also, check out my story, Heartless. This is the first work of fantasy I have done, so, do bare with me, and enjoy... Long Live The Queen! Part One "Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life!" The song by Mica described my life well. I was beginning to worry if I would ever get married, or even find love, and I was sure that I wouldn't. I jumped up from my seat when my computer beeped, and my Mother's face appeared on the small, dimly lit screen. "Hi, sweetheart!" She said, with a huge grin stretching across her tanned face. I paused the depressing music and faked a smile, acting surprised that she had video-called. I loved my mother, but, in truth, she worried too much about me. Ever since I moved in with Dad, she's being checking on me three times a day. "Hey, Mum." I replied. My fake smile had faded, and her happy expression morphed into a concerned one. "What's up?" She asked me, and her face was as worried as ever. I daren't tell her that she was too protective over me, so I simply lied to protect her feelings. "I umm," I paused, thinking. "I stubbed my toe. And it hurts. A lot." I replied, my thick Irish accent making me sound like a complete fool. "OK!" She said. And her smile creeped back onto her face. "So, guess what?" She asked me, clearly excited. "What?" I replied. "Well, Mr. Seerey invited me to come with him to see The Regal Parade, and sit with him, and the Royals, on the Queen's Official Birthday!" She said. I was truly shocked. This was the first video-chat worthy news she had ever given me, and my jaw dropped. "That's great, Mum!" I said enthusiastically. "And, you get to come with!" She added. This made my fake smile turn into a real one. "And we get to meet the Queen afterwards!" I got up off my chair, and danced around my small bedroom, occasionally hitting my hand on the wall. When I sat back down, my Mum was laughing so hard, I was afraid she would die. "I've booked you a flight for next Saturday, and we'll be watching the parade on the Monday!" She screamed with excitement. I loved the country where my mother lived. It was the small country of Coasta-Luna, and it wasn't on most maps, and only heard of by the inhabitants and their families. I couldn't believe it. I was to meet the Royal Family of Coasta-Luna!
Part Two The airport was large, and crowded with lots of people. In order to get to Coasta-Luna, I had to get a flight to Jamaica, and my Mother would then send her Jet to pick me up from there. Her Jet couldn't go from Scotland to Coasta-Luna, as the fuel costs a fortune, and even my Mother was cost aware...sometimes. I clutched my plain ticket close to my chest, and I waited with my Dad for my baggage to be checked. "You sure you want to go?" He said in his deep voice. In a way, I was like my Dad, in that I didn't really show my emotions. I looked up at him, and nodded. "I'm sure." I replied and he nodded his head. "Good." He replied. For the rest of the time, we waited in silence, until the airport man finally came out with my bag. "Is this yours?" He asked me. My heart raced. Was there something wrong with it? Were my dull clothes too insulting to the people of Jamaica? "You're free to go." He said with a smile. I gave out a sigh of relief, and took my one small bag, and continued toward the gate. We got to the boarding place, whatever it's called, and my Dad gave me a concerned look. "For god sake, Ella," he began. "stay safe." He said. He only said this because I was generally clumsy. I spent the entire summer holiday in hospital because I fell down the stairs, and through a window. "I will Dad." I replied. He pulled me into a warm embrace, and I could've sworn I heard him sniffling. "Bye." I said, as I let go and handed the lady my boarding pass. He waved at me, and watched me go through the gate. I couldn't believe it. I was going to meet the Royal Family of Coasta-Luna.
Part 2 (Continued) How terribly rude of me! I forgot to introduce myself. My name is Ella Barnes, and I'm from Belfast, in Northern Ireland. I lived with both of my parents, until they divorced when I was five-years-old. I suppose it's because they married young, nineteen my mother was when they got engaged. I lived with my mother in Coasta-Luna for a while, and I went to school at Luneric City Primary, and then I went on to Luneric City High. Luneric was the capital of Coasta-Luna, and it was also my favourite part of the country. It wasn't a city with tall buildings, it looked like a village, only with a lot more shops and houses. The only really big building there was the Palace, in which the Royal Family lived. When I was seventeen, I came to Scotland to live with my Dad, as I hadn't seem him in a few years. I used to spend three weeks there every summer, up until I was fourteen. I worked at a small Bakery in Aberdeen, on minimum wage. My Dad wasn't the most exciting person in the world, and often he just came home from work, he was a secretary at some company, and slump on the couch, watching the Discovery Chanel. Sometimes, we would eat at the Diner for tea, otherwise, I would make something of whatever was in the kitchen.
Part 3 "Have I found you? Flightless bird! Jealous. Weeping. Or lost you? American mouth!" I sat on the deck chair in my mother's garden, while that song played in the kitchen. It was her favourite song, and my Dad played it in the car on the way to the airport. I loved Coasta-Luna, the sun, the sea, the people. It was like paradise, and my mother had bought me a brand new outfit to wear to The Regal Parade. It was a simple, black dress, it had a U-Neck, and thick shoulder straps, sort of like a business-type dress. It came with a pair of black, suede, six inch heels, and a Chanel diamond necklace. "It's beautiful, Mum. Thanks." I said, in my normal, emotionless voice. I hated dressing up, especially when it involved heels! She pulled me into a tight embrace. "It's fine, sweetheart." She said, then she let go, and kissed my cheek. "I'm going to bed, I have a conference in the morning. Night!" She said, and trotted up the stairs, not looking back. "Night." I mumbled under my breath. I sat back down on the deck chair, and watched the sun set over the mountains. After a while, I got up, and stumbled to the guest room, shutting the door behind me. I perched myself on the edge of my bed, and wrote a letter to my Dad. Dad, Mum is fine. Coasta-Luna is fine. I can't wait to get home, because Mum is becoming more and more protective over me. I think it's because of what happened last summer, and she still believes that's it's her fault. I miss you. See you soon. Ella. I stuffed the piece of paper into an envelope, wrote his address on it, then got into my night gown, ready for my big day in the morning.
Part 4 Today was my pampering day. And while Mum got ready to go to her conference, I jumped in the shower and washed my hair, so that they stylist wouldn't have to. When it was dry, I pulled my boring, brown hair into a ponytail, and put on my favourite skinny jeans, my turtle-neck sweater, and my sneakers. I didn't feel the need to dress up today, because they're going to dress me up there anyway! For breakfast, I had only a bowl of Crunchy Nut Corn Flakes, and some toast, because I didn't really eat much anyway. The car was waiting for me outside, and I hopped in, expecting a stranger to be driving. But this man was no stranger, it was my Uncle, Mark. "Hey there, little lady! Long time, no see, eh?" He smiled at me, and I smiled back, clearly surprised to see him. "Hey!" I said, enthusiastically. "What are you doing here?" "I came out to surprise you. Are you well?" He asked me, his smile reaching his ears. "I'm great now that you're here!" Mark was my favourite Uncle, I used to swim in his pool when I was little. And he bought me the most amazing toys when I was small, too. Some of which I still have! "Good! Now, strap in, and you'll be at the styling studio in no time!" He exclaimed with a cheery manner to his voice. I sat in the back of the Mercedes, reading The Hunger magazine's article on Australian rapper, Iggy Azalea. I turned each page carefully, trying not to ruin the 247 page magazine. Every page was laid out beautifully, and I couldn't help but stare in awe at the amazing pictures. Mark was right, we were at the styling studio in no time. I stepped out of the car, and a very camp-looking man approached me, and kisses both of my cheeks. "Ella, darling!" He spoke with a slight lisp. "Come in, have a seat, and let me work my magic on your gorgeous face!" I was rather nervous about letting him use scissors near my neck, but I let him continue, after all, Mum wanted me to look my best for The Regal Parade. "So, sweetheart. How do you envision your dream hair?" He asked me. I decided right on the spot that he had to be gay, or at least bisexual. "I imagine it..." I was lost for words. "sexy?" The word spilled out of my mouth, it wasn't at all what I wanted to say, but I daren't say something else and look like a complete fool. He fiddled with my hair. "Yes! Sexy, very sexy! Sweetheart, you'll look fabulous when I'm done with you!" He replied, and began chopping thick lumps off of my long, brown hair.
Part 4 (Continued) The man was done in less than an hour, and when he let me look in the mirror, I noticed that I had a very sexy looking hair cut. It was sitting on my shoulders, curled, with blonde and ginger highlights. "Oh my goodness!" I exclaimed, chuffed with the result. The gay man clapped his hands together, put the by the side of his left cheek and sighed. "You look fabulous, darling!" He replied, and took off the dib-type-thing. I got out of the chair, and I was whisked away to the beauty parlour, and they did my make-up, and waxed my legs. This time, I was served by a woman, so I was much more comfortable in the circumstances. She was very pretty, she had hair just like mine, only lighter, and she was unbelievable tall and skinny. "Hello, my name is Louise. I will be doing your make-up!" She said, cheerily. "Now, what shade lipstick do you prefer?" She held up two shades, one a rather dark red, nearly brown, and one a bright red. I gestured towards the lighter shade. "The lighter one, please." I replied. She nodded and put the darker one back into a huge brief case, full of make-up. "I agree, I feel the darker shade a tad too deep for my liking." She exclaimed. I nodded, and let her put on my foundation. My skin was far too pale for any of the foundation colours, so she put on the lightest shade, which was so much more dark than my skin! "Wow!" I said when she was done. She nodded in my direction then grabbed the bright red lipstick that I had chosen earlier. She proceeded to apply it to my lips, then she placed a piece of tissue in between them, and told me to bite it with my mouth, not teeth. "You look amazing, Ella." She said calmly. I smiled at her, and she smiled back.
:3 BUMP But separate the dialogue from the paragraphs unless your decribing how the person his speaking k ^-^
I was taught that you only separate the dialogue from the paragraphs if the dialogue is the start of a new paragraph. Thanks for reading, hun. Next update will be tomorrow.
Isn't that like saying the same thing? If the dialogue is separated from the paragraph because its the start of the new paragraph, doesn't the separation make it a new paragraph? A new paragraph should also be made for dialogue when the speaker changes.
I thought it was a new line, Royale, oh well. I'll continue doing it this way, otherwise it would look strange, but my next story will have separation. Thanks for the feedback!
It's a short update, but I'm tired, and will update heavily tomorrow. Part 5 When I got home, I heard my mother's laugh coming from the kitchen. I then heard a deep voice, clearly male, and wandered into the room to investigate. I saw my mother, sitting on the kitchen island, and in front of her, holding a glass of wine, was a tall, kind looking man. When Mum noticed me, she got down from the island, and approached me, opening her arms. I hugged her, then gave her a strange look. "Ella, this is Mr. Seerey, he is the kind gentlemen who invited us to The Regal Parade." She flashed a smile in my direction. "Hi." I said, turning my body to face Mr. Seerey. I put my hand out, and he shook it, smiling at me. "I'll be upstairs." I said, then I went up to my room, and sat on my bed. I spent two hours practicing my wave, and my hellos. I curtseyed a number of different ways, trying to decide which one I would use. "It's a pleasure to meet you, your Majesty." I said into the mirror, over and over. I still couldn't get over the fact that I would be meeting the Royal Family of Coasta-Luna!
Could we please not turn this thread into a discussion? I am accepting feedback, but now it's more like a debate, and this is my story thread. I know you guys are right, and I will use this technique in my next story, however, I will continue with my style for this one only. Thanks.
I would, but I don't want to push peoples' stories to page two. It's not fair on them. Good suggestion, though.
Part 5 (Continued) The night was long, as I couldn't sleep due to minor starvation. I only had breakfast and lunch, because my mum was blocking the kitchen for dinner. I think part of why I couldn't sleep was due to nerves, I mean, it's the Queen for God's sake! I've always wanted to meet the Queen, and now I will! I sat up in my bed and stared at the dresser, noticing a small, brown envelope leaning against the mirror. I walked towards it, and picked it up, my eyes examining the four addresses on the front. First, it was addressed to me, but it had my address from Ireland. Then, my Coasta-Luna address, then my Scotland address, then, my Coasta-Luna address again. I flipped the envelope over, and saw the return address. Belle Palace, Luneric City, Coasta-Luna My jaw dropped. A letter. For me. From the Palace! I didn't think, my hands quickly tore apart the envelope, and I was left holding a beautiful piece of paper. Dear Miss E. Parry, On behalf of HRH Queen Alexandrina, I would like to offer you the position as Royal Dresser for Her Majesty. We will offer you Palace accommodation, three meals a day, plus snacks, and £50,000 per year. Interested? Please reply to the return address, or come and see me after The Regal Parade, 2013. Yours Faithfully, Michelle O'Brien Her Majesty's Royal Secretary The letter was strange. For one, they knew all of my addresses, even before my mother became well-known here. And, they knew that I was going to be in Coasta-Luna the weekend of The Regal Parade. How odd. Belle Palace, Luneric City Prince James tightened his black bow-tie in front of a large, gold framed mirror. He spun one-hundred-and-eighty-digrees to face his assistant, Tim. "How do I look?" Asked Prince James. Tim tilted his head, then brought it back to normal level. "You look..." He began. "Respectable." He said, and he phrased the 'respectable' as if it were a question. "That's not good enough! Everything has to be perfect for the arrival of Ella Parry tomorrow!" He screamed, his deep voice filling the large bedroom. "I don't see what all the fuss is about, Sir. It's just a gir-" Tim was interrupted in the middle of his sentence. "Just a..." James whispered under his breath. He started walking all around the room, and stopped when he was about 60 yards behind Tim. "Just a girl?!" He yelled, his voice filling the room once more. "This is the future Queen we are talking about! If everything isn't ship-shape for her return, then she is less likely to stay in Coasta-Luna!" James was red with rage by this point. "When she left to go to Scotland, everybody in Coasta-Luna lost hope. But now that she is back, everybody will be able to celebrate, and the prophecy can be carried out!" He spread his arms wide into the air, then looked at the engagement ring on a small table next to a four-poster canopy bed. "This has to be perfect. Or I'll loose her." He said in a slight whisper.
Part 6 I woke up at five-thirty, and went into my en-suite bathroom. I stared at myself in the mirror, then I played Eye of the Tiger and began to violently scrub my teeth. I did this for ten minutes, then I picked up my pink razor and shaved my underarms and my legs again, as I had a little bit of stubble. Next, I attacked my brown locks with my hairbrush, and after fifteen minutes, it looked, in the words of the gay stylist, fabulous! I walked out of the bathroom, and eyed the black dress up and down. I have to wear that? I thought. You have got to be kidding me! I picked up the dress, and began to squeeze myself into it. When I had zipped it up, it was rather tight for my liking, and my boobs were on show. "Yippee," I said sarcastically. "lots of cleavage for the Royals!" It stared at the shoes, the six inch suede heels looked beautiful next to the window, and I couldn't help but smile. I pushed my small feet into them, and practiced walking around in them. After half an hour, I had mastered it! The Chanel necklace didn't look so appealing for my taste. On a small silver chain, it was a collection of small, golden balls. In the centre of each ball, there was a tiny, blue diamond. I put it on, and it weighed down my neck an awful lot. I picked up the letter from the Palace, and walked downstairs. I was ready. Ready to meet the Royal Family of Coasta-Luna.