21 DAYS 9:30 AM - 10:00 AM Numb. Numbness. Thats all I've felt for five years. Numb. Empty. Missing. I'm a jigsaw puzzle with all its pieces missing. A bread bin without any bread containing it. A trash can unworthy of the rubbish it was designed for. You get the point. When I see my sister lying on the floor, starved theres no hurt. Theres no compassion. No love. Just numbness. I should feel something, I should want to fix everything and make her happy. I couldn't even if I did but I don't. She tugs on the tattered edges of my jeans. "Chain...," she whispers, "Is there anything at all?" "I'd give it to you if there was." "Aren't you hungry too?" "Yes." "Go get something." "Fine." I bet you've had a conversation that meant something, that was significant. I haven't. Theres no emotion. Just meaningless information. I stand up and pull the thin material that is our pathetic curtain away from the window. I'd made it out of an old dress of mine. I only have a pair of cargo trousers, a long sleeved, grey, cotton t-shirt, a homemade, leather jacket and my heavy black boots. Thats my daily outfit. "How long till my procedure, Chain?" Ally croaked. " Twenty-one days." "Not long now..." she murmured, as if to herself. Outside Segment one-hundred and seventeen looked melancholy. Ever since me and my sister had joined the rebellion for the procedure life had been eerie. We were only in a small section of the rebellion, seven of us in total. Me, Ally, Preston, Flynn, Glow, Caden and Cadie. Only Preston has had the procedure and me. The others they ran; ran to the rebellion and well... here we are. I thought that after the procedure I would feel better. I would be rid of the hate and anger riddled in all of us. But it didn't work right because they couldn't give me the daily drugs people always took after they'd had the procedure. I ran with Ally because the procedure might have driven me away from my feelings and thoughts but no one is sick enough to let someone else go through that procedure. I realised quickly after it was all a lie. The drugs keep them happy or at least the closest a person with zero emotion can come to 'happy'. A short while later Flynn walks in, his blonde hair damp from the snow that has melted. Theres a small smudge of dirt underneath his chin. He smiles sadly at me and I almost hate him for being able to smile and actually mean the sadness within it. Flynn gently lets the bucket drop to the floor, clattering faintly against the dirty, tiled floor. He soaks Ally's head for a while and we stick to the silence (besides the distant chatter vibrating through the wall behind us. "We're breaking through soon." Flynn says gingerly. "I'm sure we could do it ourselves." I snap at him. "Really? Because we've looked everywhere and Ally doesn't have a blemish on her skin!" "Maybe we can't even get it out..." I whisper the last bit because Flynn doesn't contain his opinions. "Yes we can," his already loud grew louder with each few words, "Just because we found it on everyone else doesn't mean easy doesn't mean shes a lost hope!" he was shouting at this point. "Shut up!" I turned my head to look at Caden. I calmed at the sight of Preston. Preston got that I couldn't understand as well now. He got that the procedure got me really f***ed. He got me and he's probably the only one here who does. The others can't understand. But he does. He feels numb too.
My updates probably won't be daily probably every other day maybe an extra day if something comes up or whatever. I was reading a book and the idea slapped me in the face and well here it is. I'm taking more time over my updates because previously they have been soooooo short and this feels like a devent size and took me round about the time I mentioned above. Thanks for reading.
More typos (I promise to check more thoroughly next time): *I turned my head to look at Preston *Flynn gently lets the bucket drop to the floor, clattering faintly against the dirty, littered tiles underneath our black boots. *He soaks Ally's head for a while and we stick to the silence (besides the distant chatter vibrating through the wall behind us).