I was in a miserable state, I was an emotional wreck, I felt useless, I thought of suicide but knew that feeling like I was already dead was more than enough. My boyfriend stood by my side, not physically but emotionally and mentally, the times I was sad and crying he called me beautiful, he called me his bookie and my favorite; babester. He called a few times and did most of the talking, but if I needed a reply he let me say "uh-huh" or "nuh-huh," he listened to me cry on the phone and done his best to get me to laugh, he stayed on the phone when I had nightmares and got scared. After I had completed my medication the doctor said I was healing wonderfully, but to re-align my teeth I would need an aligner (basically a clear plastic band that in a way looks and works like braces.) I put it on the bottom row of my teeth that I would sleep in. I still had my cast on my arm and leg, the pain from my stomach subsided along with the swolleness, sickness and feeling queasy. The bruises and scratches started healing, scabbing over and turning the sickly green-yellow. It was better than being black and blue in my opinion. Mom was still furious and wanted justice, so she sat up to meet with an attorney. I got a forwarded text from Kristen that Jacey sent saying "the only reason they fought her was they knew she wouldn't fight back. I sat it up and everything, it was too perfect. Lol." Once I showed it to mom she was steaming mad and demanded to have an attorney, I agreed and she went mad crazy looking through phone books. Jacey was one of my best friends and it made me hate her that she could do that to me. I had never done anything to her for her have a reason to want to beat me up. I didn't understand, it didn't make sense to me when I tried to figure out the reasons in my head. The meeting with the District Attorney had said that Jacey could be locked up for kidnap, and a accessory to assault and battery, that she could look at a maximum of at least 5-10 years. The three girls charged with third degree assault and battery and false imprisonment looked at 10-15 years. At the time I was only 17, Jacey was in her early 20's and the three girls were about 18 and older. I just wanted this to be all just a bad dream that I would awake from. I was scared mentally, crying and screaming when I passed by a McDonald's, mom bringing it up or her saying she was getting food from there. It was hard enough to face my bathroom when everyone had went to bed, you know that feeling something is watching you after you watch a scary movie? Yeah, well that feeling of paranoia was intensified by five. I never looked at myself after the accident, I hated mirrors. I didn't want to see the reflection of the monster I had become. I had no idea as of what I looked like since the accident and didn't plan to look for photos of my face, being beat so bad that you felt lifeless, you wouldn't want to see the 'after' results. After more doctor appointments and a few more months my best friend Skylar had starting dating my first boyfriend, I wasn't happy but at the same time I didn't care, I didn't care for him at all so who he dated wasn't of my least concern. I knew the same thing that happened with him and I would happen to Skylar but I wasn't going to repeat myself to her, she knew everything because during arguments I would text Skylar about it. She knew that even before they started talking what she was getting into with him; cheating, lying, accusing, fighting, using.. Ah, well the list goes on. That's why I wasn't happy, because he was setting her up for an emotional roller coaster and she was willingly agreeing to it. After a few weeks she called me, "I'm pregnant, Paige!" My mouth hit the floor, busting down the basement, past to the ground and down farther. I was on shock, they had only been together for almost a month. In shock, anger and being speechless I replied, "well, don't expect your fifteen minutes of fame to be aired on a fucking MTV show. I doubt they show whores, have fun, Skylar." I angrily shouted at her and hanging up, I was done with Skylar. With everyone around me fading I only had Courtney, but her and I was a love/hate relationship. I found entertainment with staying home and watch women on Lifetime murder their husband because she assumes he's having an affair with the office boss. It gave me a reality check that I'm not crazy after all, thank The Lord. My mother found entertainment in drawing male parts on my casts to look perverted while I took naps and liked to blame me when the doctor jokingly asked about it. Thanks, mom, love you too! (Insert laughing faces here.) After one doctor visit mom and I stopped at Walmart, mom wanted some nail polish and beauty products, I was looking at the perfumes when she called me over. I walked back a aisle, "Paige, this lotion is slimy and disgusting, who uses this?!" She handed me the bottle, turning it around, "mom, this is KY Jelly." She gave me a blank stare, "oh! You mean that stuff guys slather on their baby gravy makers so they can slide it riiiiiight on in and go ham?" I laughed at her, "yes, mom" about to walk away, "well, there's no telling whose wang I just touched then." I shook my head while I waited on her.