Sinister honestly your being immature. If she wants to use the name Jack she very well can do so. Not to be rude but copyrighting the name Jack is an moronic thing to even say out loud. One of those things that sounded better in your head. My next RP character will be named Jack just because your being retarded. Bump anyways copyrighting the name Jack, out of all the dumb ass things I've ever heard....
Jack, I legit started cracking up at that. Naviesa, good start so far. :3 All of the criticism I was going to give you has already been said. Bump!
Thank you both Kobe and Fallen Angel!! SORRY THAT i havent updated for so long! UPDATE ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I stared at him and he just looked at me like I was a god. What shocked me even more was what he was holding in his hand. A rose. A single red rose. I managed to stutter out a 'Good Morning' and he just smiled. ''Chris, what are you doing here?'' ''Oh, umm, I just wanted
Thank you both Kobe and Fallen Angel!! SORRY THAT i havent updated for so long! UPDATE ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I stared at him and he just looked at me like I was a god. What shocked me even more was what he was holding in his hand. A rose. A single red rose. I managed to stutter out a 'Good Morning' and he just smiled. ''Chris, what are you doing here?'' ''Oh, umm, I just wanted to come see you, I mean, It's already been a week since we've seen eachother'' I facepalmed, a meer week and he already missed me. As I looked up from my facepalm, I plastered on a smile. He handed me the rose and I just stood there, staring at it. ''What is it for?'' ''Oh, just a sign of our coupleship'' I nearly fainted, coupleship?!?! What did he mean! like, I know er've known eachother for like, 12 years, but, this was going way too fast, I thought we were just friends? I thought it was a one way love, I never knew he loved me too?!?! My heart pounded as I tried to take it all in, I stared at the ebony black hallway carpet@ my face turning a dark pink. ''What do you mean 'coupleship'?'' He shrugged and said: "This is my love confession" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ kyaaaaaaa! Whats going to happen! Will she accept???? Sorry if I had any mistakes, and thank you for reading! Feel free to criticize! ©Copyrighted 2012
My criticism: Proofread for spelling errors and whatnot. Also, remember to put punctuation after each line of dialogue. Bump!
I love it! Criticism: add more specifics to your dialogue statements. "I freaking love you!" (Example ) I yelled, causing a scene.