Hey there folks, welcome to kitteh news, where we talk about the important things! Today I was informed that Timmy the ant was ruthlessly murdered by the man they call, "The foot." If you have any info on the subject, write a poem and send it to me. I like poems. Not haikus, never haikus. Also in the news, bacon prices are going down so stock up on God's gift to the earth. Oh, sweet Jesus, LOOK AT ALL THIS BACON! Now on to sports, with Kittehwars! Thanks, Kitteh. Today the Norther Poop Scoopers took on the East Fire Things in a game of what I assume was football with gun. .... What? .... That was a gang fight? Wow, crazy world. Let's just call it football so I can go home. .... I love you too, now get back in your cage. Now on to politics with Kittehwars! Blah blah blah, politics, blah, Obama, blah blah, economy, blah, I don't understand this, blah. Now back to me with a gun! GET IN THE GODDAMN VAN!
And we go to Cat Lauer on the field report. Thanks, Ray. Blah blah blah. Go fuck yourself, Ray. Thank you, Cat.