---------------------------------------------- Teardrops leak and fall one by one on the pillow that I had clutched to my face in despair. I thought my family could be normal. I thought it'd work. But it hasn't. It's worse then before. And it hurts so much. My brother starts acting up and rebelling as soon as my father goes away. And it isn't the normal-stay-out-of-late kind of rebel. No, this one is much much worse. It's the throw a tantrum and get angry at everything kind of rebel. Our family stopped being normal two years ago. I stopped being a star student and the one that's always smiling two years ago. Today, my brothers's worse though. He's throwing books everywhere, smashing things and yelling. My mother retaliates and yells at him. I don't do a thing. I just sit in my dark bedroom desperately listening to music trying to get rid of the yells from my brain. The images of insults screamed by my family, the fights, the things thrown carelessly all over the place.i don't succeed and when the feeling becomes too much to cope with, I bury myself into my pillow and cry into it. As ironic as it is, in this situation, an inanimate object seems to be my only comfort. I hate humans. I hate how we kill each other yet we continue doing it. In this world a human life is treated like scum, they're treated as if they're no worth. There are so many research going on about the universe, the earth, our history... But does anyone care about our feelings? Does anyone care about a human's feelings? And every if they do, it's only for their profit and gain. They never do it selflessly. Another scream was yelled. Another insult. Another yell. I cower with each sound. I sob and cry as i listen to my broken family who is in ruins. I know that my world changed when my brother was dragged to the police. I just didn't know how much. I didnt know it'd hurt this much. I didnt know I'd want to escape this world so much that I'd want to die. I cry and cry and no one seems to care. I'm broken beyond repair but no one seems to care. No one comes in my room to check up on me. No one comes to comfort me. No one comes and I cry even more with each passing second. I take a deep breath and decide to do it, clenching my teeth in determination. I take the few steps there are to my bedroom window and look out to the sparkling lights of post lamps. I open the window and listen as it creaks. I look down to the ground that seems a mile down. But I am not terrified. I am not scared. I am strangely relieved. I would be giving up my whole life, but I am not afraid. Some part of me realizes that this was meant to be. I was never meant to live for so long. I close my eyes breath in the air of my room and I jump. I feel the night air blowing in my face, my hair billowing around it. I don't open my eyes. I revel in the fast air around me. Everything slows into slow motion. I can hear the shout and panic of the people below as they scream upon seeing me fall from my window. But I don't panic. I scan my memories from my life and focus on the happy ones. So that despite my misery in the past few years, I can at least die with a peaceful mind. I know that I am being selfish, that I will probably leave my family in misery. But I can't seem to find any sorrow. 'Forgive me lord.' I think one last thought ,'for wasting my life that you have given like this' And I fall and crash to the ground. There is unimaginable pain. And then... There is peace around me. ---------------------------------------------- I'm sorta newbie writer. Go easy on me please? Thanks.