ⅈℵ Ϯℌℰ ʂℌąⅆօωʂ

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by *Nichole-Sexiest-Blonde (01), Aug 29, 2012.

  1. A lot of you said I need more detail well here a new story please read comment and Bump if enough ppl like it I'll post more thank you:)
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    I wonder the halls, clinging to my books and my long jacket, watching nothing but the shapes of the cold long death I have before me. I feel the emptiness of my heart as I open the door to my classroom.
    I see the people growing silent as I walk in the room. I look at the evil smirk upon my teachers face. She was a dark head women with big black glasses and a long old timed black lace dress. I looked into her cold heartless eyes trying to not show my fear but on the inside I was shaking in my high tops.
    The teacher points to a chair and mumbles out her name. I slowly pace to my seat as a boy, bout 3 sizes bigger then me, kicks out his feet tripping me in the process. I fall face first into the dark floor panel. Shadows occur around me pointing and laughing. My mouth becomes dry as tears begin pouring from my untouched face. I look around me and see people. But not normal I sees blurs. I try to come to my feet but end up falling back down. I scream for help as the darkness surrounds me. I see nothing....
     
  2. Nice good job
     
  3. Bump!This is great
     
  4. Thanks I'll write another story a little letter:)
     
  5. BUMP! LET ME KNOW WHEN U UPDATE!! U R A GOOD WRITER AND MAKES ME FEEL LIKE READING MORE!! xD
     
  6. Wow that was good very descriptive- update plz
     
  7. 
     
  8. I'll be rewriting more on this account my other one got messed up but update soon! Lol and thanks for reading:)
     
  9. NIKKI THAT WAS SO GOOD!!! 
     
  10. Awesome job! My one piece of advice is to try to avoid repetition. You repeated the word I a lot of times in the middle. Bump!!! =)
     
  11. Hey check out my story it called just a dream please and thank you