Blood Drunk ----^-@

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by *ChaozShadow66 (01), Aug 20, 2012.

  1. ~Alex~
    -As I walk down the halls I feel every one watching me. I hate being the new kid in school.My parents make us move every time "THAT" happens .Well it's not my foult it's in my jeans I was born this way. I never asked to be like this it's not my foult i cant control my self .Pluss im A 15 year old boy what kind of guy wouldnt get these kind of "feelings." -.- I have to try my best to me normal my perents say .How am i suppost to do that? Maybe I like the way i am , i never cared what people tht of me . Why should i now?........ Or tht is what i thought before i met "HER" she changed something inside me . For the better or worce
     
  2. A space AFTER punctuation. Not a space before AND after or BEFORE. Don't use emoji in your sentences. A few run-on sentences and some spelling errors. Half-decent start. ^.^
     
  3. Thts a nice piece good job
     
  4. Nice chaoz:) good start!!
     
  5. Dildo lick one
     
  6. It's genes.
     
  7. Quite a few spelling errors, but overall I quite like it. Try to spell out full words and shorten the sentences so it won't be too difficult to read. 
     
  8. Keep going ignore what they sayBut always go
     
  9. It's called criticism…
     
  10. Yeah well I dnt really care about the spelling and stuff cuz its hard typeing on a small screen and have of the page cuts of when I writte it -.-
     
  11. Use notes? It's not hard.
     
  12. Eh I lost interest in writing this one I'll write later on meh-.-
     
  13. It's a good start but all I can say is paragraphs and spelling...
    Ex. Jeans:genes perents:parents...
    Other than that well done!
     
  14. you should take there advice! but the rest is good!