I am soooooooooooooooo sorry!! I lost my Internet connection: here you go... -------------------______________------- I have never been in a car that was driving so fast. I felt like I was in Formula 1. Fear. We were going to crash? Guilt. Why did this have to happen to Sophia? We both got raped, why wasn't it me who is dying?! "it should be me..." I said aloud Luke looked over at me angrily, "don't you ever say that Luce..don't ever feel responsible for this. It's not your fault and it never will be." I couldn't help but cry. Everything was too overwhelming. "luke...I just need to know something." I sobbed. "what Lucy??" he said, carressing my face whilst keeping his eyes on the road. "you'll stay with me, through all of this?" Luke rolled his eyes, "I could never leave you after what's happened. I love you Lucy." he smiled a watery smile. I tried to smile back, and turned to the road, "LUKE!!!!!" I screamed. Luke rapidly turned his head aroud to the road to see a deer running across; he swirved the car off the road and into a ditch on the side. Whiplash. "ouch..." I groaned. Luke didn't move from the airbag. I reached over, revealing a severly cut arm, and shook him a bit to get him to say something...anything. "Luke? LUKE?!" I sobbed. "COME ON WAKE UP LUKE..PLEASE!!" I screamed, tears streaming down my cheeks like a Niagra Falls. I kept on shaking him violently and screaming his name...screaming so loud. No-one could hear me...not even Luke. We were stranded in the middle of nowhere. Deserted. I un-hooked my seatbelt and awkwardly scurried out of the completley crushed car. I went to my pocket and reached for my cell...it wasn't in there. "FF****CCCKKK YOUUUUU!!!!!!!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. "WHY?! WHY?!?!?!?! why?" I couldn't stop screaming and sobbing. I punched the sides of my head, aggressivley. It really hurt. I didn't want to live anymore. What was the point? "I.....wa-ant...to...di-I-I-ie!!" I said inbetween bawls and sobs. I sat down on the road..crying and trying to punch myself unconcious. It wasn't working so I decided to start and scratch my arms. I sat there, digging my nails into my arms deeply, and clawing my way up my arm all the way to my shoulders. I repeated for what felt like hours. "Sophia is dying, Luke is dead, I need to die. It's my duty." I said evily to myself. I started to rock back and forth. I was slowly turning insane. And so I sat, a few metres away from dead Luke, the love of my life. And a few miles away from a probably dead Sophia, my best friend. I would never find out how she died, why she died. "I'll ask you in Heaven Soph.." I whispered up to the sky. After that it all went black....
Yeah it did, but I'm glad you enjoy it! hehe okay. I need to update for you guys cause I want you to know what happens next, so yeah I'll post later on Love you all
I felt like I was floating. I couldn't be alive. I felt too....dead. I couldn't open my eyes yet, I was too terrified. Terrified I was in Heaven, sounds stupid to be terrified of Heaven, but I didn't want to be dead at 16, not yet. I could feel myself shaking. Maybe I wasn't dead? But then again you may be able to feel everything in Heaven?? I was completley convinced I was dead. I faught with myself whether or not to open my eyes. I took deep breaths..they seemed like a usual breaths. "1...2....3" I opened my eyes. At first I couldn't see anything. Then i realised. I knew exactly where I was...i was in my room. At my house. My own bedroom. I looked around, everything left in it's place since before I went to the party which changed my life. I looked down at my body: I had bandages on my arms and both legs. I raised my arm to stretch it up to my face where I felt a large bandage on my forehead. I had absolutley no idea if I was dead or alive. I tried to sit up, but I felt too heavy. I groaned and squirmed. Finally I sat up, revealing a large cast on my pelvis. "what the...?!" I cried out. I just layed there and sobbed and sobbed and sobbed. I wanted my parents. They knew nothing about any of this. "mum?? MUMM?! DAD?!" I sobbed, trying to unravel the bandages off my arms. I was in shock and panicking. Then to my relieve, my mum came running in, she ran straight over to my bed, and sat down and hugged me, "shhh...ssshhh honey, it's alright baby...calm down..." She was crying, "darling she's alive!" mum turned around to dad who was leaning against the door frame, shaking wildly and crying. I smiled, it was a struggle, but I smiled. "I...I'm so glad to see you...I thought I was dead...you don't know what I've been through Mum...and Dad." I cried. "it's okay...we know everything...we got a phonecall from the police when some guy called Derek found you at a car crash? And he phoned the cops and they did to us..darling I am..we are...sooo sorry....we can't believe what's happened to...we are just so happy to see you alive and well...well not well but okay." she smiled, occasionally glancing back to Dad. "woah woah woah..car-crash?" I asked concerned. Mum and Dad glanced worridley at eachother. Mum put her hand on my face, but before she opened her mouth to explain she broke down crying. "I can't do it John..." she sobbed then left the room. My dad came over and sat down next to me, carefully so he didn't shake my position. He avoided eye contact with me for a while; twiddling his thumbs. When he eventually looked up, he had tears in his eyes. "honey...ermm...there's no easy way to put this but...your friend who you were in the crash with...I believe his name was Luke?" he couldn't continue. Luke? I couldn't remember a Luke. "who's Luke? Why was I in the car with him? Why did we crash?!" I cried, so so confused. "Luke was...your boyfriend...so Sophia told us..." Dad scrunched his eyebrows up. Sophia!! How could I forget about her?! Of course, Luke and I were on the way to the hospital because Sophia was...dying... "wait!" I blurted out. Dad jumped at my alertedness. "Sophia...Luke...OH MY GOD DAD HOW ARE THEY?!?!" I sobbed, everything coming back to me. Dad sighed. "Sophia..she's...she's recovering...she had been brutally bruised and had bleeding from the inside..she hardly made it...she's a trooper...just like you..." he playfully punched my arm. I sighed, a swoop of small relieve waved over me. I scratched behind my ear..."dad..." I said curiously. Dad looked up at me and smiled a sympathetic smile. "I just want you to know that we are all here for you baby..." he said rubbing my arm. "no...no he's not...dad please tell me this is a joke...." I started to hyperventialte. Why was all of this happening to me. "Dad?! How long have I been out for? What happened to Luke?! Dad!!" I sobbed. "he's gone honey...the medics did all they could sweetheart...but it was too late." Dads voice sounded broken and hurt. Tears pricked my eyes, the words sounded so harsh against my delicate ears. All of a sudden my body was shaking like a leaf, my heart felt like it was about to come out of my mouth. "No...noo...NOO!!!!" I screamed, pulling chunks of my hair out. Dad went to hug me, "ITS NOT FAIR DAD...WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED TO ME?! PLEASE...I just need to be alone..." I screamed. "darling...I don't think you're in a stable position right now for us to leave you entirely by yourself." he said calmly. "DAD LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, every muscle and bone tightening and aching. He nodded sharply, "the wheelchair's here if you're ready to get up and come down and see us..I love you." he sighed before he left, then he was gone. I sat there for a few minutes; the only sound was my tears dropping onto my bandaged arms, and the slight whimpering of my sobs. Then, "AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!" I screamed and kicked around everywhere, shrieking and sobbing, uncontrollably, ignoring the excutiating pain I was causing myself. I eventually calmed down and took deep breaths, breaking down into silent sobbing ad tears. I looked next to me, there was a pair of scissors on my bed side table, looked like doctors scissors, to cut my bandages off once I'd healed. I reached out my shaking hand and grabbed them: I held them up to my arms. I slowly scrolled the bandage on both arms, revealing my wrists. I shakingly held the sharp weapon up to my sensitive wrists, I tried to stop the shaking, but it was hard. I suddenly had the violent urge I needed to have to strike my wrists. I went for the right one first, "AHHH!!" I screamed as the unbelievable pain struck my whole body like an electrocution. Then I bravely went for the next wrist...and that was the last thing I remembered....