ρrοlοgυε "It's me! Laylian it's me!" I stood there, knife in hand... Ready to kill. My hand trembled and I gripped the knife tighter so it wouldn't fall. This was my one and only chance... but... I couldn't kill him. I loved him... I loved this boy. "I'm sorry, my Prince," I said and I stabbed the knife through his heart. Tears poured everlasting down my cheeks as he dropped in front of me.I fell to my knees and picked him up and cradled him. Why? Why had this happened to me? I didn't understand. "Well done Laylian," said a deep voice. The same voice that haunted my dreams. I turned around to see [/i] him. My father. Lord of the ravens. My heart began to race and I felt anxious and nervous. He was here... right before me... "So you have done what I have told you to do. Well done my daughter," he said. "Now that the only soul heir to the throne is gone. I will rule this world, and you by my side." This had been his plan? This whole time... he had wanted me to kill the only one I every truly loved... Just so he could become king. I brought the knife to my heart. "Laylian? What are you doing?" he asked. "Now that my mission is over... You have no further use for me. It's over Father. It's all over for me!" "Don't you dare!" "You never loved me! You couldn't kill him yourself, so you needed someone that wasn't born a raven to kill him! I understand that now... Why I was able to be near the Prince... I wasn't a raven. I wasn't cursed like you. You used me... and with my death... You will have everything you wanted, and so will I. I will be with my Prince," I said as placed the knife directly in front of my heart. "Laylian! No-!" It was over. I plunged the knife into my heart and collapsed over my Prince. Everything went dark and my mind was cleared of everything. Death had welcomed me... Or had it?
THE LOGIC TROLL! Yes it has actually the knife went through her heart so therefore.. She is dead.
I don't suppose this story will be seeing a chapter 1 anytime soon ,_, or ever. The beginning was good though.
Ditto! But DETAILS! The four major deets 1) appearances 2) posture 3) surroundings 4) Setting Part from that it's an excellent prologue! Well done.