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...a suit of bacon and hid in his shell all day because vultures always wanted him

 

...one day a vulture cam into his cave...

 

And gave him some cherry pie...

 

They then choked and died.

 

Then he went to Mcdonalds....

 

And then he watched a rocky movie

 

That inspired him to lose weight.

 

And he lost 250lbs

 

And started to fight

 

Someone named CPTWells..

 

And then he won 10,000,000 dollars for winning

 

Then CPT killed the turtle

 

Then the turtle went to heaven.

 

While in heaven he met his running partner, the rabbit

 

Then he gave the rabbit a chocolate wonka bar

 

Died in heaven of chocolate overdose and came back to earth

 

Where he got a pet llama named...

 

Kenny that died everyday and got reborn the next day so they

 

But what they didn't know was that Kenny was also a...