Spiked Tears: Preview (Draft 1)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by DoneDeleted, May 17, 2012.

  1. Life seems like a evergreen flower, all beautiful and majestic, waiting for itself to blossom its gracious leaves of grace. In my life, My petals are fading, faster and faster, crumbling to the surface dying in its holy grave. Only if I made that fateful choice that wouldn't made my life a living pain. The Spiked Tears came back, seeking for a true victim of heart and soul, and that could be anybody...even me.
     
  2. Ooooooo!! Sounds interesting! I want to learn more!!!!!!!!!
     
  3. I am a BIG reader nd I REALLY lik this!!!!
    Good job dude
     
  4. Srry meant girl 
     
  5. My heart paced as each Tear encircled around me, grinning of excitement. I hated their kind. Their nostrils smelling me fear, one dark haired, middle aged woman pounced from a sharp angle and took out a alluring dragon dagger. She held on to the hilt as she waved the sword, trying not to stagger. My mind was clear as I kicked her blows one by one, sending an immense sound that killed the calm, sensitive ear. She violently let out a shriek that made you feel like 100 trucks fell upon you. I clenched my jaw, afraid of me and what I have done...
     
  6. I love this story now, ur a great writer sky, keep writing the story
     
  7. I finally showed my rapier to her cold scaled faced as I said cheerfully, trying to behold the glistening tears in her eyes that had spikes shaped around them ,"Hello, how may I be of service?"She growled huskily,"Nothing, for your prudent kind to have almost killed me, I must say, you have accurate defense. What is your secret?"I grinned mischievously,"Well for you tears, I have no faith in what you do, so why must I speak to you, then killing you and feeding you to my people?"
     
  8. That good I love it good job
     
  9. Yeah u should keep writing sorry like that
     
  10. The tear laughed heartily as if she won a ramble," Is that a threat? I have never seen in my life a human has eaten a tear, cause you know why? We always win! But apparently..."I showed my teeth, craving for answer,"And for a change a human wins! Well, isn't that a SUPRISE?" she Grasped for the ground, trying to get up.
     
  11. She replied hastily as she stride to get a weapon from her scaled bag," you'll regret ever defeating our kind!" She got ahold of her bag. Soon after she fumbled her hands quickly and threw a dagger straight at me but slightly missed and landed to the ground, poison seeping out of it. I abruptly got my backpack and got my bow and arrow. As I focused on my target, I felt to wonder what I would say to everyone else. Would the be frustrated? Overjoyed? Would I get punished? Only way to find out was to try. I shot the arrow at a intense strep angle as it ripped inside the tears eye, suddently making her turn to dust. As she finally drew her last few breaths she begged,"what is your name?"I pondered for a second and replied sternly," My name is Sacoto, destroyer of tears. I hope your kind will now now what your dealing with." The I walked away, looking back as the tear turned to ashes and caused an explosion of poison shoot and seep through the surface.
     
  12. So that's my preview of Spiked tears! If you want me to move on, I must have 10 comments saw I should move on from different people. I hope you'll share this story for me to continue! Thanks so much for my fans, you guys r the greatest people ever! -sky the author
     
  13. U have 2 make more if the story
     
  14. Sky!  holy crap... I love you and your writing babe 
     
  15. 7 down, 3 more 2 go 
     
  16. Bump! I like it
     
  17. I heard you wanted some advice, so here's some. The "In my life, My petals..," "My" should be "my" since the punctuation mark before the word is a comma(,).
     
  18. 1 comment left! Last comment gets a teddy from me :3