Chuck Norris

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by -Snorlax-, Feb 8, 2012.

  1. Chuck Norris doesn't have to do crap for a Klondike bar.

    Chuck Norris once peed on a tractor, it is today known as Optimus prime.

    The extinct species are just animals that chuck Norris didn't like.

    Chuck Norris once went golfing with a man and when the man checked the scoreboard he saw chuck Norris down with 0 hits for that round. He tried to educate chuck and tell him you need at least one hit to finish the course. Chuck Norris was in a good mood so instead of roundhouse kicking him, he dumped gasoline on him and burned him to death.

    A blind man once stepped on chick norris's shoe. Chuck said "excuse me sir do you know who I am? I'm chuck fucking Norris." the mere mention of his name unblinded the man. Unfortunately the first, last, and only thing he ever saw was a swift roundhouse kick to the face.
     
  2. As kids were taught not to talk to strangers... Strangers, as kids, are taught not to talk to Chuck Norris. 
     
  3. When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls fro Chuck Norris


    Fear of spiders I arachnophobia, fear of tight spaces is claustrophobia, fear of Chuck Norris is logic


    Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number, you answer the wrong phone


    Chuck Norris has already been to mars; that's why there are no signs of life there
     
  4. I've never heard any if those  good ones
     
  5. What happens when an unstoppable force meets an unmovable object? Chuck Norris happens. 
     
  6. thanks
     
  7. Chuck Norris can fly through water, swim through land, and walk on air.
     
  8. I liked chuck Norris till he was in that world of Warcraft camercial when football was on
     
  9. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
     
  10. Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people. Then the grenade exploded.
     
  11. I love chuck!! I have several episodes of walker recorded on my dvr.
     
  12. Chuck Norris have XBox Live on his PS3
     
  13. Chuck Norris once hit a deer with his truck. He then put the truck down and drove away.
     
  14. Superman and bat man had a fight who won. Chuck Norris