I've been down in the dumps lately, my depression has been taking hold of me, I'm hoping after I say what's been bugging me that I could recieve some words of encouragement to help me get over this hump: It all started with my childhood, my father was in the military so we were always moving around, due to the fact i was always the new kid, i was the easy target, easy to be picked on. My father was both mentally and physically abusive. I feel like i was robbed of my childhood, i couldn't never had friends, or had been in any relationships like any other person would be throughout school. It continued up into high school, I did make a few friends but everyone kinda disappeared out of my life. Fast forward to my first relationship: I had met her online, we had talked a lot and eventually decided to meet, everything went great and eventually we moved in together. We had been dating a while, approximately a year before I decided to pop the question and she said yes. I'm old fashioned and wanted my first to be my last. Well later that month I had found out that she had been cheating on me the whole time. Since she was my first relationship it had hit me pretty hard, especially since I was 20 at the time, I thought I was never going to find anyone else, so I fought to get her to stay, long story short she didn't stay, got married not even 3 months later and wound up pregnant with the guys kid. She also made everything seem like my fault so it made me feel like I wouldnt be good enough for anyone Fast Forward to my 2nd relationship: So I was working at the time and everything was going good, I met this woman while walking home one day. She was a mother of 2 kids, I love kids so it didnt bother me much, I had just turned 23. Everything went well for the first 3 months. One of her exes had stopped in town for a visit and she had went out with him and left me with her kids. I thought it was gonna be a little visit but it was much longer than that, I had started to panic and due to my first relationship how things ended there, so I had been texting her almost ever half hour. When she got back and after he left she had decided to tell me she had slept with him and was getting back together with him. I had an absolute meltdown and wound up getting suicidal. Long story short I wound up sticking around he moved in and while he was at work she was extremely abusive towards me, pulling knives on me at least once a week. TL;DR I'm scared to enter relationships When I do enter one, i hold on tight and wind up getting clingy Im constantly scared im doing something wrong
you should go see a therapist dude no one in forums is properly equipped to help u cope with all of that
Therapists dont help from my experiences, they just make me feel weird when it comes to face to face interactions. I've been on multiple different anti-depressants and none of them have worked either I'm running outta options
there are therapists that do not do face-to-face sessions. check out this app. good luck but remember that pimd is definitely not the proper avenue for mental health assistance.
I mean, you probably are doing something wrong. I have no clue what you want ppl here to say tho. Agree w Muschi, talk to a therapist maybe. There are online therapists.
Oh dear. I hear you on the difficulty to build and maintain friendships though. 😂 but like PIMD forum users are def not the best people to ask for serious help.
I was more hoping for people whom have been through similar situations who could help by telling me how they've gotten through it but I guess that's not how it came off?
I have been thru trauma and mental illness, and can go into details if you'd like. I got thru it by talking to a therapist and a psychologist, and being put on medication. 🤗 So my advice 100% came from personal experience.
You don't need to be mean. You can be assertive... Rn you're being very passive in your relationships.
Personally, anti-depressants turned me into a zombie. 1000% would not recommend. Tbh it seems you’re a pushover. 🤷🏽♂️ focus on yourself and the love of your life is gonna come into your life at a random time. Or you’ll become a cat person. Cats are amazing though.
Um. I haven't been through exactly what you've been through but I have typically gotten through rough patches and depression by being as busy and productive as possible. When I'm getting all the stuff I need to do done, everything else seems to fall in place.
It doesn't help having social anxiety, and that I never get outta the house cause I'm constantly watching my nephew. We actually have a cat already, hes more dog though
Couldn't you take your nephew out to like a park or something? That way you aren't being cooped up in the house. Or even just a walk around the neighborhood if you don't have any local parks.
Maybe if the area wasnt as bad, I mean idk about you but I dont want my nephew around crackheads and the homeless, plus we live in a desert, its constantly 100°+ on a daily basis, so he'd only be able to be out there like 30-45 mins at most
Stop watching your nephew then. 😂 He isn’t your child. I’m not much of a people person either but if I allow myself to stay home 24/7, it drives me crazy. Keeping busy with a full-time job helps, school as well. Concerts definitely help me! Especially underground rap concerts. The mosh pits always help me get rid of bad energy I’ve been holding onto.
If I can’t get out to a concert, anime is great too. Hunter X Hunter is rly good. Start off with mainstream anime and you’ll come out to some rly great titles. Eventually.